When they are up in the polls
They
flaunt the figures outrageously
But
when they are down and falling
They
ridicule them vigorously
Sometimes
stressing fickle public opinion
Or
protest votes and volatility
When
they are only down a little
They
play the underdog playing for sympathy
When
they are neck and neck
They
feign surprise at their popularity
Cabinet ministers apply the following rules:
And
must adopt these rules immediately
If
put in a position
Where
they must make a decision
They
delay it immediately
If
they, can they delegate it to a junior
So,
the junior can avoid making a decision
If
all else fails, they form a committee
So,
the committee can avoid making a decision
If
they can in anyway whatever
Avoid
making a decision
They
do so immediately
Woking so wants a claim to fame
So
tenuous links to the famous they list
On
the official Woking web site
Such as Adelina de Lara, Concert pianist
The Spice Girls and George Bernard Shaw
Queen Elizabeth I and Lady Hamilton
Paul Weller, Peter Gabriel, Rick Parfitt
Peter Davison, The Jam and Eric Clapton
Sir Alec and Eric
Bedser the Cricketing twins
These
and many more appear for their sins
H.G. Wells is a particular favourite
With several places in town with his name on
But when he wrote “war of the worlds”
He had the Martian land on Horsell common
Because sadly while in the town he hated it so
He made sure that Woking was the first place to go
Don’t you just hate drivers
Who
jump traffic light on red
Leaving
chaos in their wake
And
leaving someone dead
In
the woodlands of burgundy
A
bright light of impressionism
Was
cut down by Prussian rifles
In
the name of French imperialism
His
corpse left decaying in a ditch
Found
by his father under burgundy skies
A
founder member of a movement
Unnamed
until long after his demise
