You should never
Underestimate
the powers
Of
stupid people
Friday, 9 April 2021
IT’S THE QUIET ONE’S
It’s the quiet or silent men
That
women have a liking
For
the very simple reason
THE LABORS OF HERACLES # 12: THE CAPTURE OF CERBERUS
Heracles when driven mad by the goddess Hera
Murdered
his three children and his wife Megara
The
Delphic oracle punished him for the murders
By
ordering him to perform the Twelve Labors
The
labors were set by his cousin king Eurystheus
Heracles
final labor was the capture of Cerberus
He
was instructed to bring the up the hellhound
From
Hades the kingdom of the dead underground
You
must first cross the river Styx to reach Hades
Which
for the first problem for our hero Heracles
In
order to cross the river, you must first be dead
If
not, have a bribe for Charon the boatman instead
Heracles
met neither condition aggravating Charon
But
He simply glowered fiercely at the ferryman
And
Charon meekly conveyed him across the river
The
greater challenge was yet to come however
Cerberus
had three heads, and all had razor teeth
Covered
with snakes on its back and underneath
It
also had another great venomous snake for a tail
And
over this hellhound Heracles had to prevail
The
venomous snakes lashed out at Heracles wildly
While
Cerberus lunged at the heroes’ throat directly
Fortunately,
he was wearing his lion's skin cape
The
impenetrable hide and helmet with jaws agape
He
eventually choked Cerberus into submission
And
dragged it to Tiryns for his due recognition
TELEGRAM SAM
The telegram boy knocked lightly
He
was new and nervous slightly
No
response so he went around back
And
fished the message from his sack
He
held a message for the occupant
Who
was now calling at the front
It
was an elderly lady calling him
“Oh,
how exciting a singing telegram”
“It’s
just a normal telegram,” said he
“Well
sing it anyway,” said the lady
“I
don’t sing the messages” he insisted
“Oh
please” the old lady persisted
“Well,
this is not a singing telegram
As
I have already told you madam
But
here goes anyway” the boy said
Da
da da #Your sister Rose is dead#
RULE BRITANNIA # 4
I say I’m glad to be British
And
similar refrains
Because
when riding through
Our
towns in cars and trains
We
do not see any sacred cows
Wearing
daisy chains
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