MUSIC OF MARRIAGE

 I think Marriage is very much

Like a violin or some such

After the sweet music is over

Strings are attached moreover

ARE YOU WEARING A CHAPEAU?

 

Are you wearing a chapeau?

That’s the French for hat you know?

Well, you look quite sweet I must say

Though I’m not a huge fan of the beret

And the rather limp looking overcoat

It isn’t really what you’d call haute

But I need to find a condom dispenser

Because I have a thing for Frank Spencer

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 289

 

If wishes were horses

Then beggars would ride,

But they’re not

So, get off my pony

THE LABORS OF HERACLES # 10: THE CATTLE OF GERYON

 

Heracles when driven mad by the goddess Hera

Murdered his three children and his wife Megara

The Delphic oracle punished him for the murders

By ordering him to perform the Twelve Labors

The labors were set by king Eurystheus his cousin

His tenth labor was stealing the cattle of Geryon

The three headed Geryon owned the herd of cattle

It was he and two headed Orthrus he had to battle

After clubbing the hound with just a single blow

Heracles stole the cattle dispatching Geryon also

HUMEROUS HUBBY

A husband is living proof

If any were needed

That a wife can take a joke

It could be conceded

CAP IT ALL

 

If the cap fits

Then wear it

If the shoe fits

Get another like it

LIAR LIAR

Everybody lies

Yes, everybody’s lying

But it doesn't matter

Since nobody listening