MY ONCE SWEET WIFE HAS BECOME MEAN

 

My once sweet wife has become mean

And short tempered thanks to the menopause

I try to be sympathetic but on her really bad days

I think it’s more like the mental pause

MENOPAUSE FOR THOUGHT

 

There is a natural order in life

There are rules to be understood

For example, bearing children

There is a time limit on motherhood

The term “childbearing years”

Was coined for a very simple reason

So that everything in life

Can have its time and season

A Woman over fifty is ill equipped

To show a baby proper care

As she would put the baby down

And then forget where

MENOPAUSAL MONITOR

 

George was unhappy

With his wife’s erratic mood swings

And his work mates

Told him of the benefit s of mood rings

So, he went out a bought one

So, he might monitor her mood

He had his reservations

And he thought the idea quite crude

But when she was in a good mood

The stone in the ring turned bright red

And when in a bad mood

It left a huge bruise on his forehead

He came to the conclusion

That he would throw away the mood ring

And try a new tack

Such as buying her a diamond ring

FOR MY 60TH BIRTHDAY

 

For my 60^th birthday

I bought myself a sports car

It’s my pride and joy

Not that’s it’s been very far

As there is a slight problem

An oversight I have to admit

I need a hip replacement

Before I can get in it