SAINT PATRICK'S DAY CELEBRATIONS

 

On Saint Patrick's Day,

As well as celebrating

The heritage and culture

Of the Irish peoples

Celebrations involve

Public parades and festivals,

Wearing of green attire

And displaying shamrocks

And drinking to excess

 

His feast day is March 17th

POTATOES ARE A STAPLE

 

Potatoes are a staple

On St Patrick’s Day

And mashed potatoes

Are just Irish Guacamole

5TH CENTURY IRELAND

 

In 5th century Ireland:

St. Patrick decreed

Women can propose

Marriage to a single man

On February 29th

ONE POTATO TWO POTATO

Roast potato

New potato

Boiled potato

Sure

Mashed potato

Waffled potato

Baked potato

More

Wedges with dips

Hash browns and Chips

You should eat your fill

Of the Dublin mixed grill

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 49

 

The Owl and the Pussycat went to sea

In a beautiful pea-green boat,

Though they were jolly, their expedition was folly

And the coast guard sent a life boat

So when the Owl and the Pussycat went to sea

Safely ashore we were able to see

Because the couples distress, the whole sorry mess

Was filmed by the BBC

AT THE ST PATRICK’S DAY PARTY

 

At the St Patrick’s Day party

A guy was playing the Ukulele

But he didn’t know when to stop

Until he was hit with a Shillelagh

ST PATRICK'S DAY PICK UP # 1

 

When you’re on the pull

If you want to break the ice

Say something funny

Or say something nice

Be complimentary

Or just lie in your endeavour

Be devastatingly witty

Or say something clever

“Do you have any Irish in you?”

Ask her, on St Patrick's Day

And if she answers yes, reply

“You can have some more today”

ON ST PATRICK’S DAY

 

On St Patrick’s Day

You know an Irish rover

Has had enough to drink

When they’re Dublin over

THE IRISH CELEBRATE ST PATRICKS DAY

 

The Irish celebrate St Patricks Day

And I have always wondered why

As they have three patron saints

Perhaps Patrick had a better PR guy

YOU CAN DRINK GREEN BEER

 

You can drink green beer

On any St Patricks Day

It counts as a vegetable

And one of your five a day

ST PATRICKS DAY IS AN EXCUSE

 

St Patrick’s Day is an excuse

For girls to dress inappropriately

That’s why St Patrick’s Day

Is the best holiday for me

ST PATRICKS DAY FANCY DRESS

 

My friend asked me

What I was going to be

For St Patrick’s Day

I said “Drunk will do me”

ST PATRICKS DAY IS ONE OF THE FEW

 

St Patrick’s Day is one of the very few

Acceptable times to wear body glitter

When you have a reasonable expectation

Of not being mistaken for a stripper

DRINK GREEN BEER

 

Drink green beer

On St Patricks Day

It will count as one

Of your five a day

ST PATRICK'S DAY PICK UP # 2

 

When you’re on the pull

If you want to break the ice

Say something funny

Or say something nice

Be complimentary

Or just lie in your endeavour

Be devastatingly witty

Or say something clever

“Do you have any Irish in you?”

Ask her, on St Patrick's Day

And if she answers no, reply

“Do you want some today?”

NO! YOU DON'T IRON FOUR LEAF CLOVERS

 

No! You don't iron four leaf clovers

That something you must never do

Because let’s be honest you don’t

Want to go pressing your luck do you

I GOT VERY DRUNK ON ST PATRICKS DAY

I got very drunk on St Patricks Day

So, I took a bus home to save any fuss

This may not be a big deal to most

But I had never before driven a bus 

AT THE ST PATRICK’S DAY PARTY

 

At the St Patrick’s Day party

A guy was playing the Ukulele

But he didn’t know when to stop

Until he was hit with a Shillelagh

ARE YOU WEARING SHAMROCK?

Are you wearing shamrock?

And Patrick is patron saint, but why?

Did he drive the snakes out of Ireland?

Or did he just have a great PR guy? 

ARE YOU WEARING A SHAMROCK?

Are you wearing a shamrock?

Ireland’s national emblem

The young clover symbol

Displayed out of patriotism