COMFORTING THE TEACHER

 

Something upset

My English teacher

So I said to comfort her

“There, their, they’re”

I ONCE KNEW A GIRL CALLED JO # 4

 

I once knew a girl called Jo

Jo with the all over tan

Jo Jo the Can Can

The perfect gift for a man

Who had a beautiful

White toothed smile

AT MY ADVANCED AGE # 2

 

At my advanced age I find

I am surprised by something

The presence of public toilets

Are worryingly comforting

IT'S SAD THAT IN DEMOCRATIC AMERICA

 

It's sad that in Democratic America

That Black Friday gives them more of a lift

Than Good Friday, as they are more

Interested in bargains than the greatest gift

I LOVE PENGUINS AND ALWAYS HAVE

 

I love Penguins and always have

But have you ever wondered which side

Of a Penguin has the most feathers?

It’s ok it’s a trick question as its the outside

I PLUGGED MY ELECTRIC BLANKET INTO THE TOASTER

 

I plugged my electric blanket into the toaster

Not deliberately, I knew that wouldn’t be right

It really happened by mistake, but it happened

And as a result I kept popping out of bed all night

ARE YOU WEARING A COCKED HAT?

Are you wearing a cocked hat?

With red, white and blue on

I hope you’re going to a party

And you don’t think you’re Napolean