I USED TO BE INDECISIVE

 

I used to be indecisive

At least I thought so

But I am now quite sure

That I don’t actually know

SHE WAS A REAL NATURE GIRL

 

She was a real nature girl

Dancing happily in the meadows

Like a flitting summer sprite

With no thought of cares and woes

As she frolic’s like a lamb all day

Till the lengthening of the shadows

I MET MY PROSPECTIVE FATHER IN LAW AT THE WEEKEND

 

I met my prospective father in law at the weekend

And he seemed quite normal when I saw him

So, I was quite pleased until my girlfriend said

“Everyone seems normal until you get to know them”

I NEED YOU TO DELETE ME FROM YOUR ADDRESS BOOK

 

“I need you to delete me from your address book”

My ex-girlfriend emailed me to express

I pondered for some time before I replied

“Who is this? And how did you get this address?”

MY SISTER IS A SOPHISTICATE

 

My sister is a sophisticate

And has travelled far away

She’s been to a Taj Mahal

That isn’t an Indian takeaway

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 413

 

Doctor Foster

Went to Gloucester

But the police followed

As he was an imposter

ARE YOU WEARING TARTY GARB?

 

Are you wearing tarty garb?

Well, I will say this for a start

You might well get picked up

But no one wants to date a tart