21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 397

 

Molly, my sister and I fell out,

And what do you think it was all about?

Well I loved Miranda and so did she

And she made Miranda cheat on me

ARE YOU WEARING SLACKS? # 2

 

Are you wearing slacks?

It’s certainly very casual attire

But not the kind of look

The fashion world desire

But fine for ordinary people

Who don’t set the world on fire

RICHARD GURLEY DREW

 

Richard Gurley Drew invented sellotape

In order to help out a mechanic friend  

I got his autobiography for Christmas but

I didn’t finish it as I couldn’t find the end

MY DAUGHTER WAS GIVEN A NOVELTY GIFT

 

My daughter was given a novelty gift

Which really wasn’t intended to confuse

But the look on her face was a picture

When she held a pair of chocolate shoes

I HEARD ON THE NEWS THAT A HIJACKED SHIP

 

I heard on the news that a hijacked ship

Had been taken by smiley pirates

I thought that sounded quite nice but

It turned out they were Somali pirates

 

THE RSPCA WERE CALLED

 

The RSPCA were called to an emergency

But unfortunately they didn’t arrive in time

The animal was dead in the Xerox machine

It was reported to police as a copycat crime

I SEE DECEIT IN YOUR FACE

 

“I see deceit in your face” said a wife

Following her husband’s deception

He didn’t help his case when he inferred

It was “a personal reflection”