72 Miles From The Sea

Saturday, 18 February 2023

Jack and Jill

Went up the hill

And at the summit

Jack does Jill

Are you wearing spivs garb?

You are doubtless here to chisel

Hawking your counterfeit goods

Doubtless all sausage and no sizzle

Tinderfella went to the dance

Looking for a little romance

But in the end he didn’t find her

Because they were all on grindr

I went into hospital for minor surgery

And the anaesthetist was a bit of a clown

“Did this patient sign the organ Doner form?”

He said as I was lying there in my gown

An elderly female driver was seen by police

Driving on the motorway very dangerously

She was knitting a jumper while at the wheel

The police told her to Pullover immediately

William Shakespeare wasn’t allowed

To drink in his local hostelry

And the reason for that was because

He had been Bard obviously

Kermit the Frog’s car

Broke down one day

So, he phoned the AA

And it got Toad away