I COULDN’T GET THE OLD BANGER

 

I couldn’t get the old banger

Started this morning

I tried to get her to turn over

As the day was dawning

But to no avail, she just

Lay there yawning

ON A FIRST DATE DO NOT CHOOSE

 

On a first date do not choose

A restaurant to meet her

Because it’s not conducive

With your being a messy eater

THAT DRESS IS QUITE REVEALING

 

That dress is quite revealing

Your breasts it’s barely concealing

I think perhaps your teasing

Offering them up for squeezing

Your bust does look rather ample

Go on let me have another sample

ALWAYS READ STUFF THAT

Always read stuff that

Will make you look good

If you are struck with death

Earlier than you should

AN EARLY SIGN OF SUMMER

 

An early sign of Summer

But make no mistake

One swallow does not

A stag night make

DO YOU LIKE PICNICS?

 

Do you like picnics?

There’s one on Sunday

If you say yes

It could be a funday

But let me say

Before we begin

Bring a blanket and be

Prepared to sin

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 206

 

The fair maid who, the first of May

Goes to the fields at break of day,

And picks strawberries ripe and juicy

Isn’t a native of this country