ARE YOU WEARING BALLET SHOES?

 

Are you wearing ballet shoes?

Not really suitable attire,

If you don’t mind me saying,

For working on the farm squire

RED DOOR

 

What is behind the red door?

Does danger lurk out of view?

Why do I hesitate before knocking?

Just because of its crimson hue

I have no answer, but I do know this

I would not hesitate if it were blue

I WAS ONCE A MEDICAL STUDENT # 3

 

I was once a medical student

But I didn’t really try

When asked about the “fibula”

I thought it was a small lie

I TRIED TO EXPLAIN TO MY EX WIFE

I tried to explain to my ex wife

The basic premise of reincarnation

Which is that when you die you get

To return as part of God’s creation

But you come back as a different creature

After a moment’s thought she said

“I want to come back as a cow”

The concept had clearly gone over her head

WHEN I PHONE A WOMAN

 

When I phone a woman

And talk dirty to her

I’m a sexual harasser

 

But when a woman

Talks dirty to me

I am a good customer

APPROACHED BY A WOMAN

Approached by a woman

Doing customer research

The perv decided he wasn’t in a hurry

So would stop and assist her

"What do you use for grooming?”

She asked “could you take a look”

“No need to consult your list”

He said “I only use “Facebook””

I JUST BOOKED A TABLE FOR VALENTINE'S DAY

 

I just booked a table for Valentine's Day

For me and my wife

I hope she likes it, even though she can’t

Play snooker to save her life