21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 29

 

Little Boy Blue

Come blow your horn,

And I’ll make you a superstar

In the world of porn

PUT DOWN # 28

 

Put downs work the best

For deflecting unwanted attention

But try to be amusing

As this relieves the tension

If he uses the line

“Have you heard we’ve been brought together by cupid”

So just reply to him

“I like you; you remind me of when I was young and stupid.”

THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – EUTERPE (MUSE OF LYRICAL POETRY)

 

The nine muses

Daughters of Zeus

Inspiring of mortals

And nurturers of the arts

The fourth was,

The divine Euterpe,

Rejoicing well,

Was firstly the muse of music

Then of Lyrical poetry

A double flute in her hand

Euterpe the Giver of delight

DRIVING RAIN

 

Wiper’s swish

Expelling the rain drops

Heater whirls

Expelling heat to clear the mist

Headlights burn

Expelling darkness and fear

It’s a dirty night

But the doggers will be here

MUSICAL FUSION

 

There’s a new music fad or fashion

A genre of Swedish/Australian fusion

They play Dancing Queen and Waterloo

On the wobble board and the didgeridoo

I don’t know if it will catch on at all

They call the music Abbariginal

A STIFF DRINK

 

Viagra may soon be available in liquid form,

And will assist the flaccid when it’s done

By making it possible for a man to perform

By literally pouring himself a stiff one

DEFYING GRAVITY # 2

With so many treatments for erectile dysfunction

In future there will be a large octogenarian population

Of grandpas with erections to answer grandma’s prayers

Who can’t even remember why they went upstairs