CATERING FOR EVERYONE

 

The funeral directors

Have an annual dinner dance

You should go some time

If you get the chance

The foods not up to much

Considering it cost a packet

The strangest dish however

Is “Chicken in a Casket”

WHAT WERE YOU DOING?

 

People of a certain generation

Older than baby boomers anyway

Know exactly what they were doing

The day Oswald assassinated JFK

 

I have no inkling what I was doing

I was only seven years old you see

I would definitely know however

Had they assassinated Mr Pastry

 

I do know what I was doing exactly

When first I heard Bohemian Rhapsody

I remember like it was yesterday

And who I did it with on her settee

INFINITE TIME

 

Time itself is infinite

So infinite as to be immeasurable

By time itself

Our own time, upon our earth

A lifetime is so short

A life’s time passes in an instant

So quickly

It would fail to register

As the merest twitch

Of the sweep hand

On the mighty time piece

The great universal clock

IN THESE TRYING TIMES

 

In these trying times

Innovation is required

To make the most

Of any opportunities 

Like a pop-up restaurant

Which sells toast

WHATS IN A NAME (17)

 

Does anyone think is Tom Good?

Did anyone else think Natalie Wood?

Does anyone know was Lionel Blue?

Did anyone know if Nancy Drew?

MEAL DEAL

 

The kids have a happy meal

When we go to McDonalds

Why don’t they extend the range?

To meet demands at Ronald’s

As we’re not always happy

Hysterical or even jolly

What about manic-depressives

And the sad and the melancholy

Instead of a plastic toy

Perhaps a more practical addition

With every melancholy meal

A pot of Valium or Mogadon

ONE BORN EVERY DAY

To make something foolproof

Is an impossibility

Because fools never fail to show

Such ingenuity