The new trains are really smart
A
bit wobbly and I had to stand
As
there is less room to sit
Because
the toilets are so huge
For
wheelchair access supposedly
Just
in case a disabled person
Ever
manages to get on to a train
By
negotiating all the other obstacles
The
train companies put in their way
But
the toilets are so vast
I’m
sure they’re big enough to fit in
The
Dagenham girl pipers
There is a law of equality
Which
is concerned with probability
Namely
a given events occurrence
Is
inversely proportional to desirability
The difference between
Taking
many lives away
And
the making
Of
a brand-new life today
Either
being blasted into eternity
By
a guided missile
Or
being blasted into maternity
By
a guided muscle
I have found many reasons
Not to be foreign without doubt
Such as papers and magazines
With none of the bits cut out
The baud rate is simply
Computer terminology per se
Which is a measure of how soon
The Ornithes Stymphalides were birds of a fierce and man-eating breed
Who
used as arrows their metallic feathers, which were sharp indeed
The
sixth Labor of Heracles was to drive these birds out of Arcadia
But
because of their deadly metal arrowed feathers could not get near
But
to scare the birds of lake Stymphalus he used a rattle that was brazen
Once
in the air he brought them down in a hail of his arrows by the dozen
Upon the wooded hill
The
forest sentinel stood
Made
from wind falls
Wooden
scraps and ullage
Skilfully
fashioned
To
become, complete with binoculars
The
birdwatcher
But
all was not as it seemed
For
the sentinel
Destined
to forever study
What
fell before his gaze
Every
autumn
Turned
his attention upon
His
favorite birch tree
Who
when the autumn wind blew
Began
to shed her leafy canopy
All
the year round he studied
In
detail her fully covered form
But
in the autumn, he could
Revel
in her nakedness
The
sentinel spoke to himself
“Oh,
I’m getting a woody”
And
with that his sap began to rise
“Oh
no too soon, too soon”
Then
all too suddenly it was over
So,
upon the wooded hill
The
frustrated forest sentinel stood
Staring
through his binoculars
And
telling himself
“There’s
always next year”
