A husband is like a palatable wine
Having started in a bunch as a grape
Then stomped on in order to refine
Kept in the dark to ripen and mature
Until fit company with whom to dine
Wednesday, 13 January 2021
SPOT THE PARTNER
Trying to find a partner in life
Is like looking for parking places
The good ones have already gone
And the rest are disabled spaces
THE SEVEN WONDERS OF THE ANCIENT WORLD – THE GREAT PYRAMID OF GIZA
The great pyramid of Giza is not only the oldest of the seven wonders but is also the only one to have survived to the present day.
It stands near the ancient city of Memphis on the Giza plateau, a necropolis or tract of land used for burials now part of modern Cairo.
Although there are three pyramids standing on the Giza plateau it is only the largest of them that is actually one of the seven wonders, the great pyramid of Khufu more commonly referred to as the pyramid of Cheops.
The pyramid was built around 2560 BC by and for the pharaoh Khufu intended to be both his tomb and a great and lasting monument after his death.
The tombs construction is believed to have been achieved over a period of twenty years.
The exterior of the pyramid now have a stepped appearance though when it was completed it has a smooth covering of stone which the desert winds have worn away over nearly four and a half millennia.
When it was built, the Great pyramid stood 481 ft high but 30 ft has been worn off the top over its many years and the base consists of four equal sides 751ft in length.
It wasn’t until the latter part of the nineteenth century that the great pyramid was surpassed as the tallest structure on earth a position it had occupied for over four thousand three hundred years.
Perhaps one of the most fascinating aspects of the Pyramid is the incredible mathematical accuracy involved in its construction.
The great pyramid was built to such great precision using very rudimentary techniques which even with all of our 21st century technology we cannot replicate.
THE FASTEST THING
There was an Englishman and a Welshman
Talking to a Scotsman and an Irishman
They were all sitting down discussing
What could possibly be the fastest thing?
The Englishmen I know what it ought
It has got to be the process of thought
The Scot nodded and said in a flicker
Good try but I think blinking is quicker
The Welshman thought and said quickly
I believe it has got to be electricity
The Irishman said they don’t come near
The fastest thing is in life is Diarrhoea
I went out last night to have a curry
Drank twelve pints of beer in a hurry
I awoke in the night I felt my heart sink
Because Before I had any time to think
No time to blink or switch on the light
I had Diarrhoea in my pants last night
DEFINING
If clergymen can be defrocked and lawyers be disbarred
Then that must mean that tree surgeons can be debarked
And musicians be denoted, and hair stylists get distressed?
Can tour guides be detoured or dry cleaners get depressed?
Will magicians be disillusioned, and will fishermen be debated?
Must songwriters be decomposed, and politicians denominated?
Should writers be described, and must models be deposed?
Will a princess be disenchanted, or dustmen be well disposed?
HAMLETS BREAKFAST
Ah cold porridge! I think not, waitress: marmalade
Of infinite zest, on toast lightly browned. I’ll have
A pot of coffee black a Colombian blend and now how
About juice freshly squeezed and that’s it, thanks.
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