ARE YOU WEARING? # 9

ARE YOU WEARING A SCARF?

Are you wearing a scarf?
Well it’s not a cold night
And it doesn’t match your outfit
It just doesn’t look right
Why are you wearing it?
I know you’ve got a love bite

ARE YOU WEARING COLOGNE?

Are you wearing cologne?
You’re wearing “Black Knight”
What is going on?
Something’s not right
Your wearing you’re cologne
And it’s a school night
It’s not your birthday
So you’re not due a delight
It’s definitely not Christmas
I know I have that right
It’s a snow day tomorrow?
Ok turn out the light

ARE YOU WEARING JODHPURS?

Are you wearing jodhpurs?
You have a fine seat you know
No I’ve never seen you ride
But I do like your bum though
You are a handsome filly
Of good pedigree so Tally ho
And if you’re offering me a ride
I wouldn’t mind giving you a go

ARE YOU WEARING A BUN?

Are you wearing a bun?
That will cause some chat
It’s just a bit old fashioned
But there’s nothing wrong in that
The biggest problem you have
Is it makes your face look fat

ARE YOU WEARING BALLET SHOES?

Are you wearing ballet shoes?
Not really suitable attire,
If you don’t mind me saying,
For working on the farm squire

ARE YOU WEARING TRAINER SOCKS?

Are you wearing trainer socks?
Tell me that you are Please do
Say you haven’t put an uncovered foot
Inside that sweaty training shoe

ARE YOU WEARING SOCKS?

Are you wearing socks?
Tell me that you are, pray
Why must you adopt
The most bohemian way
And be quite sock less
On your wedding day

ARE YOU WEARING PIG TAILS?

Are you wearing pig tails?
Well that look never fails
To make you look, as a rule,
Like you’re still at school

ARE YOU WEARING A WAISTCOAT?

Are you wearing a waistcoat?
Well it certainly gets my vote
Though some might disapprove
And it falls on me to behove
To say without being uncaring
It’s the only thing you’re wearing

ARE YOU WEARING A FEATHER BOA?

Are you wearing a feather boa?
It makes you look like a goer
And I think that is a no noa
You don’t need any help so soa
You can loose the feather boa