SANTA CLAUS LOVES CHRISTMAS

 

Santa Claus loves Christmas

It’s his favourite time by far

And that’s because he knows

Where all the naughty girls are

SANTA ASKED ABIGAIL

 

Santa asked as a little girl climbed onto his lap,

"And what would you like for Christmas Abigail?"

The child stared at him open mouthed with horror

And then she snapped "Didn't you get my E-mail?"

IT’S ONE OF LIFE’S INEVITABILITIES

 

It’s one of life’s inevitabilities that there will

Definitely come a time in every family residence

A moment when the children notice that Santa

Uses the same wrapping paper as their parents

TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS # 1

 

Twas the night before Christmas and all thru the house,

Not a creature was stirring not even a mouse

As earlier that night with the aid of cheese and a trap

I bad Mr. Mouse Merry Christmas as the spring went snap

YOU CAN KEEP THE SLEIGH # 1

 

You can keep the sleigh

And Rudolph and Prancer

There’s nothing Santa likes

More than a Lap Dancer

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 295

 

Solomon Grundie,

Born on Monday,

But nothing else

In his life rhymed

ARE YOU WEARING CHRISTMAS HOSIERY?

 

Are you wearing Christmas hosiery?

Phwor are you going to let me see

Oh, how they cling to the shape of you

I would like to cling to them too

Oh yes, I like them very much

Perhaps I might have a touch

Oh, you are a proper tease

Would you let me if I said please?