LIP-SALVE

 

Lip-salve is a very useful product

But it’s not a good chaperon, in anyway

Even though it lives up to its boast

Of always keeping the chaps away

FOR MANY YEARS HE HADN’T DONE MUCH

 

For many years he hadn’t done much

In the way of work at all

Not that he was physically incapable

He just worked at county hall

IT WILL NORMALLY INVOKE A SENSE OF SHAME

 

It will normally invoke a sense of shame

When a young lady to loses her good name

However, her position is not an untenable one

When a young man gives her a better one

MY COUSIN IS AN ORTHODONTIST

 

My cousin is an orthodontist

In the American deep south

I don’t think he’s happy, as he

Always looks down in the mouth

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 374

 

Jack and Jill went up the hill

To do what they shouldn’t’ve oughter

Now she has a dose of chlamydia

And Jack has trouble passing water

THE ST VALENTINE’S DAY MASSACRE

The St Valentine’s Day massacre

That was a bloody occasion

Which just shows what happens

If you don’t make a reservation

ARE YOU WEARING LEDERHOSEN?

Are you wearing lederhosen?

Well, that’s a look you could lose

And they make your buttocks squeak

Like a pair of new shoes