Wednesday, 18 January 2023

WHINGING HOLIDAY MAKERS # 2

 

We had a terrible holiday

It was ruined by drunken pests

Our tour operator should have

Warned us of noisy unruly guests

WHY DID THE FUGITIVE CROSS THE ROAD?

 

Why did the fugitive cross the road?

Well not just to get to the other side

The reason he wanted to cross over

Was so he could find somewhere to hide

ARE YOU WEARING WINKLE PICKERS?

 

Are you wearing winkle pickers?

And you don’t mind the snickers?

And when they ask it doesn’t offend?

“Do your toes go right to the end?”

YOU KNOW YOU HAVE REACHED

You know you have reached

The end of your childhood

When knock down ginger is bad

And afternoon naps are good

THE SIMPLE DEFINITION OF MARRIAGE

 

The simple definition of marriage

I think you should understand

Is that one person is always right

And the other one is the husband

I WAS LITTLE MORE THAN A LAD

 

I was little more than a lad

And my hometown lay behind me

But I didn’t walk the road

As a lad for very long,

I quickly became a man

So I walked for many years

And for many miles

In country and in town

Working in the sweet-smelling fields

And the foul odorous cities

But I wandered tall and proud

Now the road lead me home

And the path breathes life

Into my wistful heart

THE RUSSIAN AIRFORCE ARE DROPPING

 

The Russian Airforce are dropping

Amazon bombs on Syria

They are so called as they keep

Being left with a neighbour