WHEN I HAD MY VERY FIRST GARDEN

 

When I had my very first garden

It filled me with absolute terror

I didn’t have any experience

But I learnt by trowel and error

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 347

 

Georgie Porgie, Puddin' and Pie,

Kissed the girls and made them cry

Until the day that it came to be

He was investigated by Yew Tee

WHINGING HOLIDAY MAKERS # 1

 

We went on a self-catering

Luxury break in Bognor  

But the fully equipped kitchen

Didn’t have an egg separator

WHY DID THE VOYEUR CROSS THE ROAD?

 

Why did the voyeur cross the road?

Well not just to get to the other side

The reason he wanted to cross over

Was so he could find somewhere to hide

FOGHORN LEGHORN’S WIFE ONLY LAID

 

Foghorn Leghorn’s wife only laid

Her eggs in the winter or fall

But that made sense, as she was

No Spring Chicken after all

THERE IS AN OWL OF LOW MORALS

 

There is an Owl of low morals

That frequents our park

And subsequently it doesn’t

Give a hoot after dark

AMONG ABOMINABLE SNOWMEN

 

Among abominable snowmen

There is a virgin called Betty

And to all her kith and kin

She is known as a not Yeti