YOU HAVE A REALLY DAZZLING SMILE # 2

 

You have a really dazzling smile

But teeth shouldn’t be that white

Is it because you run them thru

The dishwasher at night

SHE WAS AN OLD LONELY WIDOW # 1

 

She was an old lonely widow

Oft overlooked to be fare

When an elderly friend

Saw her standing there

And walked up behind her

And got his hands on her pair

“Guess who?” The old man said

She replied “I don’t care”

RAMBLING

 

My wife suddenly announced

“I’ve decided to become a rambler”

Now was that walking or talking

An even money bet for a gambler

MY WIFE HAS WOMEN’S INTUITION

 

My wife has women’s intuition

So well-tuned is her technique

That she knows I’m wrong

Even before I manage to speak

THESE AREN’T WRINKLES

 

“These aren’t wrinkles” she said

“They’re laughter lines honey”

I said “I didn’t hear the joke,

But it must have been really funny”

HIS MOUSTACHE WAS SO UNTIDY

 

His moustache was so untidy

It was quite difficult to see

Exactly where it grows,

On his lip or from his nose

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 219

Thirty days hath September,

April, June and November;

But the rest of the rhyme

I can never remember