I had a phone call from the doctor
“Your cheque came
back” I heard him shout
I gathered myself for
a moment
Then replied, “So did
my bloody gout”
Tuesday, 17 May 2022
DOCTORED ACCOUNT # 2
SINCE THE BBC SACKED ALL THE DALEKS # 2
Since the BBC sacked all the Daleks
Most are just scrounging off the state
But there is one working at our uni
He doesn’t really communicate
And it scares a lot of the students
When it says “Extrapolate, Extrapolate”
I DON’T TRUST A MAN
“I don’t trust a man”
(Normally that says it
all)
That goes for most of
them
“But I don’t trust a
man”
Who doesn't close his
eyes
When I kiss him”
YOU DO NOT SUFFER FROM FALSE MODESTY
You do not suffer from false modesty
That is clear for even
the blind to see
But if ever there was
a truth that mattered
Its, don’t interrupt when you’re being flattered
THEY SAY YOU SHOULD APPROACH LOVE
They say you should approach love
And cooking with the
same reckless abandon
Well, I’ve seen my
girlfriend make an omelette
So, I don’t think I
need to go on
MY TACTIC
My tactic, come bedtime
At the said time
Is to pull your night
gown
Right down
Because there is no
headroom
In your bedroom
I’M A GRADUATE OF YALE
I’m a graduate of Yale
A name you can trust
Though I am not
elitist
I can still do Chubb
if I must
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