Little Jack Horner sat in the corner
Of a fashionable eatery
When his food arrived
in its design contrived
He said, “What’s this
supposed to be?”
Thursday, 3 February 2022
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 8
HAPPY BIRTHDAY # 4
If you were a wheel of cheese
You would certainly be
mature
But face it you’re a
wrinkly
And no longer a force
of nature
PUT DOWN # 7
Put downs work the best
For deflecting
unwanted attention
But try to be amusing
As this relieves the
tension
If he says to you
“Can I buy you a
drink, honey?”
Just reply to him
“I'd rather have the
money”.
POSITIVE DISCRIMINATION
It’s about time we realised
Discrimination is
futile
Between black and
white
Muslim, Jew and
gentile
The old and the young
The homeless and the
cherished
The left and the right
The perfect and the
blemished
Atheists and believers
The contented and the
whinger
Able bodied and
disabled
Brunette blonde and
ginger
The east and the west
From Asian Orientals
Continent against
continent
To European
Occidentals
The happy and the sad
The skinny and the stout
The stable and the mad
The in and the out
The north and the
south
The Oxbridge and the
common
The straight and the
gay
Man versus woman
At the end of the day
Nature will
discriminate
And will eliminate
Those perpetrators of
hate
The senseless bigots
And the world will be
rid
As nature will choose
Between the smart and
the stupid
HOSPITAL DUDE
The coolest dude at the hospital
Is the ultra sound guy
But when he is on
holiday
It’s the hip
replacement guy
THE ANGEL OF THE NORTH
The angel of the north
Standing tall and
erect
That androgynous
monument
To the politically
correct
Disproportionate in
aspect
On a hill it was put
But it has sunk in the
ground
To the depth of a foot
Definitely no room
For complacency though
As there are still
another
Sixty-five feet to go
PC COFFEE TIME
Black coffee
That’s all I crave
Nothing fancy
Just coffee, black
Not latte
Skinny or otherwise
Not espresso
Cappuccino
Mocca
Mocca choca
Macchiato,
Americano
Just coffee, black
But now I’m told
It’s not PC
To order black coffee
Apparently
To be perfectly PC
When ordering black
coffee
I must request
Coffee without milk
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