KEEP FAT

My wife keeps telling me

I must get fit you see

I tell her I am already in shape

Because Round IS a shape

LILLIE AND GOLDIE

In the garden little Lillie

Was digging with great Endeavour

When she was spotted by Mrs. Gish

Her very nosy neighbor

 

Mrs. Gish leant on the fence

And asked, “What are you doing Lillie"?

“My goldfish Goldie died

So I’m digging a hole to bury it, see”?

 

“You silly little girl” she replied

That hole is far too big for a goldfish

Smiling Lillie looked up and said

“Not when it’s inside your cat Mrs. Gish”

MOMENTS

A Life is merely moments

Interconnected

Like the links of a chain

Just moments

Some fleeting

Some lingering

Sometimes singular

Sometimes strung together

One upon another

To make experiences

In turn making a life whole

Life consists only of moments

Moments that comfort

Moments that elate

Moments of sadness

Moments of joy

Moments of pain

Moments of ecstasy

Moments to cherish

Some moments are finite

Others radiate through a life

Like ripples on a pond

Left by a rising fish

Others remain rooted in the past

Becoming distant memories

Yet some are perfect moments

And are easily recalled

In perfect clarity

You are my most precious moments

NATURAL MUSIC

Bird song abounds like a symphony

Scripted by natures unseen composer

Conducted by the baton of an invisible maestro

The shrill woodwinds

Of Blackbirds, Finches, Thrush and the Tit family

While the Cuckoo sets the time

And a Woodpecker beats a rhythm

The breeze moves the leafy canopy

Like vibrant cascading strings

Timber’s creek and strain adding percussion

Rutting Stags and distant plaintive cries

A Fox cry and a Peacock’s call

Waterfowl and cooing Doves

Underscored by the beating wings of birds in flight

Insects join the improvised symphony

Droning Bees and Dragonfly

A symbol crash as a Duck enters the water

A waterfall adds the rolling kettle drum

Distant thunder booms like a bass drum

And Xylophonic drops of rain hit the lake

While a Swan gracefully dances

Across the water in perfect harmony

God in heaven the impresario

Of mother nature’s philharmonic company

PANTING FOR IT

If there is a man in your bed

Gasping for breath, calling your name

And beginning to swoon

This obviously means you silly girl

You took the pillow off his face

A minute too soon

Uncanny Tales – (57) I Saw You in a Different Light Today

 I saw you in a different light today as you walked through the village of Dulcet Green when for first time you were a dazzling light of femininity, not the normal little tomboy in the cargo pants and baggy T-shirt.

The usual beaten up old trainers had been replaced by four inch heels which shaped those normally concealed legs, whose black clad debut couldn’t fail to appeal.

The sheer black of your stocking sheathed limbs that disappeared beneath the tailored hem of a skirt that fitted your hitherto, unknown curves, accentuating glorious hips, shapely thighs and of course well rounded buttocks, and tucked into the tiniest of waistbands was a crisp white blouse tailored to fit your ample treasures, once well buried, and buttoned at the wrist and open at the neck, three buttons undone so that it gaped to show it contents to perfection.

ARE YOU WEARING HALLOWEEN DRAWERS?

 Are you wearing Halloween drawers?

I would like a look at yours

I bet a pound to a penny

You’re not wearing any

There we have it at last

You are as I thought bare arsed

Of course it makes you look loose

Even if you have an excuse

Well yes it would be regarded as a treat

And not just down your street