An Antidote To Writers Block (Part 01) The Taking Of Georgia

My name is Simon Fisher and I’m a writer of sorts and I’m sitting in front of my laptop staring at an open page in Word headed “An Untitled Novel by Simon Fisher” below it is one other word “The” followed by a space and the pulsing cursor irritatingly waiting for more, but if I give it more, it will, like some crazed addict, just keep demanding more it will never be satisfied.
If you hadn’t already guessed I have reached a hiatus in my writing career more commonly referred to as writers block.
It hadn’t always been like this, I’ve had some success in the field modest though it might be, and I wrote two novels which were successful, one stage play very well received and several screenplays perhaps less so.
This early flourish had at least provided me with a reasonable return and gave me something of a nest egg. But, why was there always a, but? But, my early success had petered away.
Luckily I didn’t go all Diva on my way up and have been able to survive on the good will of friends and acquaintances on the way down.
I milked all my contacts from Uni and the wider publishing world and picked up as many gigs as I could, a column here an essay there.
My literary agent was worse than bloody useless so we parted company I had a prolonged spell as an Agony Aunt which was most enlightening and I even had a three month stint as an Astrologer writing Horoscopes for a provincial publication while the regular numpty, Roxanne, went travelling to the East to find herself.
That gig ended when she returned after finding herself in Great Yarmouth.
I did everything to try and break the block, I even moved to London in an effort to immerse myself in its vibrant and colourful landscape with the hope that it might stimulate my writers bent.
But I just ended up getting pissed a lot.
So I had reached the fulcrum, I was 29 years old staring into the abyss of my thirties and the money I had accrued from my successful phase as an Author was now running dry.
I had a stark choice to make, firstly I could move to the states and join the swelling number of University graduates already there and try to compete with the fertile minds of those unconstrained by my affliction.
Second I could give up writing and get a proper job, a teacher maybe or God forbid an editor.
Or thirdly my personal favourite, pray hard so I could just shake the writers block.
As luck would have it fate took a hand and I didn’t have a decision to make.
My Uncle John died on New Years Day and left me his Cottage and a small cash sum more than enough to keep me going for a few more years.
I think he left it to me because he felt we were kindred spirits I really liked him, it was his tales of alcohol-induced debauchery that helped me when I was writing my novels.
His death was sudden though not unsurprising given his life style
So that’s how I found myself living in the quaint English village of Bushy Down in a lovely Victorian Cottage.
It’s a very tranquil place though not without its distractions, which you shall hear more of later.
From my study I can look out through the open French windows and across the expanse of lawn to a stand of ancient woodland that separates my garden from the golf course, there is no fence to separate garden and wood the two just merge.
The golf course is kind of the hub of the village, everyone goes there at some point and not just to play golf either there are two excellent restaurants, function rooms, a great bar all open to non members though you had to be a member to play or be the guest of a member.
Furthermore the club is crucial to the story because without it none of the following would have happened.

It was a glorious day at the beginning of May, unseasonably warm and the type of day that England was made for.
There was a big do on at the club to celebrate Pandora Parkinson-Browns 40th birthday, Pandy was the club Captains wife and she was a very popular character and a truly likeable person, as a result of which most of the village were there and subsequently a good deal of alcohol was consumed.
I arrived late at the party by a couple of hours as I’d been away for a few days and as a result I was obviously a good few drinks behind everyone else.
So I made my way to the bar and I was pleased to see the gorgeous Georgia was serving,
Ever since I first met her I’d had a soft spot for Georgie, or at least I fantasized about exploring her soft spot.
She was only just twenty and I later found out she was home for the weekend from Roehampton University where she was studying English and creative writing.
Since my arrival in the village back in January and it being known I was a writer it was perhaps not unsurprising that we would gravitate toward each other.
We had talked many times about her various writing assignments, which were her opportunity to pick my brains on writing issues and my chance to ogle her glorious bod at close quarters.
She was five foot eight with short bobbed brown hair, I’ve always liked a brunette, mesmerizing green eyes and a lovely figure suitably proportioned and all underpinned, excuse the pun, by stunning legs, sorry but I’m unashamedly a leg man.
As she was working the bar that day she was dressed in her uniform of short black skirt and crisp white blouse, always a nice combo, sorry I rather like uniforms as well.
“Hello stranger” She said smiling broadly
“I was beginning to think you weren’t coming”
“Hi George” I replied, “I’ve only just got back from town”
She raised an enquiring eyebrow
“I had to see the solicitor again; they still haven’t completely wrapped up Uncle John’s estate”
She nodded understandingly
“Do you want the usual?”
“Yes please” I replied looking around at my fellow guests “Make it a large one it looks like I have some catching up to do, oh and have one yourself”
“I’ll have one later when I can enjoy it, if that’s ok?” she said as she set a large Gin and Tonic on the counter in front of me.
“No problem”
Just then a large group of punters arrived at the bar demanding her attention.
“I’ll see you later” I said and went in search of the birthday girl.
I was still trying to get to know people at the club but there were still more who were strangers than not.
Pandy however was not one of them she always made a point to make everyone’s acquaintance.
I soon found her, slightly the worse for wear sitting on the terrace surrounded by admirers, not that she realized they were admirers.
“Happy Birthday Pandy” I called
“Simon darling” she said as she shot to her feet and launched herself at me for a rather untidy embrace.
“I’m a bit squiffy” she slurred

By early evening a combination of too much Gin and the heat of the sun had left me a little spinny headed so I decided to call it a day and headed back across the 18th fairway and the woods beyond to the sanctuary of the cottage.
I had just stepped onto the fairway when I was hailed by Emily and Jenny, I turned to see them tottering towards me across the grass shoes in hand ever so slightly tipsy.
The girls were best friends, quite inseparable and very gorgeous but alas they were only 15 even though the kept reminding me they were actually 15 and three quarters, sadly that three quarters was not going to keep me out of jail if I did what I had thought of doing.
But they were both lovely girls and I liked them a lot and not just sexually.
Jenny was the younger of the two by a few weeks, five foot two red hair and pale complexion and cutely freckled while Emily was an inch shorter with Jet-black hair and dark dusky skin.
They were both stunningly beautiful and wearing low cut party dresses they looked even more so.
They tottered up along side me each taking an arm Emily as always was flirting outrageously.
“Can we come back to yours Simon?” Emily said
“The olds won’t let us have another drink”
“Its not like we’re drunk or anything” Jenny chipped in
“Can we?” Emily said again
“Please Simon?” Jenny added
“Ok” I said, “as long as you behave”
“What will you do if we don’t?” asked Emily
“Will you spank us?” Jenny said and giggled
“You’ll get me arrested,” I said
Being over six foot tall and being arm in arm with two girls gave me a height advantage of more than a foot, affording me a wonderful view down the front of their low cut dresses, I know I should be ashamed of ogling school girls breasts but I’m not.
Emily saw me looking at her plump brown tits and giggled so I looked again.
Then I compared them to Jenny’s pair when Emily whispered to her friend what I was doing she blushed scarlet but made no attempt to prevent me looking again.

When we reached the cottage I left the giggling flirts outside while I went inside to change and came out 10 minutes later just wearing an old pair of baggy shorts and I joined the girls as they sat on the patio which was now in the shade and I gave the girls a glass of wine each.
Which on reflection was not the wisest thing to do, Emily kept leaning over me so I could have an unrestricted view of her tits, which was giving me a hard on like a milk bottle. In between glimpses of Emily’s pert jewels they danced around my garden flirting and flaunting and flashing their skimpy knickers whether knowingly or otherwise was immaterial as it was not diminishing the intensity of my erection.
Finally out of breath they tottered over to me breathless to drink their wine and sat their pert arses on my lap while they drank which made my cock throb and my balls ache.
Emily must have been able to feel my dick under her buttock but if she did she didn’t make it known.
Maybe she would reflect on it beneath her duvet that night.
Anyway I decided that it had to stop so I pushed them up onto their feet and simultaneously gave their buttock a little pat but I gave each plump little peach a lingering squeeze and seriously considered shagging the pair of them then and there.
After all they were only a little bit too young but I nobly thought better of it, as I figured perhaps less nobly that in a few months they would be fair game.
“Time to go, before I do something I’ll regret”
“But we’re having fun” Jenny protested
“We don’t mind a bit of sexy fun” Emily said and blushed
Then both girls giggled
“When you’re old enough maybe,” I said reflecting on the time when it would be legal if not immoral to shag their collective brains out then I smacked each of them satisfyingly hard on their firm derrieres causing them to release delightful stereophonic squeals.
Then I sent them on their way. I struggled out of the chair so I could walk them to the woods but the enormity of my erection and my aching balls made getting up and then walking somewhat uncomfortable, fortunately I was wearing the baggy shorts.
The girls were someway in front of me by the time I got to the woods still giggling they turned and waved and Emily blew a kiss.
“You don’t know just how close I came to splitting your whiskers today girls,” I muttered under my breath
“Straight home and take care” I said aloud.

I made my way gingerly back to the cottage and went inside for a piss, which was hellish difficult with a hard on.
I had to lean forward like a ski jumper and I still managed to hit the cistern so I pissed in the shower instead.
By the time I got back to the patio my cock had reduced down to a semi but I still had the lovers balls.
I sat down and poured myself some wine and saw gorgeous Georgia emerge from the woods, I assumed she must have finished work for the day as she had changed out of her uniform and was wearing a lovely yellow summer dress and being the man I am I immediately wondered if her knickers matched which caused me a slight trouser tickle.
“If you’ve finished work come and have that drink”
“Ok I was hoping you’d say that”
She joined me on the patio and I poured her a drink,
“I saw the pretty girls leave” She said, a little bitterly “Everyone really loves the pretty girls”
“Yes” I said thoughtfully “I rather like a pretty girl myself”
She gave me a look and I continued “which is why I asked you in for a drink”
“I’m not pretty,” she snorted
“No, you’re beautiful” I corrected her
She turned her head away coyly.
I put the drinks down on the table put my hand on her chin and turned her face towards me.
“You’re beautiful Georgia”
I was so close to her that her intoxicating perfume enveloped me I moved my hand from her chin and caressed her cheek while I stared into her beautifully hypnotic green eyes, and then I lent in and kissed her.
She immediately responded pressing her mouth hard against mine and darting her tongue in my mouth.
Her arms immediately wrapped around me holding me so tight.
My left hand was on her hip pulling her pelvis towards my now throbbing cock; my right was now on her neck moving quickly to her shoulder.
My other hand moved from her hip up her back and slowly unzipped her dress, the hand on her shoulder pushing the strap of her dress down her arm to the elbow at which point Georgia slipped her arm out, and as the cotton fell away my hand was able to cup her exposed breast.
She sighed and snorted air in deeply through her nose as I toyed with her stiffening nipple between my thumb and forefinger.
I disengaged my mouth from hers and she immediately tried to reattach but I broke away again as I had other plans for my mouth.
Still fondling her breast I started to kiss and nibble down her neck while my other hand slipped her remaining shoulder strap off to expose her other pert little globe.
Which I quickly took hold of with my spare hand.
Briefly I returned my mouth to hers as I fondled both titties playing with her swollen peaks with my thumbs then my mouth went on a journey down her neck, shoulders and chest until I found myself kneeling in from of her and her beautiful firm round tits which I took turns on kissing, licking and sucking. Georgia was trembling, her left hand was on my shoulder, gripping hard and her right was fingering my hair as I sucked her teat.
My hands were now on her knees about to travel north, and as they slid slowly yet purposely upward as if to distract her from my intension I sucked hard on her nipple making her wince, she withdrew and I thought I had hurt her too much but instead she thrust her other teat between my lips for similar treatment and I duly obliged.
My hands meanwhile were nearing their objective and I felt the fabric of her panties beneath my finger tips.
My hands spread out across her firm buttocks squeezing and kneading them until my fingers reached the waistband of her knickers and grasping the elastic firmly I tugged them off her round cheeks and down her trembling thighs releasing them at her knees where gravity took over.
My hands were quickly occupied with her naked arse and I stopped sucking her tits and instead began kissing her quivering belly.
Simultaneously I started edging her backward against the table.
Georgie adjusted her feet, at the same time kicking off her shoes and freeing one foot from her pants,
I was now pushing up the fabric of her dress and kissing her thighs I glanced down briefly to see her knickers loosely hanging around her ankle, which I found for some reason extremely erotic, and I thought to myself “they were yellow then”
As I kissed up her thigh I could smell her odour, which spurred me on, and very soon I was rubbing my face in her ample public curls.
I maneuvered her back further until she could slide her buttocks onto the table to support her weight while I knelt before her I looked up and saw Georgia was biting her lip and then she opened up wide for me to drink deeply of her heady mix of sweat mingled with her juices and pleasured her with my nose, my mouth, my tongue until I could wait no more and I got to my feet and kissed her, her pungent fragrance was all around my mouth and when I stopped kissing her it was all around hers as well and as my hand slipped up her thigh she licked her lips.
I fingered her hot pussy with two fingers of one hand making her moan while I released my cock from its confines with the other.
Then I penetrated her and I felt her hymen break.
I stopped.
"I didn’t know you were a virgin"
I said, still inside her
I’d always assumed she was sexually active she was after all an attractive confident young woman with no shortage of admirers as far as I was aware and she’d been away at University for two years.
"I’m sorry" was her reply
“What for?” I said, my throbbing cock eager to continue
"For not being experienced, for not being any good" she said pulling her dress up to cover her tits
“I’m glad I’m the first” I replied “And I’m going to be second and third”
I pulled her dress back down exposing her gorgeous tits and kissed her
“We will have to discuss your serious self esteem issues in the afterglow”
I said as I gave her a full length, then another then another.
When Georgia came the first time I thought the table was going to collapse so I withdrew from her soaking wet cunny and droplets of her juice dripped off my glistening knob onto the patio
“Please, don’t stop” she entreated
“Don’t worry darling we’ll finish this inside on firmer ground, I don’t think this table will take any more of your passion”
I discarded my shorts and pants and stood before her wearing nothing but her cum.
She stood up and grasped the front of her dress to cover her modesty.
“Let go” I said “You’re beautiful remember”
She opened her hand and her dress fell to the floor, she stepped out of it but still had her yellow panties wrapped round her ankle, she made as if to shake it free but I said
“No leave them, its really sexy”
I held out my hand and she took it in hers and I led her inside and finished the job and when I finally lost my load into her tight young cunny it was like a dam bursting from my pulsating twitching member.

After a prolonged nap I awoke to find Georgia playing with my shaft and kissing and nibbling my ear so I fucked her tight little cunt again before I walked her home.
I had a feeling I would be visiting her delights on a regular basis.

I woke in the early hours with my head buzzing with words and phrases so I got up and went to my study where I opened my laptop, it was still on the same page headed “An Untitled Novel by Simon Fisher” and below it was one other word “The” followed by a space and the cursor pulsing, impatiently awaiting input, almost like it was tapping its foot as it stood ever ready to receive further instructions so I sat down and miraculously I began to type the words and they flowed out of me like a river, no a torrent.
Four hours later I stopped typing but only then because I was hungry and I found I had typed five chapters.
I was euphoric so I ate a hearty breakfast but decided on a hot shower before continuing.
While I was showering I began to think about my sexploits with Georgia the night before and I got a rather spectacular erection.

I returned to my computer having dealt rather satisfyingly with the unexpected erection and the river of words flowed again and I continued to write for the rest of the day and then I only stopped when I caught sight of Georgia coming across the lawn and I got a trouser tickle.

So thanks to two hot schoolgirls and a nubile student my writer’s block was gone, and it would appear I have a penchant for writing erotic novels, bodice rippers and slutty romances.
That knowledge gained from my time as an agony aunt will no doubt become invaluable.
However I decided not to publish under the name of Simon Fisher but rather decided to use a pen name and the one I settled on was Juliana Molesworth, not chosen because the use of a classy name might lend the book some literary weight but because it was the name of the girl who gave me my first blow job.

A Humourous Collection # 12

PHOTOGRAPHIC MEMORY

He was blessed most verily
With a photographic memory
It was never developed sadly

THE HARDER THEY FALL

A universal truth of worth
On which you can truly depend
If they get too big for the britches
They’ll be exposed in the end

FIRST SIGNS OF AGEING

She looked in the mirror
Then she started to cry
She had seen her first grey hair
And she thought she'd dye

ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE - ACUPUNCTURE

When you finish the treatment
You feel like number one
I would certainly recommend it
Acupuncture is a jab well done

CITY OF ANGELS

The smog sits over Los Angeles
On another California day
But when the smog finally lifts
U.C.L.A.

A SEISMIC SHIFT

An eminent professor thought
Her earthquake theory was sound
But soon found her knowledge
Was on very shaky ground

WITH ALL THE TRIMMINGS

With marriage she got a mixture
Of happiness and stress
A husband and a companion
And a new name and a dress

HALLOWEEN COLLECTION

ARE YOU WEARING HALLOWEEN STOCKINGS? # 1

Are you wearing Halloween stockings?
Beneath your long black coat
Are you suitably resplendent?
Will you really float my boat?
Are they risqué and shocking?
Will they easily get my vote?
It could mean a happy Halloween
For a certain horny old goat

HELLO SEXY HALLOWEEN GIRL

Hello sexy Halloween girl
Just one look at you
And how my old heart beats

So tell me sexy Halloween girl
That you have no tricks for me
But you will give me some treats

ARE YOU WEARING A WITCH’S HAT?

Are you wearing a witch’s hat?
I don’t know what I think of that
I will just have to wait and see
If you decide to put a spell on me
I think it might be a thrill
If you were to bend me to your will

ARE YOU WEARING A WITCH’S OUTFIT?

Are you wearing a witch’s outfit?
Does it come with all the kit?
The shoes and cloak and hat
Striped stockings and all that
Then ply me with your potion
And realise your every notion

HELLO DARLING HALLOWEEN GIRL

Hello darling Halloween girl
With your bag half full of sweets
I hope you have no tricks for me
If I top up your bag with treats

ARE YOU WEARING HALLOWEEN GARTERS?

Are you wearing Halloween garters?
Answer me that one for starters
Beneath your dress up high
Around your black clad thigh
Where the black sheath is stopping
Where they are lacy at the topping
Are there pagan garter rings
Sexily placed decorative things
Please answer this one for starters
Are you wearing Halloween garters?

SPIRITUOUS

Pursuing phantoms
Came in the night

From hells realm
Making me take flight

I was so mortally scared
I needed a Bracer

And I quickly followed it
With a Chaser

Though spirituous liquors’
Have their merits

They were no defence
Against evil spirits

ARE YOU WEARING HALLOWEEN KNICKERS?

Are you wearing Halloween Knickers?
Is that appropriate for vicars
Just kneel upon this hassock
While I rummage in your cassock
The bishop wouldn’t think it funny
My naughty little Wiccan honey

ARE YOU WEARING HALLOWEEN TIGHTS? # 1

Are you wearing Halloween tights?
Adorned with a a scary motif
Well if those long festive limbs
Decorated with a spooky motif
Were to entwine about me
Then my resistant would be brief

ARE YOU WEARING DEVILS HORNS?

Are you wearing devils horns?
Now I get one of those winks
You’re wearing the tail as well?
You naughty little minx
You are clearly more devilish
Than anyone else thinks
Is it because it’s Halloween
Or a few too many Drinks

ARE YOU WEARING HALLOWEEN KNICKS?

Are you wearing Halloween knicks?
Proper novelty underwear
All festively decked down below
In a suitably seasonal pair
It doesn’t matter the decor
It will make an old man stare
Just you in your Halloween knickers
What wonderful Witching hour fare

IT WAS HALLOWEEN AND

It was Halloween and
We were on our way to a party
They were both dressed as vampires
And I was Professor Moriarty

We stopped at the supermarket
But didn’t have any cash
So we thought we’d steal some booze
Then make a dash

The bottles we wanted
Were on the very top of the racks
Which we couldn’t reach
So I had to stand on their backs

Once I had the bottles
Dracula hid them under his cape
And without drawing attention
We casually made our escape

But we were caught on CCTV
A very clear image by all accounts
I was charged with shoplifting
On two counts

ARE YOU WEARING HALLOWEEN HOSIERY?

Are you wearing Halloween hosiery?
Phwor are you going to let me see
Oh how they cling to the shape of you
I would like to cling to them too
Oh yes I like them very much
Perhaps I might have a touch
Oh you are a proper tease
Would you let me if I said please?

ARE YOU WEARING HALLOWEEN TIGHTS? # 2

Are you wearing Halloween tights?
Oh how they are exciting me
Adorned with a festive motif
What a Halloween this will be

ARE YOU WEARING HALLOWEEN STOCKINGS? # 2

Are you wearing Halloween stockings?
With a wicked witch motif
Along those long festive garlands
How I wish to trace each relief
Along each luscious limber leg
An ascent exquisitely brief
To reach the Halloween treat
Beyond the wicked witch motif
ARE YOU WEARING HALLOWEEN DRAWERS?

Are you wearing Halloween drawers?
I would like a look at yours
I bet a pound to a penny
You’re not wearing any
There we have it at last
You are as I thought bare arsed
Of course it makes you look loose
Even if you have an excuse
Well yes it would be regarded as a treat
And not just down your street

NO MANS LAND

No mans land,
A desolate place
An unforgiving place
Where stout hearts
Chill and falter
To glimpse at hell

Doom awaits us there
On that alien field
Where death falls like rain
In shrapnel shards
And bullets speak
Of whispered demise

No mans land,
A desolate place
Where men drown
In mud, blood and tears
Blood shed for country
Tears shed for kin

THERE’S NOTHING LIKE A PANCAKE

There’s nothing like a pancake
With lemon curd spread on
And no greater disappointment
When it turns out to be Dijon

THE DOVE OF PEACE

The dove of peace
Flying on lordly wings
Delivered an olive branch
Which delivered the world

A Little Sport

I LIKE THE SPORTING BANTER

I like the sporting banter
Surrounding sporting Rivalry
But there is a fine line
Separating it from tribalry

GOLF MODE

A man got on the bus
And sat down next to Bimbette
He smiled warmly at her
And briefly their eyes met

Full of golf balls
His bulging front trouser pockets
Caught her attention
Her eyes almost left their sockets

He said "its golf balls."
And Bimbette said “Oh”
Then continued, "Does it hurt
As much as tennis elbow?"