It was early Sunday afternoon when I awoke; Andrea was still asleep in bed beside me.
I leant over and kissed her neck and as she stirred I cuddled up behind her.
I must have dozed off again pressed up close behind her and when I woke again her shoulders were shaking,
“Are you crying” I asked
“Yes” she sobbed
“Why?” I asked “what’s wrong?”
“We did a terrible thing” she replied
“It’s was a sin”
“Didn’t it make you feel good?” I asked
“Yes of course it did” she snapped “that just makes it all the more sinful”
“We did something we’d wanted to do for 15 years” I pointed out “it’s not like we rushed into it blindly”
“I know but I still feel guilty” Andrea said “I always feel guilty, whenever I fall from grace I feel like this”
Then almost as an after thought she continued
“Not that I do it often, I’m not a tart”
“I never thought for a moment you were” I reassured and thought for a minute before I continued
“You have spent your whole life denying yourself, a life spent helping others, putting others first, do you really think God would punish you, a good person, a godly person, for once in a while, doing something that makes your toes curl and your eyes roll back in your head”
Then I went on
“If for no other reason than to prove you are still alive”
She just lay there silently but grasped my hand in hers and putting it to her lips she kissed it.
And we drifted off to asleep again in that position.
I’m not sure how long I’d slept but when I awoke I was surprised and delighted to find Andrea was playing with my cock with one hand while the other one frigged her pussy.
“Mmmmm” she sighed as I kissed her neck and my hand crept up and fondled her breast, she wasn’t enormously well endowed but her nipples were huge and stiff, and as fat as my little finger.
Her areolas were incredibly sensitive and she squirmed and fidgeted as I toyed.
Her fingers were still busily employed between her lips as my hand moved down her belly to replace them with my own.
“Mmmmm” she acquiesced as my fingers crept closer and closer, arriving first at the thick tangle of pubic hair, a brief pause and then they were awash in her hot juice, slipping and sliding between her lips and I thought my little fallen angel had not toiled in vain by anyone’s standards her pussy was incredibly wet.
Her hand was still on my cock as her head craned back towards me so her animal moans filled the room as I frigged her until she came.
Her other hand with fingers still moist from her frigging reached between her legs and grabbed my cock from its partner and thrust it roughly into her hot cunny.
Once I was well inside her pussy she gripped the headboard with one hand to brace herself so she could thrust down onto my advance as I banged into her over and over, she was moaning then through gritted teeth until she went rigid and screamed as I shot until I was dry.
“Mmmmm” Andrea murmured as she relaxed in my arms, and there we lay, at peace in the after glow, me still inside her, until we went to sleep again.
When we eventually emerged from my bed we went downstairs and I cooked us a fried breakfast, I called it breakfast because I didn’t know what to call a fry up at 4 in the afternoon.
Whatever the proper name was we devoured it heartily.
After our repast and as we had completely slept through the Sunday service and sinned our way through matins we thought we should at least make a concerted effort to attend the evening service.
So Andrea went up to have a bath while I cleared up in the kitchen.
As Andrea was soaking in the tub I did for a moment at least entertain the thought that I might join her there but in the end I jumped in the shower.
I was sitting downstairs in the lounge wearing my Sunday best when Andrea walked in wearing her best “Sunday go to Meeting” outfit and she looked lovely.
“What do you think” she asked “Do I look suitably chaste like a Christian Missionary or like a fallen woman with a satisfied look on her face?”
“Oh I think you look like a Christian Missionary with a satisfied look on her face” I replied
“That will suffice then” she said with a smile
I had never attended the Sunday Evening service at St Lucy’s so I wasn’t sure what to expect but when we walked in there was a surprisingly large congregation.
I rather enjoyed it; there was no sermonizing it was all songs and psalms.
Reverend Oliver asked Andrea if she would do a reading and a brief talk about her Missionary work and at the end of the service the collection plate was pledged to the Mission.
Once we got home, Andrea having reconnected with God at St Lucy’s, reconnected with me in my bed.
The next morning we rose early, well I always rose early and I gave Andrea the benefit of it before she got up for a shower.
The reason for the early start was that the redoubtable Ms Goodman was collecting her in the Morris Minor at 8 o’clock and whisking her away.
Andrea was only in the UK until December and she had a fairly hectic schedule taking her all round the country giving talks to raise awareness and hopefully some much needed funds.
I for my part had found one charitable recipient for the royalties from the Overend project.
And should that fall flat then I would pay from my own pocket.
One thing Andrea said to me was that I should give more of my self and she gave me a look that said “you give too much of that already”
“If everyone gave one hour a week, what I change could be made to the world”
I wasn’t sure what difference I could make but since Gerald Overend’s death and his wife’s long absence from the village I had temporarily stepped in to fill the breech, as a result I have found myself involved in more and more events and activities and I was really enjoying it.
And furthermore I did freely and without precondition, I certainly wasn’t going to redeem myself in the eyes of God no matter what I did but that was no reason not to something.
I reflected upon the weekends events as I soaked in the bath and despite my having notched up yet another betrayal I felt very pleased with myself.
By 10 am I was on the first tee with my usual partners in crime, Victoria, Judith and Pandora and we spent a pleasant day, in congenial company trying to beat the common enemy, the golf course.
At the nineteenth hole the evidence of our score cards told that on that day we all came out on top.
We were in high spirits as we sat in the bar celebrating our days work, all the while knowing that on another day we would be drowning our sorrows.
I was on my third drink when my phone rang I wrestled it from my pocket and accepted the call.
“Hello?” I said
“It that Simon?” a female voice asked
“Yes, Simon Fisher here” I said rather pompously
“Hi Simon, its Tilly” she said
“Oh hi” I said rather feebly
“Listen I have made some progress on the recordings, do you want to come in and see what a genius I am?” she asked
“Yes I’d love to” I replied “I don’t often get the opportunity to spend time with a genius” I was looking at my companions who all made very un-lady like gestures at me,
“That’s great” she said “how about tomorrow afternoon, lets say 3 o’clock?”
“Perfect” I said “I look forward to seeing you then”
I disconnected and returned my attentions to my companions who were all mimicking me in conversation.
“True geniuses” I said
The next afternoon I was on my way to the station so I made my obligatory visit to Mahajak’s but Shula was nowhere to be seen and there was only Anjuli in the shop and she was talking on the phone.
So I paid for my paper and left the shop.
Just as I was entering the station I spotted Geoff Gregory coming the other way.
“Hi Geoff” I called
“Hello Simon” he said a little distracted
“Is everything ok?” I asked I could tell he was not so I added
“Have you got time for a coffee?”
We sat at a table with our paper cups of over priced coffee and he said
“I’m worried about Georgia”
“Georgie?” I said surprised “Why?”
“She’s cut her self off from us” he said with real concern
“Is it drugs?”
Then he put his cup to his lip but without drinking he continued
“Do you think its drugs?”
Still he didn’t drink
“I think its drugs”
He took a sip this time and pulled a face before lowering the cup and pushing it away form him.
“Of course she’s not on drugs” I assured him “she’s to sensible for that”
I looked at him earnestly
“You and Laura have raised her well”
He didn’t look reassured
“She just needs to focus for the next few weeks and then she’s over the summit”
“We miss her” he said “I miss her”
“l caught Laura crying again this morning” he added
“I miss her too” I said truthfully
I think he was in a slightly better frame of mind when I left him and so was I.
As luck would have it a train pulled in just as I walked through the barrier, I got in the nearest carriage and made myself comfortable, Just as the train was leaving the platform my phone bleated at me informing me that I had a text.
I fished it out of my pocket and I saw it was from Georgie.
I selected read message immediately and it said
“SOS I miss you”
It threw me into a panic, I had just spent 20 minutes reassuring Geoff everything was ok and then I get a text to say that it was clearly not.
After a few moments I replied
“I’m on my way”
Once I’d arrived in Kiddingstone I bought another ticket and waited for the train that would set me on the journey that would eventually lead to Roehampton.
While I waited on the platform I phoned Sound Bite
“Sound Bite Studio” the tinny disinterested voice said
“Hi, can I speak with Tilly please?” I asked
“Name?” she demanded
“Simon Fisher” I replied
Then without warning the line suddenly went dead.
Then a moment later
“Hi Simon” Tilly said cheerfully
“Tilly? I’m so sorry but I can’t make it today” I said “a family emergency, can we reschedule?”
“Yes of course” she said “I’m sorry to hear you can’t make it, nothing serious I hope”
“No nothing serious” I confirmed
“It will have to be the end of next week” Tilly explained “I have to fly to Frankfurt tomorrow night”
“How about next Wednesday then” I suggested stepping aboard the train.
“Fine I’ll see you then, bye”
When I reached Roehampton station I hailed a cab and headed to Georgia’s digs.
After paying my fare I walked up to the front door and rang the bell.
The door was opened by one of the housemates, Alison.
“Hi Ali” I said
“Hello Simon” she replied “Go straight up, She’s in her room”
I made my way up the stairs and went straight to Georgia’s door and knocked twice.
“Come in” she called and I opened the door.
And when I looked in I saw Georgia wearing the lovely yellow summer dress she had worn on that hot day in May when I first made love to her, and being the kind of man I am I immediately wondered if she was wearing the bra and knickers from that day as well.
“Hello gorgeous” I said and smiled
“Oh Simon” she said and threw herself into my arms.
“I’m so sorry Simon” she said and started to cry “but I missed you”
“Don’t cry hon” I said, but it didn’t help
She was sobbing hard on my shoulder and I could feel her tears soaking my shirt.
I felt rather useless and just held her to me and made encouraging noises.
Eventually she calmed down enough so she could explain what was wrong.
“The work is going really well” she said and forced a smile
“And I’m really confident that I’m ahead of the curve”
Then she started to cry again
“I’m sorry Simon, but I just miss everyone so much, I miss talking to mum”
“Then why didn’t you call her?” I said
“Because it was my idea” she replied “and everyone is sticking to it without a problem”
“Everyone else is missing you like crazy” I said and I told her about meeting Geoff that day and about him catching her mum crying.
And she burst into tears again.
Georgia had been in turmoil, she had wanted to call but was afraid of breaking our agreement, afraid of being a quitter when it was her idea.
She wanted to be strong and independent.
When I had calmed her down I persuaded her to phone her mum and dad, persevering with the isolation was just making her unhappy.
If keeping focused on her studies was paramount she could still stay in Roehampton until Christmas but she needed to phone Geoff and Laura regularly.
Georgie dialled the number and waited
“Hi mum it’s Georgie” and then the tears flowed unrestrained
After the phone call Georgia looked across at me with a smile on her tear stained face.
“I love you” she said and walked over to me and kissed me
“I love you too” I responded and kissed her back.
“So why are you wearing the yellow summer dress in November?” I asked “why do you even have it with you?”
She hugged me tightly and hid her face from me.
“I have it with me because it reminds me of that day” she said “and I wear it when I’m lonely”
We stood there holding each other for about five minutes when she finally broke the silence.
“The answer is yes, I am”
“What was the question?” I asked puzzled
“Is she wearing the yellow panties” Georgie answered
“Then lets make some more memories” I suggested
“Yes” she said looking at me coyly.
“You’re so beautiful Georgia”
I breathed in her intoxicating perfume as it enveloped me and I kissed her.
She immediately responded pressing her mouth hard against mine and darting her tongue in my mouth.
Her arms were still wrapped around me, holding me so tight.
My hand moved from the small of her back up to between her shoulder blades and slowly unzipped her dress.
Still kissing me she released her grip on me and stepped backwards to allow the front of her cotton dress to fall forwards exposing her breasts.
I cupped one of her titties in my hand relishing the weight of it and she sighed, then as I toyed with her stiffening nipple between my thumb and forefinger she snorted air in deeply through her nose.
I disengaged my mouth from hers and she immediately tried to reattach but I broke away again as I had other plans for my mouth and I started to kiss my way down to her nipple which I instantly consumed, Georgia was trembling as I sucked her teat just like she did that first time.
All the while tugging at the folds of cottons and dragging the cloth over her hips and leaving that special dress in a heap around her ankles.
Now with Georgia wearing only those sexy yellow panties I stood up and she began undressing me and when she had finished I carried her to her bed and we made love like it was the first time having removed her from the yellow dress and underwear from the day of her desecration and we fell asleep in each others arms.
It was a funny day beginning when I awoke with Andrea in my bed and ended with me falling asleep with Georgia in hers, such was the complicated web I had woven.
Wednesday, 5 December 2012
An Antidote To Writers Block (Part 38) The Missionary Position
The morning after a very memorable remembrance Sunday We were in the kitchen wearing only bathrobes eating scrambled eggs on toast and drinking chocolate milk, how decadent is that?
After we’d finished eating I cleared the plates away while Dakota sat finishing her milk shake.
As I walked back to the table she said
“Thank for letting me stay last night”
“My pleasure” I replied and leant over and kissed her bald head,
“Mine as well” she said looking up at me and smiling as she undid the belt on my robe.
Dakota reached inside and she began gently tugging on me before I felt delicate soft kisses on my sensitive knob as her tongue flicked around my helmet in quick feather light licks.
All at once in one smooth slurping instant I was in her mouth.
I looked down to see the bald head rising and falling on my cock and I was taken back to my childhood when I watched the Star Trek movie with my dad.
Dad is a huge Star Trek fan, and we watched all the films together
And in the first one Persis Khambatta played Lieutenant Ilia, a bald alien officer on the Enterprise and one of my adolescent fantasies was to look down on her bald head as she went down on me and there I was.
I could feel Dakotas fingers still caressing my shaft gently and
I looked down just as my glistening wet knob reappeared accompanied by a sucking sound, she looked up and smiled lustfully before she devoured me again with her hot mouth,
I could see the bulge of my cock in her cheek as she sucked on me.
I was caressing the back of her head and was fast approaching the point of no return so I pulled out of her mouth to the sound of lip smacking and slurping.
“I think we need to redeploy this little soldier,” I said looking down at my saliva soaked cock
“Yes sir” Dakota said standing to attention and throwing an exaggerated salute.
I have to admit I was a little sad when Dakota drove away in the back of a cab.
She was being deployed to foreign soil and it was not inconceivable that I might never see her again.
Her destination though not disclosed would be fraught with dangers; she could be blown up by an IED, ambushed by insurgents or shot by one of her own allies.
All I had to worry about was Georgia catching me wetting my balls with another woman; admittedly it could get more dangerous if she knew the owner of the beaver I was attending to.
But that was not on a parallel with Dakotas prospects.
I spent the next few days writing a rather lengthy piece on the perils of soldiering, and the role of a woman in modern warfare.
The hardships and dangers any soldier faces on active service and the impact of friends and loved ones left at home to fret.
It was a modern day tale where the women are going off to war and their men keep the home fires burning.
I thought it worked on several levels and was something of a diversion for me.
Hopefully I could get it published; Gay Gordon wouldn’t be interested unless I steamed it up a bit with some sex scenes.
I wouldn’t be doing that, since I had started work on the Overend tapes I had found a new group of publishers and I was sure one of those would be interested.
On Friday I was staring through the window watching the robust Frankie bent over picking up a pile of leaves, her dungaree’s stretched tight across her well-defined buttocks.
But I was not as is the norm thinking about banging her back door in, not at that precise moment anyway.
I was about to go outside and talk to her when the phone rang.
“Oh shit,” I said reading the caller ID.
“Hi mum, its lovely to hear from you,” I said with as much sincerity as I could muster.
“Hello Simon, every time I phone you, you say that and after all these years you should be getting better at it, but you’re not are you?” she chastised “Listen I’ll get straight to the point”
She liked getting straight to the point and then generally waffled on for an eternity.
“Andrea Devereaux is back in the country, you remember Andrea?”
Andrea was an old family friend; she was actually the daughter of my mum’s best friend Karen.
“Yes of course I do” I replied
“Andrea would like to know if you could put her up for a few days while she’s in the area” Mum continued
“She asked if she could stay here?” I asked
“Well no, I offered on your behalf” she admitted
“She’s back from the missions for about a month, catching up with old friends before she returns to China”
“Of course she can stay” I said shocked
“I seem to remember you were quite taken with her when you younger” she continued
“Yes I was, but that was a long time ago” I agreed
“You will look after her wont you?” she said firmly
“She’s one of the angels”
“I will treat her like a princess” I said
“And don’t let her see any of that filth you laughably call writing” Mum commanded
“Andrea is a holy person”
“Message received and understood” I said obediently
“I will ring in the morning to say what train she will be on; can you meet her at the station?”
“Yes of course”
“Well thank you Simon” she said “I did think you might make a big fuss like the time we asked you if Molly could stay a few days”
“That was different” I said
“And look at you two now; you’re the best of friends”
“Well not so much best friends more like fuck buddies” I thought to myself and said
“Yes we are”
“I’ll call tomorrow then, bye” and she was gone
Well that was interesting, Andrea Devereaux was coming to stay.
Andrea was my first crush and she going to be staying under my roof.
She had a lot to answer for, I got my first stalker thinking about her and I had my first wet dream over Andréa, well not over her obviously, but you get the picture.
And it was Andréa who made the first contributions to my wank bank, no that doesn’t sound quite right either, well anyway,
Andrea was, is, eight years older than me and I was smitten with her, and I think her with me, but nothing happened, apart from a kiss, one single solitary kiss that blew my mind.
But Andrea shied away after that and the relationship was unresolved and whenever we were together the air was always thick with sexual tension.
But she thought it would be a sin if we did anything.
I was too young to know what her issue was with us kissing.
So I used to track her around the house like a stalker hoping to catch her bending over, maybe see a glimpse of thigh, an errant bra strap, and cleavage even.
One memorable day I caught sight of her drying herself and I was rewarded with a tantalizing view of a nipple and a momentary sight of tufty black pubes.
I almost wanked myself to death over those image burned into my adolescent brain.
I wanted her, not that I would have known what to do I still wanted her what ever that meant and I’ve always wanted her I suppose.
Well now I might get my chance.
Just then my mind came back from thoughts of curly black pubes to the present moment and I remembered that I wanted to talk to Frankie.
I rushed to the back door just in time to catch sight of her big round arse disappearing through the side gate.
“Oh shit” I exclaimed
And rushed to the front door to try and catch her before she drove off.
I opened the door just as she was getting in the truck.
“Frankie” I called “Frankie”
She saw me and got out of the van
“Frankie, I’m glad I caught you, I…?”
“No” Frankie said
“No what?” I asked puzzled
“No you can’t have a grope of my jugs I haven’t got time” she said matter of factly.
“But...”
“Or grab my arse”
“But Frankie”
“Or rummage in my pants”
“That’s not what I was going to ask” I said quite hurt
“I want you to lay a new path out in the back garden”
I said quite innocently “because I use the back way a lot”
“Yes I remember”, Frankie said
Just then Maisie appeared from Judith’s garden carrying some tools which she put in the back of the van.
“Hello Simon” she said “what are you after”
What was I after the cheeky mare.
“He wants a path laying” Frankie told her
“I knew laying would come into it somewhere” Maisie said and the pair of them laughed like drains
“What is it with you women? You’re all sex mad” I said defensively
“Talk about the pot calling the kettle black” Maisie said obviously quoting a Victorianism she’d picked up from her landlady
And they both laughed again.
When Frankie finally got control of her self she said
“I’ll pop back later and give you a quote”
Mum phoned on Saturday morning as promised but as it turned out I didn’t need to meet Andrea’s train at the station after all.
The Christian fraternity had rallied round and a rather frumpy middle-aged woman called Miranda Goodman delivered her to my door in her Morris Minor.
I invited them in and the rather frosty Ms Goodman cast an unsatisfactory eye over everything before coldly taking her leave.
I suspected there would be a distinct awkwardness between Andrea and I after all the years that had passed and the unresolved sexual tension the surrounded us, but I was pleasantly surprised.
I got the impression she was just as surprised and she seemed as relaxed I was.
She was still as pretty as I remembered, a few more lines on her face perhaps, and she wore her hair shorter, but she had lost none of her beauty or allure.
She didn’t seem as tall now but that was my memory playing tricks on me she was always 5ft 3”
I couldn’t ascertain her physical dimensions because of the loose shapeless clothes she had on, but my imagination filled in the blanks regarding, a nice arse, great legs, very decent tits and thick black curly pubes.
We spent the rest of the day talking, catching up and reminiscing.
Our paths had been very different since we last met. Hers had been one of pious devotion in the missions while mine could best be summed up as debauchery, pornography and self indulgence.
The years just seemed to have melted away.
“Its very kind of you to put me up” she said “Thank you”
“No problem” I said honestly “Are you hungry?”
“Yes I am rather” she replied
“Ok I’ll give you a quick tour, show you where everything is, and settle you in your room and while you’re freshening up I’ll cook us something” I suggested.
“That would be lovely,” Andrea said with conviction.
“Thank you again”
After I took her up I found myself behaving like my 15 year former self sneaking around trying to catch her in intimate moments and get a glimpse of forbidden flesh.
But I failed, so I went back downstairs to the kitchen.
After we’d eaten we sat and talked some more until after about an hour when she was suddenly overcome with tiredness and had excuse her self.
“I’m sorry” she said “My body clock is all over the place at the moment”
I had to admit I was quite tired myself and the only traveling I had done recently was to Kiddingstone and back, so I turned in as well.
I had to get up for a pee at about 3.00am and I was just getting back into bed when I thought I heard a noise downstairs.
I slipped on my bathrobe and cautiously crept down the stairs.
I could definitely hear someone in the kitchen, I crept to the kitchen door, which was slightly ajar, and then I breathed a sigh of relief.
It was Andrea who was making a hot drink; she was wearing blue and white-stripped pajamas several sizes too big.
The Old fashioned ones with a drawstring around the waist.
So I still couldn’t ascertain her physical dimensions because of the loose fitting PJ’s
However I was delighted to see that the fly had gaped and sprouts of black pubes were clearly visible.
Which excited me very much indeed; the problem was that once I had noticed them I couldn’t take my eyes off of them.
I knew that if I went in the kitchen I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from looking.
But I couldn’t stay in the hall and I couldn’t go back up stairs in case she saw me and I had to explain why I hadn’t wanted to go in the kitchen.
So I tried to put the image out of my head as I pushed open the door.
“Hey Andréa” I said “can’t sleep eh”
“No” she replied, “like I said my body clock is all askew”
I focused my eyes on the cupboards behind her head, and thought to myself
“I must not look, I must not look”
“I thought a hot drink might help” she continued as she checked the milk boiling on the hob.
I wanted to look so badly, and as she turned back towards me I finally gave in and stared at her gaping fly and the pubic hair escaping from it.
Almost the precise moment my eyes fixed on her pussy she looked directly at me and couldn’t help but notice me looking at her black curly pubes and she blushed a brilliant red
“Oh God” she said frantically looking around for something to cover both her embarrassment and her Minge and becoming more and more flustered every second
“I’m so sorry” I said, apologizing for embarrassing her and not being at all sorry for having looked at her errant curly tufts
“Here use this” I added as I handed her a towel
“Oh God” she said again snatching the towel from my hand and covering her snatch.
“I really am sorry” I said feebly as she bustled past me and ran out the door crying
“Oh shit” I said and sat down at the kitchen table.
It was 4.00am and I was still sitting at the kitchen table having drunk two mugs of Milo made with Andrea’s boiled milk.
And I was wide awake and cursing my behaviour.
It was going to make the atmosphere very strained for the next two days
She still couldn’t sleep either as I could clearly hear her in the shower.
I couldn’t believe what had happened, I couldn’t believe what I had done, but to cap it all I still consigned the image to my wank bank.
I was a total pig I thought to myself with my head in my hands.
Just then the kitchen door opened and as I looked up Andrea walked in still wearing the blue and white stripped pajamas.
She was biting her lip and kept looking at the floor, I smiled at her and she gave a half smile back.
And then despite everything that had already happened I had to look, it was just a quick glance at first but then my gaze lingered as to my great surprise the fly hadn’t quite closed completely and delicious sprouts of freshly showered black pubes were clearly visible through the opening and this time it was by design.
She saw me looking at her visible pubes and she knew they were visible.
Andrea blushed a vivid scarlet but made no attempt to conceal them from me as she walked towards me and instead of admonishing me she kissed me.
I couldn’t recall the number of times as a young man I had imagined that kiss as I knocked one out.
And now it had happened and it was just as sensual as I imagined it to be.
Her arms enveloped me as her embrace became more urgent as my left hand settled on her buttock and I got my first hint at the contents of her Old fashioned draw stringed pajamas when her cheek was firm to my touch.
With my left hand engaged fondling her arse there was only one place my remaining hand was going.
I pause briefly at the opening before my finger entered the gape and teased the tufts of damp pubes and though they were damp to the touch as my finger teased her curls I thought they will be much damper in a second.
As they lightly caressed her mound of Venus her kissing paused though her lips were only millimeters from mine as her hot breath fell on my cheek.
In an instant they parted her lips and slipped along her crease,
A roaring moan escaped her lips and her grip tightened around my neck,
My digits returned along her slippery crack before making another greasy descent and extracting another throaty roar from the Andrea.
And almost as an after thought she kissed my cheek.
With each subsequent journey my fingers made along her slippery slit her tone altered.
When I turned my attention to her clitoris her knees began to tremble and her lips were now by my ear so I could hear every fruity moan and murmur as I continued to frig her through the gaping crotch of her jimjams.
As my clitoral stimulation intensified her legs could no longer support her weight,
Her vice like grip around my neck was the only thing that stopped her ending in a heap on the floor.
Then I brought her to climax and she released a long low guttural growl.
I extracted my fingers from her pussy moist with her cunny juice and tugged on the draw string and her pajama bottoms fell quickly to the floor.
Now she was looking at me earnestly, biting her lip, eyes wide and eyebrows raised.
I had wanted her for 15 years and I wouldn’t have to wait much longer.
I couldn’t wait long enough to get her upstairs to have her but I didn’t want her on the kitchen floor or on the table so
I stood up and picking her up in my arms I carried her to the lounge and lay her on the sofa where several virgins had already yielded their cherries’
I looked down at her thick black triangle in stark relief against her alabaster flesh.
Andrea was still biting her lip as I undid the belt on my robe and shrugged it off my shoulders so I was completely naked and her gaze fell immediately on my swollen cock.
I knelt on the floor in front of her and with a hand on each white fleshed knee and pushed them gently apart spreading her wide open until her pink pussy opened invitingly moist amidst the black whiskers.
She drew one knee up and planted her foot against the arm of the sofa while my left hand slid down the outside of her thigh and grabbed her bum cheek I gripped my shaft with my other hand and prodded at the wetness of her with my knob.
She moaned softly, eyes shut, biting her lip
So gripping my cock I pushed my shaft between her dewy lips and I waited to feel the tell tale resistance from her hymen just before her cherry popped and she would be added to the list of the deflowered.
Andrea moaned softly as my helmet breached her hole and then again a little louder as I penetrated deeply into her, but no virginal resistance,
I had convinced myself that Andrea was pure and unsullied, I withdrew and penetrated her again and she wriggled like a fish on a river bank.
It certainly didn’t detract from my enjoyment of her as I gave her another length and she squirmed and wriggled as she received me and then she came.
I hadn’t even got warmed up yet and already she’d come and was creaming my balls.
A few more strokes and she came again, more noisily this time.
Spurred on by her audible appreciation of my efforts I fucked her harder and faster and her arse started to squeak as it rubbed on the leather couch.
As she moaned and writhed beneath me she came for the third time I was getting close to the summit myself and as I quickened my pace on her pussy her utterances were growing higher in frequency and as I reached the threshold of my own conclusion
“Oh Godddd” she screamed and with her writhing sweating body prostrate beneath me I emptied myself into her hot pulsating pussy right there on the leather couch.
Although I had waited 15 years to consummate my first crush and it was everything I could have hoped for and more, it wasn’t quite how I imagined it.
I thought she would be inexperienced, unsure and passive,
But she was none of the above, she was not the shy little angel, a timid innocent, she was a devil in disguise.
She was self-conscious, she was shy, but she didn’t lack confidence once she had determined what she wanted.
It was electrifying.
“I’ve wanted to do that for so many years” I panted as I withdrew from her and she let out a rather smug self satisfied sigh.
“Me too” she confessed
“Do you think you might sleep now?” I asked
“Mmmmm” she replied
“Ok then, do you “A” want to go up stairs and get your pajama jacket off or “B” have a mug of Milo?” I asked as I pulled her up to her feet.
“Well I really like Milo” She answered
“Get upstairs” I said and slapped her bare arse.
After we’d finished eating I cleared the plates away while Dakota sat finishing her milk shake.
As I walked back to the table she said
“Thank for letting me stay last night”
“My pleasure” I replied and leant over and kissed her bald head,
“Mine as well” she said looking up at me and smiling as she undid the belt on my robe.
Dakota reached inside and she began gently tugging on me before I felt delicate soft kisses on my sensitive knob as her tongue flicked around my helmet in quick feather light licks.
All at once in one smooth slurping instant I was in her mouth.
I looked down to see the bald head rising and falling on my cock and I was taken back to my childhood when I watched the Star Trek movie with my dad.
Dad is a huge Star Trek fan, and we watched all the films together
And in the first one Persis Khambatta played Lieutenant Ilia, a bald alien officer on the Enterprise and one of my adolescent fantasies was to look down on her bald head as she went down on me and there I was.
I could feel Dakotas fingers still caressing my shaft gently and
I looked down just as my glistening wet knob reappeared accompanied by a sucking sound, she looked up and smiled lustfully before she devoured me again with her hot mouth,
I could see the bulge of my cock in her cheek as she sucked on me.
I was caressing the back of her head and was fast approaching the point of no return so I pulled out of her mouth to the sound of lip smacking and slurping.
“I think we need to redeploy this little soldier,” I said looking down at my saliva soaked cock
“Yes sir” Dakota said standing to attention and throwing an exaggerated salute.
I have to admit I was a little sad when Dakota drove away in the back of a cab.
She was being deployed to foreign soil and it was not inconceivable that I might never see her again.
Her destination though not disclosed would be fraught with dangers; she could be blown up by an IED, ambushed by insurgents or shot by one of her own allies.
All I had to worry about was Georgia catching me wetting my balls with another woman; admittedly it could get more dangerous if she knew the owner of the beaver I was attending to.
But that was not on a parallel with Dakotas prospects.
I spent the next few days writing a rather lengthy piece on the perils of soldiering, and the role of a woman in modern warfare.
The hardships and dangers any soldier faces on active service and the impact of friends and loved ones left at home to fret.
It was a modern day tale where the women are going off to war and their men keep the home fires burning.
I thought it worked on several levels and was something of a diversion for me.
Hopefully I could get it published; Gay Gordon wouldn’t be interested unless I steamed it up a bit with some sex scenes.
I wouldn’t be doing that, since I had started work on the Overend tapes I had found a new group of publishers and I was sure one of those would be interested.
On Friday I was staring through the window watching the robust Frankie bent over picking up a pile of leaves, her dungaree’s stretched tight across her well-defined buttocks.
But I was not as is the norm thinking about banging her back door in, not at that precise moment anyway.
I was about to go outside and talk to her when the phone rang.
“Oh shit,” I said reading the caller ID.
“Hi mum, its lovely to hear from you,” I said with as much sincerity as I could muster.
“Hello Simon, every time I phone you, you say that and after all these years you should be getting better at it, but you’re not are you?” she chastised “Listen I’ll get straight to the point”
She liked getting straight to the point and then generally waffled on for an eternity.
“Andrea Devereaux is back in the country, you remember Andrea?”
Andrea was an old family friend; she was actually the daughter of my mum’s best friend Karen.
“Yes of course I do” I replied
“Andrea would like to know if you could put her up for a few days while she’s in the area” Mum continued
“She asked if she could stay here?” I asked
“Well no, I offered on your behalf” she admitted
“She’s back from the missions for about a month, catching up with old friends before she returns to China”
“Of course she can stay” I said shocked
“I seem to remember you were quite taken with her when you younger” she continued
“Yes I was, but that was a long time ago” I agreed
“You will look after her wont you?” she said firmly
“She’s one of the angels”
“I will treat her like a princess” I said
“And don’t let her see any of that filth you laughably call writing” Mum commanded
“Andrea is a holy person”
“Message received and understood” I said obediently
“I will ring in the morning to say what train she will be on; can you meet her at the station?”
“Yes of course”
“Well thank you Simon” she said “I did think you might make a big fuss like the time we asked you if Molly could stay a few days”
“That was different” I said
“And look at you two now; you’re the best of friends”
“Well not so much best friends more like fuck buddies” I thought to myself and said
“Yes we are”
“I’ll call tomorrow then, bye” and she was gone
Well that was interesting, Andrea Devereaux was coming to stay.
Andrea was my first crush and she going to be staying under my roof.
She had a lot to answer for, I got my first stalker thinking about her and I had my first wet dream over Andréa, well not over her obviously, but you get the picture.
And it was Andréa who made the first contributions to my wank bank, no that doesn’t sound quite right either, well anyway,
Andrea was, is, eight years older than me and I was smitten with her, and I think her with me, but nothing happened, apart from a kiss, one single solitary kiss that blew my mind.
But Andrea shied away after that and the relationship was unresolved and whenever we were together the air was always thick with sexual tension.
But she thought it would be a sin if we did anything.
I was too young to know what her issue was with us kissing.
So I used to track her around the house like a stalker hoping to catch her bending over, maybe see a glimpse of thigh, an errant bra strap, and cleavage even.
One memorable day I caught sight of her drying herself and I was rewarded with a tantalizing view of a nipple and a momentary sight of tufty black pubes.
I almost wanked myself to death over those image burned into my adolescent brain.
I wanted her, not that I would have known what to do I still wanted her what ever that meant and I’ve always wanted her I suppose.
Well now I might get my chance.
Just then my mind came back from thoughts of curly black pubes to the present moment and I remembered that I wanted to talk to Frankie.
I rushed to the back door just in time to catch sight of her big round arse disappearing through the side gate.
“Oh shit” I exclaimed
And rushed to the front door to try and catch her before she drove off.
I opened the door just as she was getting in the truck.
“Frankie” I called “Frankie”
She saw me and got out of the van
“Frankie, I’m glad I caught you, I…?”
“No” Frankie said
“No what?” I asked puzzled
“No you can’t have a grope of my jugs I haven’t got time” she said matter of factly.
“But...”
“Or grab my arse”
“But Frankie”
“Or rummage in my pants”
“That’s not what I was going to ask” I said quite hurt
“I want you to lay a new path out in the back garden”
I said quite innocently “because I use the back way a lot”
“Yes I remember”, Frankie said
Just then Maisie appeared from Judith’s garden carrying some tools which she put in the back of the van.
“Hello Simon” she said “what are you after”
What was I after the cheeky mare.
“He wants a path laying” Frankie told her
“I knew laying would come into it somewhere” Maisie said and the pair of them laughed like drains
“What is it with you women? You’re all sex mad” I said defensively
“Talk about the pot calling the kettle black” Maisie said obviously quoting a Victorianism she’d picked up from her landlady
And they both laughed again.
When Frankie finally got control of her self she said
“I’ll pop back later and give you a quote”
Mum phoned on Saturday morning as promised but as it turned out I didn’t need to meet Andrea’s train at the station after all.
The Christian fraternity had rallied round and a rather frumpy middle-aged woman called Miranda Goodman delivered her to my door in her Morris Minor.
I invited them in and the rather frosty Ms Goodman cast an unsatisfactory eye over everything before coldly taking her leave.
I suspected there would be a distinct awkwardness between Andrea and I after all the years that had passed and the unresolved sexual tension the surrounded us, but I was pleasantly surprised.
I got the impression she was just as surprised and she seemed as relaxed I was.
She was still as pretty as I remembered, a few more lines on her face perhaps, and she wore her hair shorter, but she had lost none of her beauty or allure.
She didn’t seem as tall now but that was my memory playing tricks on me she was always 5ft 3”
I couldn’t ascertain her physical dimensions because of the loose shapeless clothes she had on, but my imagination filled in the blanks regarding, a nice arse, great legs, very decent tits and thick black curly pubes.
We spent the rest of the day talking, catching up and reminiscing.
Our paths had been very different since we last met. Hers had been one of pious devotion in the missions while mine could best be summed up as debauchery, pornography and self indulgence.
The years just seemed to have melted away.
“Its very kind of you to put me up” she said “Thank you”
“No problem” I said honestly “Are you hungry?”
“Yes I am rather” she replied
“Ok I’ll give you a quick tour, show you where everything is, and settle you in your room and while you’re freshening up I’ll cook us something” I suggested.
“That would be lovely,” Andrea said with conviction.
“Thank you again”
After I took her up I found myself behaving like my 15 year former self sneaking around trying to catch her in intimate moments and get a glimpse of forbidden flesh.
But I failed, so I went back downstairs to the kitchen.
After we’d eaten we sat and talked some more until after about an hour when she was suddenly overcome with tiredness and had excuse her self.
“I’m sorry” she said “My body clock is all over the place at the moment”
I had to admit I was quite tired myself and the only traveling I had done recently was to Kiddingstone and back, so I turned in as well.
I had to get up for a pee at about 3.00am and I was just getting back into bed when I thought I heard a noise downstairs.
I slipped on my bathrobe and cautiously crept down the stairs.
I could definitely hear someone in the kitchen, I crept to the kitchen door, which was slightly ajar, and then I breathed a sigh of relief.
It was Andrea who was making a hot drink; she was wearing blue and white-stripped pajamas several sizes too big.
The Old fashioned ones with a drawstring around the waist.
So I still couldn’t ascertain her physical dimensions because of the loose fitting PJ’s
However I was delighted to see that the fly had gaped and sprouts of black pubes were clearly visible.
Which excited me very much indeed; the problem was that once I had noticed them I couldn’t take my eyes off of them.
I knew that if I went in the kitchen I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from looking.
But I couldn’t stay in the hall and I couldn’t go back up stairs in case she saw me and I had to explain why I hadn’t wanted to go in the kitchen.
So I tried to put the image out of my head as I pushed open the door.
“Hey Andréa” I said “can’t sleep eh”
“No” she replied, “like I said my body clock is all askew”
I focused my eyes on the cupboards behind her head, and thought to myself
“I must not look, I must not look”
“I thought a hot drink might help” she continued as she checked the milk boiling on the hob.
I wanted to look so badly, and as she turned back towards me I finally gave in and stared at her gaping fly and the pubic hair escaping from it.
Almost the precise moment my eyes fixed on her pussy she looked directly at me and couldn’t help but notice me looking at her black curly pubes and she blushed a brilliant red
“Oh God” she said frantically looking around for something to cover both her embarrassment and her Minge and becoming more and more flustered every second
“I’m so sorry” I said, apologizing for embarrassing her and not being at all sorry for having looked at her errant curly tufts
“Here use this” I added as I handed her a towel
“Oh God” she said again snatching the towel from my hand and covering her snatch.
“I really am sorry” I said feebly as she bustled past me and ran out the door crying
“Oh shit” I said and sat down at the kitchen table.
It was 4.00am and I was still sitting at the kitchen table having drunk two mugs of Milo made with Andrea’s boiled milk.
And I was wide awake and cursing my behaviour.
It was going to make the atmosphere very strained for the next two days
She still couldn’t sleep either as I could clearly hear her in the shower.
I couldn’t believe what had happened, I couldn’t believe what I had done, but to cap it all I still consigned the image to my wank bank.
I was a total pig I thought to myself with my head in my hands.
Just then the kitchen door opened and as I looked up Andrea walked in still wearing the blue and white stripped pajamas.
She was biting her lip and kept looking at the floor, I smiled at her and she gave a half smile back.
And then despite everything that had already happened I had to look, it was just a quick glance at first but then my gaze lingered as to my great surprise the fly hadn’t quite closed completely and delicious sprouts of freshly showered black pubes were clearly visible through the opening and this time it was by design.
She saw me looking at her visible pubes and she knew they were visible.
Andrea blushed a vivid scarlet but made no attempt to conceal them from me as she walked towards me and instead of admonishing me she kissed me.
I couldn’t recall the number of times as a young man I had imagined that kiss as I knocked one out.
And now it had happened and it was just as sensual as I imagined it to be.
Her arms enveloped me as her embrace became more urgent as my left hand settled on her buttock and I got my first hint at the contents of her Old fashioned draw stringed pajamas when her cheek was firm to my touch.
With my left hand engaged fondling her arse there was only one place my remaining hand was going.
I pause briefly at the opening before my finger entered the gape and teased the tufts of damp pubes and though they were damp to the touch as my finger teased her curls I thought they will be much damper in a second.
As they lightly caressed her mound of Venus her kissing paused though her lips were only millimeters from mine as her hot breath fell on my cheek.
In an instant they parted her lips and slipped along her crease,
A roaring moan escaped her lips and her grip tightened around my neck,
My digits returned along her slippery crack before making another greasy descent and extracting another throaty roar from the Andrea.
And almost as an after thought she kissed my cheek.
With each subsequent journey my fingers made along her slippery slit her tone altered.
When I turned my attention to her clitoris her knees began to tremble and her lips were now by my ear so I could hear every fruity moan and murmur as I continued to frig her through the gaping crotch of her jimjams.
As my clitoral stimulation intensified her legs could no longer support her weight,
Her vice like grip around my neck was the only thing that stopped her ending in a heap on the floor.
Then I brought her to climax and she released a long low guttural growl.
I extracted my fingers from her pussy moist with her cunny juice and tugged on the draw string and her pajama bottoms fell quickly to the floor.
Now she was looking at me earnestly, biting her lip, eyes wide and eyebrows raised.
I had wanted her for 15 years and I wouldn’t have to wait much longer.
I couldn’t wait long enough to get her upstairs to have her but I didn’t want her on the kitchen floor or on the table so
I stood up and picking her up in my arms I carried her to the lounge and lay her on the sofa where several virgins had already yielded their cherries’
I looked down at her thick black triangle in stark relief against her alabaster flesh.
Andrea was still biting her lip as I undid the belt on my robe and shrugged it off my shoulders so I was completely naked and her gaze fell immediately on my swollen cock.
I knelt on the floor in front of her and with a hand on each white fleshed knee and pushed them gently apart spreading her wide open until her pink pussy opened invitingly moist amidst the black whiskers.
She drew one knee up and planted her foot against the arm of the sofa while my left hand slid down the outside of her thigh and grabbed her bum cheek I gripped my shaft with my other hand and prodded at the wetness of her with my knob.
She moaned softly, eyes shut, biting her lip
So gripping my cock I pushed my shaft between her dewy lips and I waited to feel the tell tale resistance from her hymen just before her cherry popped and she would be added to the list of the deflowered.
Andrea moaned softly as my helmet breached her hole and then again a little louder as I penetrated deeply into her, but no virginal resistance,
I had convinced myself that Andrea was pure and unsullied, I withdrew and penetrated her again and she wriggled like a fish on a river bank.
It certainly didn’t detract from my enjoyment of her as I gave her another length and she squirmed and wriggled as she received me and then she came.
I hadn’t even got warmed up yet and already she’d come and was creaming my balls.
A few more strokes and she came again, more noisily this time.
Spurred on by her audible appreciation of my efforts I fucked her harder and faster and her arse started to squeak as it rubbed on the leather couch.
As she moaned and writhed beneath me she came for the third time I was getting close to the summit myself and as I quickened my pace on her pussy her utterances were growing higher in frequency and as I reached the threshold of my own conclusion
“Oh Godddd” she screamed and with her writhing sweating body prostrate beneath me I emptied myself into her hot pulsating pussy right there on the leather couch.
Although I had waited 15 years to consummate my first crush and it was everything I could have hoped for and more, it wasn’t quite how I imagined it.
I thought she would be inexperienced, unsure and passive,
But she was none of the above, she was not the shy little angel, a timid innocent, she was a devil in disguise.
She was self-conscious, she was shy, but she didn’t lack confidence once she had determined what she wanted.
It was electrifying.
“I’ve wanted to do that for so many years” I panted as I withdrew from her and she let out a rather smug self satisfied sigh.
“Me too” she confessed
“Do you think you might sleep now?” I asked
“Mmmmm” she replied
“Ok then, do you “A” want to go up stairs and get your pajama jacket off or “B” have a mug of Milo?” I asked as I pulled her up to her feet.
“Well I really like Milo” She answered
“Get upstairs” I said and slapped her bare arse.
An Antidote To Writers Block (Part 37) Soldier Blue
When I awoke on Tuesday morning, early riser in hand, I reflected on the previous days events and determined it to be the best bonfire night I had ever had.
I didn’t even bother chastising myself for yet another notch on my totem of betrayal I just had to accept my shortcomings for the time being anyway.
Still gripping my horn I lustily anticipated revisiting Mahajak’s for some more customer servicing.
I do like the small shop ethos of being open all hours.
The good news was that Omid was still in hospital and would be for at least another week the bad news however was that Anjuli would only be visiting every other day.
I could quiet easily cope with only tasting her delights every other day
The thought of what had happened the night before and of what was to possibly still to come was not diminishing my erection so I took myself off to the shower to deal with it.
After my satisfying shower I set to work and I spent a day outlining future chapters and then spent the rest of the week on Gerald’s stories.
On the Thursday Lionel phoned me to say he had found a number of small publishers who he thought might be interested and could I send him any more finished pieces.
One of whom, he said, on hearing that the sample story was taken from a live recording by the author suggested releasing them as a recording.
I thought that might be a great idea the stories really did come alive when he told them, far more than my written format.
Having locked myself away from the sinful world for the best part of four days as I worked on the transcribed stories it was something of a relief to get out of the house and when I emerged from my home on Friday morning on a cold November morning it was in response to another phone call from Lionel Blum who had the name of an audio expert, or “whiz kid” as Lionel called him, who he had engaged to clean up the Overend recordings.
I liked the idea of a much wider section of people having the opportunity to bask in the illuminating light that shone from Gerald as he spoke.
But I was uneasy about handing over the tapes to a complete stranger, whiz kid or not.
In the end I reached a compromise with Lionel who suggested releasing into the “whiz kids” possession a small selection of tapes and after reviewing their quality a decision would be made how to proceed further.
Some of the recordings were just of Gerald speaking into a microphone and they were the most complete in terms of content, but the other ones where he recorded secretly as he told the tales to an enraptured audience.
So I selected ten recordings, five with an audience and 5 without on a variety of different media and slipped them into my inside coat pocket and away I went.
I called in at Mahajak’s on the way to the station and flirted with the two women as usual.
“How’s Omid?” I asked Shula
“He’s doing well” She replied Aunt Anjuli is going to see him tonight, aren’t you aunty”
Anjuli nodded and smiled in response
I gave Shula a wink and she smiled at me.
“Give him my best wishes,” I said to Aunt Anjuli
“I will, I will” she replied happily
“And while you give him my best wishes I will be giving his wife something else” I thought to myself
Once I had disembarked in Kiddingstone I took the first cab on
The rank and we quickly headed towards the address supplied.
When we pulled up outside the Sound Bite Studio’s I was in truth not impressed.
The premises were drab and dingy and quite frankly uninspiring.
My first instinct was to get the cab to return me to the station but Lionel had said he was an expert so I decided I would at least meet the “whiz kid”.
I paid the cab driver and walked towards the unimpressive front entrance.
Failing to locate a doorknob, I placed my hand on the push plate and put my weight behind it but the door didn’t open to my touch.
I looked to the left and saw an intercom so I pushed the buzzer.
Then the speaker crackled and a tinny voice said
“Yes?”
“Simon Fisher to see Marcus Crossfield” I shouted at the wall
“Come up” the voice said and the lock, buzzed
I repeated my previous action with the door and this time it yielded.
On entering the dimly lit lobby my first thought was that at least it was in keeping with the façade.
I trudged up the stairs wishing I’d stayed at home but when I pushed open the door at the top of the staircase I couldn’t believe my eyes.
Everything was shinny chrome and bright lights and there was hi-tech equipment everywhere, it was such a stark contrast to the outside.
“Can I help?” a voice said in a manner that conveyed anything but the desire to help.
Also I couldn’t help smiling as I thought I had done the speaker quality a disservice as the girl actually had a tinny voice.
She was a small girl in her mid twenties, Gloria, according to the name on her coffee mug, and she was about 4ft 10” quite slim but with the most enormous tits, rather too big for my taste, they were almost in the realm of comedy breasts, totally out of proportion to her tiny frame.
They were displayed in a very low cut black top and looked like two bald men sharing a coat.
Her face was not an attractive one but I suppose when you have tits like that, most men wouldn’t even notice her face.
“Yes” I said, “I’m here to see Marcus Crossfield”
“Name?” she barked
“Simon Fisher” I replied rather sharply as I’d already told her all of this over the intercom.
“Wait here” she ordered and walked away
I assumed that the boss employed her because of the size of her nork's and not for her expertise or personality.
A few moments later she returned
“This way” Gloria called and led me to my appointment, I have to say that her arse end was much more pleasing to my eye than her frontage.
When we reached Marcus Crossfield’s office she stepped to one side and grunted
“In there”
I stepped through the open door and was greeted by a middle-aged man dressed like a used car salesman, some whiz kid, I thought.
“Simon” he said standing up and proffering his hand.
I took his hand
“Marcus” I said shaking his hand, he certainly shook hands like a salesman.
“Please call me Marc,” he said pointing, “Take a seat”
I sat and thought Lionel had clearly been given some bad information about Mr. Crossfield and I thought there was little chance I would remain there for long.
“I must apologize for Gloria, she’s a lousy receptionist but did you get an eyeful of those magnificent jugs?” he said almost drooling
I wasn’t in the mood for male bonding so I pressed on him the reason for our meeting.
“Lionel Blum tells me you come highly recommended”
“Well not me” he interrupted “it’s my company but Tilly is the genius”
He stood up and walked around the desk
“I’ll introduce you” he said and led me along a corridor and into an office/studio, which had computers and mixing desks and every gadget imaginable, clearly Tilly was the whiz kid.
And sitting at a console was a young woman wearing headphones.
“Tilly?” Marcus shouted.
And she looked up, smiled and took off her headphones
Tilly was a tall girl, stick thin, with no visible bust line at all, clearly behind Gloria in that particular queue, She had no hips and from behind she looked like a boy.
I ascertained she was probably mid to late twenties; she had a pretty face, even prettier when she smiled which she did as she approached.
“Tilly this is Simon Fisher” he said to her and then addressing me “and this is Tilly Bushe”
We shook hands and Marcus excused himself leaving me with skinny Minnie.
I was still a little uneasy about handing over the tapes, as the company hadn’t so far lived up to my expectations.
But Tilly explained what some of the equipment did and the process she would follow.
“The recordings will be quite safe” she assured me “the very first step is a high definition copy, to protect the integrity of the media”
“Ok” I said and handed over the tapes.
“Is that all of them?” she queried, “I understood there were a lot more”
“There are” I replied “but…”
“But you don’t trust me” Tilly concluded
“I don’t know you” I said “or what you are capable of”
“You will” she responded, “I promise”
“It’s just that these recordings were entrusted to me by Gerald Overend’s widow”
“I promise,” she repeated
So I took her at her word and left the recordings with her but she promised to have something for me soon.
But before I left she asked one last question
“I need a working title for the recordings”
I had given it some thought on my way over, I had already settled on “Tales From The Club House” for the written work.
And I remembered Gerald telling me one time that in his youth he was a big prog rock fan, King Crimson, Gentle Giant, Jethro Tull, Yes, that kind of stuff and I wasn’t a hundred percent sure if it was a song title or a lyric but I chose something that seemed appropriate.
“Raconteur Troubadour” I told Tilly then she took me to lunch and
Elaborated to me the methods she would employ and I think she was flirting with me.
Anyway we had a nice lunch and we had covered all the technical stuff so over coffee it was time to change the tone.
“So what is Tilly short for?” I asked expecting her to say Mathilda
“It’s not short for anything” she said, “It’s a family name”
“So what’s your actual name then?” I pressed
“Oh God” she winced “do I have to say?”
“Is it so terrible?” I asked
“Yes it really is” she buried her face in her hands
“Then yes you definitely have to say,” I told her
“Ophelia” Tilly said
I thought about it for a moment and then the penny dropped and I burst out laughing
“Ophelia Bushe?” I asked still laughing
“Stop it, it’s not funny,” she said laughing herself
“Oh it really is” I responded.
Well it was a bright sunny morning outside St Lucy’s church where the villagers were thronging around the war memorial as the Remembrance Day parade, Representatives of all the service, a proud bunch of Old soldiers, all arms of the scouting fraternity, local dignitaries et al came to a halt.
It was nice to see the Vicar had returned, looking a little pale and drawn, but nonetheless back in harness.
“A family crisis” was the reason, circulating the village, for her absence the week before.
I felt there was more to it than that but it was good to see her back.
It was a good service and then the village duly paid its tribute to the fallen in the time-honoured fashion.
I always felt a little humbled afterwards honouring those men and women who made the ultimate sacrifice, and if they had known the outcome their actions would not have differed.
I often wondered if the modern generation would be so resolute faced with the same challenges, I thought it doubtful.
Anyway I preferred to spend the rest of the day alone with my thought and so declined the invitation for lunch at the pub and headed home.
I walked along the quiet path that separated the houses from the golf course and was rather enjoying the peace and solitude.
When I was felled and left lying prostrate on the ground and then I felt a great weight on my chest
“Oh God” I thought, “I’m having a heart attach”
I closed my eyes and dark thoughts filled my mind and I wondered if I would be reduced to passive sex for the rest of my life, however short that life might be.
“Simon Fisher” a quiet voice spoke to me and I thought God is calling me to him, my time is over.
I can’t say I wasn’t a little disappointed, and not just about being taken at 29, I was expecting a great booming voice, a more commanding voice, not a soft female voice with an American accent.
And then I was appalled to think that God was an American, they get bloody everywhere, and a woman.
“Come on you wuss” the voice, said not very Godly and the weight lifted from my chest and I began to rise.
“Are you ok?” the voice asked, “Did I hurt you?”
I opened my eyes expecting to be at the gates of heaven but I was on the same path where I fell.
Being addressed by a soldier
“Are you ok?” the soldier asked
“Yes” I said a little puzzled
Then the soldier removed her hat
“Dakota”? I said with surprise
“Yep” she replied
“You didn’t say you were in the army” I was still surprised
“You didn’t ask” she replied
“No I didn’t,” I acknowledged
“That’s why I’m staying with Uncle Will” She explained “I’m on extended leave before we deploy”
“Where to?” I asked
“I can’t say” Dakota Replied. “Anyway, are you ok?”
“Yes” I said dusting my self-down
“You went down like a girl,” she said laughing hysterically
“On a Sunday in Bushy Down we don’t expect to be attacked in the woods by a ninja “
She was still laughing when she said
“Are we going back to yours then”?
“I do like a bird in uniform” I thought as we were walking back to the house.
Now I don’t know if it’s just a man thing or not, I don’t think it is.
I mean I’ve heard women go on about fireman a lot and they generally have a wistful look in their eye when doing so.
But what I do know is that it can’t just be me I mean uniforms are just phwoar.
Dakota was still ribbing me about how easy I went to ground as we walked down the lawn to the back door.
Dakota Browning’s uniform was well, as uniforms go I’ve seen sexier, it wasn’t the tailored skirt and tunic, brass buttons and polished belt, peaked cap, seamed stockings and khaki knickers kind of uniform.
It was yomping boots, combat trousers and battle dress jacket, although I was still hoping for khaki knickers.
But a uniform is a uniform and she was completely hairless remember.
I opened the door and let Dakota inside she bent down and began unlacing her boots.
I went in the hall and hung up my coat and slipped my shoes off and when I went back in the kitchen Dakota was stood on the back door mat wearing a Khaki vest, boxer shorts and her dog tags.
“That will do for me,” I thought, as I looked her over
“I don’t have long” she said “I have to report back to barracks on Tuesday”
Then she walked towards me and we kissed.
“We’d better not waste any more time then” I suggested and we kissed some more.
He body was solid, firm and muscular, and I’m sure she could have carried me off to bed if she wanted to.
“Where do want me sir?” she asked and threw a salute
“I think I want you upstairs soldier” I replied “on the double”
And she turned on her heels and ran upstairs I ran after her discarding clothes as I went.
When I entered the bedroom I was wearing one sock and my pants.
Dakota was stood facing me and pulled the vest off over her head and smiled as her breasts rearranged themselves before my eyes.
“Uncle Will told me that you have a reputation,” she said as I removed my errant sock “apparently everyone says that you’re a dog”
“People are prone to exaggerate,” I said as I dropped my pants
“Oh I do hope not” she responded looking at my erection
My pants were around my ankles and I lifted one foot out of the leg and kicked them at her face she threw out a hand to catch them and in that split second of distraction I crossed the room and manhandled her onto the bed.
“That’s dirty fighting” she yelped as I got her on her back and pinned her there
“Well GI Jane what are you going to do now?” I asked holding her immobilized on the bed
“I’m going to let you fuck me,” she said and I kissed her and her tongue was in my mouth in an instant.
Darting in and out as my hand released its grip on her wrist and instead grasped one of her firm breasts.
Her arms were around me now, her hands caressing my torso as I played with her nipple.
I stopped kissing her and she licked her lips and I began kissing my way down her skin from her neck to her pink proud nipple.
I licked her areola before taking the teat between my lips and sucking on it noisily.
Dakota wriggled beneath me and murmured contentedly as I suckled and her chest was rising and falling as her heart pounded in my ear.
With a slurp I released her swollen misshapen nipple and my lips began there journey south, kissing along the rim of her rib cage and down across her belly, a flick of my tongue in her belly button
And she squirmed.
I was knelt on the floor between her legs looking up at her, head turned to one side, mouth open, eyes closed, her tongue constantly licking her lips in anticipation.
I reached up my hands to her belly and slipping my fingers between the waistband of her shorts and her quivering flesh I tugged them gently over her hips and off her firm round buttocks and slowly down her thighs towards her knees and then they slipped easily passed her ankles.
And there she was naked and hairless before me, if she was at all self-conscious she didn’t show it.
She just squirmed a little and continued licking her lips.
And I was about to do the same.
I pushed her knees slightly apart and lean forward and starting where I had left off I kissed my way down from her navel to her silky smooth hairless mound.
She spread her thigh invitingly and there was her perfect soft naked pussy, the most aesthetically pleasing pussy I had ever seen
No razor burn, no stubble, no pimples, just a silky smooth mound and soft unblemished lips and as my lips moved to touch hers I thought the skin was the softest my lips had ever touched.
Then I open her with my tongue and she moaned in a hot velvety purr, a sound repeated often as I worked on her with my tongue until her back arched, her fanny farted and the velvet purr became a gravelly growl.
Dakota sat up and lifting my head from her juicy lips she kissed me and her spare hand began tugging on my cock.
As she kissed me I pushed her thighs wide open and let her guide my purple head between her moist lips.
As soon as I could feel her syrupy juice around my head I thrust my pelvis forward and I was in.
She stopped kissing me and let out the dirtiest whorish moan I’d ever heard, I hoped it wouldn’t be the last.
Dakota wrapped her arms around my neck, her face was pressed against mine and I could feel every moan that came from her as well as hearing it, it was incredibly sensual, dirty and pure at the same moment.
Her thighs squeezed my hips in response to every thrust.
But the soldier was tiring and she released her grip around my neck and fell backward onto the bed, her thighs still gripped on and now her legs wrapped around my arse.
Dakotas head was rolling back and forth and she was moaning almost continually, her hands had grasped handfuls of duvet as she writhed and wriggled.
And I was so close, I slid my hands along her soft skin and cupped her full round breasts as I rushed headlong to the point of ecstasy, and then with one final nerve tingling thrust, Dakota roared as I jerked, spasm’d and spaffed.
“Woof” I barked to the hairless panting creature beneath me and Dakota laughed between the panting and her pussy jiggled my cock, which made me laugh.
In the after glow on that November afternoon we cuddled under the duvet very snug and smug.
“Can I stay tonight”? She asked
“Of course hon” I replied and kissed her bald head
“Good” she said and we fell asleep but awoke two hours later refreshed and horny.
I didn’t even bother chastising myself for yet another notch on my totem of betrayal I just had to accept my shortcomings for the time being anyway.
Still gripping my horn I lustily anticipated revisiting Mahajak’s for some more customer servicing.
I do like the small shop ethos of being open all hours.
The good news was that Omid was still in hospital and would be for at least another week the bad news however was that Anjuli would only be visiting every other day.
I could quiet easily cope with only tasting her delights every other day
The thought of what had happened the night before and of what was to possibly still to come was not diminishing my erection so I took myself off to the shower to deal with it.
After my satisfying shower I set to work and I spent a day outlining future chapters and then spent the rest of the week on Gerald’s stories.
On the Thursday Lionel phoned me to say he had found a number of small publishers who he thought might be interested and could I send him any more finished pieces.
One of whom, he said, on hearing that the sample story was taken from a live recording by the author suggested releasing them as a recording.
I thought that might be a great idea the stories really did come alive when he told them, far more than my written format.
Having locked myself away from the sinful world for the best part of four days as I worked on the transcribed stories it was something of a relief to get out of the house and when I emerged from my home on Friday morning on a cold November morning it was in response to another phone call from Lionel Blum who had the name of an audio expert, or “whiz kid” as Lionel called him, who he had engaged to clean up the Overend recordings.
I liked the idea of a much wider section of people having the opportunity to bask in the illuminating light that shone from Gerald as he spoke.
But I was uneasy about handing over the tapes to a complete stranger, whiz kid or not.
In the end I reached a compromise with Lionel who suggested releasing into the “whiz kids” possession a small selection of tapes and after reviewing their quality a decision would be made how to proceed further.
Some of the recordings were just of Gerald speaking into a microphone and they were the most complete in terms of content, but the other ones where he recorded secretly as he told the tales to an enraptured audience.
So I selected ten recordings, five with an audience and 5 without on a variety of different media and slipped them into my inside coat pocket and away I went.
I called in at Mahajak’s on the way to the station and flirted with the two women as usual.
“How’s Omid?” I asked Shula
“He’s doing well” She replied Aunt Anjuli is going to see him tonight, aren’t you aunty”
Anjuli nodded and smiled in response
I gave Shula a wink and she smiled at me.
“Give him my best wishes,” I said to Aunt Anjuli
“I will, I will” she replied happily
“And while you give him my best wishes I will be giving his wife something else” I thought to myself
Once I had disembarked in Kiddingstone I took the first cab on
The rank and we quickly headed towards the address supplied.
When we pulled up outside the Sound Bite Studio’s I was in truth not impressed.
The premises were drab and dingy and quite frankly uninspiring.
My first instinct was to get the cab to return me to the station but Lionel had said he was an expert so I decided I would at least meet the “whiz kid”.
I paid the cab driver and walked towards the unimpressive front entrance.
Failing to locate a doorknob, I placed my hand on the push plate and put my weight behind it but the door didn’t open to my touch.
I looked to the left and saw an intercom so I pushed the buzzer.
Then the speaker crackled and a tinny voice said
“Yes?”
“Simon Fisher to see Marcus Crossfield” I shouted at the wall
“Come up” the voice said and the lock, buzzed
I repeated my previous action with the door and this time it yielded.
On entering the dimly lit lobby my first thought was that at least it was in keeping with the façade.
I trudged up the stairs wishing I’d stayed at home but when I pushed open the door at the top of the staircase I couldn’t believe my eyes.
Everything was shinny chrome and bright lights and there was hi-tech equipment everywhere, it was such a stark contrast to the outside.
“Can I help?” a voice said in a manner that conveyed anything but the desire to help.
Also I couldn’t help smiling as I thought I had done the speaker quality a disservice as the girl actually had a tinny voice.
She was a small girl in her mid twenties, Gloria, according to the name on her coffee mug, and she was about 4ft 10” quite slim but with the most enormous tits, rather too big for my taste, they were almost in the realm of comedy breasts, totally out of proportion to her tiny frame.
They were displayed in a very low cut black top and looked like two bald men sharing a coat.
Her face was not an attractive one but I suppose when you have tits like that, most men wouldn’t even notice her face.
“Yes” I said, “I’m here to see Marcus Crossfield”
“Name?” she barked
“Simon Fisher” I replied rather sharply as I’d already told her all of this over the intercom.
“Wait here” she ordered and walked away
I assumed that the boss employed her because of the size of her nork's and not for her expertise or personality.
A few moments later she returned
“This way” Gloria called and led me to my appointment, I have to say that her arse end was much more pleasing to my eye than her frontage.
When we reached Marcus Crossfield’s office she stepped to one side and grunted
“In there”
I stepped through the open door and was greeted by a middle-aged man dressed like a used car salesman, some whiz kid, I thought.
“Simon” he said standing up and proffering his hand.
I took his hand
“Marcus” I said shaking his hand, he certainly shook hands like a salesman.
“Please call me Marc,” he said pointing, “Take a seat”
I sat and thought Lionel had clearly been given some bad information about Mr. Crossfield and I thought there was little chance I would remain there for long.
“I must apologize for Gloria, she’s a lousy receptionist but did you get an eyeful of those magnificent jugs?” he said almost drooling
I wasn’t in the mood for male bonding so I pressed on him the reason for our meeting.
“Lionel Blum tells me you come highly recommended”
“Well not me” he interrupted “it’s my company but Tilly is the genius”
He stood up and walked around the desk
“I’ll introduce you” he said and led me along a corridor and into an office/studio, which had computers and mixing desks and every gadget imaginable, clearly Tilly was the whiz kid.
And sitting at a console was a young woman wearing headphones.
“Tilly?” Marcus shouted.
And she looked up, smiled and took off her headphones
Tilly was a tall girl, stick thin, with no visible bust line at all, clearly behind Gloria in that particular queue, She had no hips and from behind she looked like a boy.
I ascertained she was probably mid to late twenties; she had a pretty face, even prettier when she smiled which she did as she approached.
“Tilly this is Simon Fisher” he said to her and then addressing me “and this is Tilly Bushe”
We shook hands and Marcus excused himself leaving me with skinny Minnie.
I was still a little uneasy about handing over the tapes, as the company hadn’t so far lived up to my expectations.
But Tilly explained what some of the equipment did and the process she would follow.
“The recordings will be quite safe” she assured me “the very first step is a high definition copy, to protect the integrity of the media”
“Ok” I said and handed over the tapes.
“Is that all of them?” she queried, “I understood there were a lot more”
“There are” I replied “but…”
“But you don’t trust me” Tilly concluded
“I don’t know you” I said “or what you are capable of”
“You will” she responded, “I promise”
“It’s just that these recordings were entrusted to me by Gerald Overend’s widow”
“I promise,” she repeated
So I took her at her word and left the recordings with her but she promised to have something for me soon.
But before I left she asked one last question
“I need a working title for the recordings”
I had given it some thought on my way over, I had already settled on “Tales From The Club House” for the written work.
And I remembered Gerald telling me one time that in his youth he was a big prog rock fan, King Crimson, Gentle Giant, Jethro Tull, Yes, that kind of stuff and I wasn’t a hundred percent sure if it was a song title or a lyric but I chose something that seemed appropriate.
“Raconteur Troubadour” I told Tilly then she took me to lunch and
Elaborated to me the methods she would employ and I think she was flirting with me.
Anyway we had a nice lunch and we had covered all the technical stuff so over coffee it was time to change the tone.
“So what is Tilly short for?” I asked expecting her to say Mathilda
“It’s not short for anything” she said, “It’s a family name”
“So what’s your actual name then?” I pressed
“Oh God” she winced “do I have to say?”
“Is it so terrible?” I asked
“Yes it really is” she buried her face in her hands
“Then yes you definitely have to say,” I told her
“Ophelia” Tilly said
I thought about it for a moment and then the penny dropped and I burst out laughing
“Ophelia Bushe?” I asked still laughing
“Stop it, it’s not funny,” she said laughing herself
“Oh it really is” I responded.
Well it was a bright sunny morning outside St Lucy’s church where the villagers were thronging around the war memorial as the Remembrance Day parade, Representatives of all the service, a proud bunch of Old soldiers, all arms of the scouting fraternity, local dignitaries et al came to a halt.
It was nice to see the Vicar had returned, looking a little pale and drawn, but nonetheless back in harness.
“A family crisis” was the reason, circulating the village, for her absence the week before.
I felt there was more to it than that but it was good to see her back.
It was a good service and then the village duly paid its tribute to the fallen in the time-honoured fashion.
I always felt a little humbled afterwards honouring those men and women who made the ultimate sacrifice, and if they had known the outcome their actions would not have differed.
I often wondered if the modern generation would be so resolute faced with the same challenges, I thought it doubtful.
Anyway I preferred to spend the rest of the day alone with my thought and so declined the invitation for lunch at the pub and headed home.
I walked along the quiet path that separated the houses from the golf course and was rather enjoying the peace and solitude.
When I was felled and left lying prostrate on the ground and then I felt a great weight on my chest
“Oh God” I thought, “I’m having a heart attach”
I closed my eyes and dark thoughts filled my mind and I wondered if I would be reduced to passive sex for the rest of my life, however short that life might be.
“Simon Fisher” a quiet voice spoke to me and I thought God is calling me to him, my time is over.
I can’t say I wasn’t a little disappointed, and not just about being taken at 29, I was expecting a great booming voice, a more commanding voice, not a soft female voice with an American accent.
And then I was appalled to think that God was an American, they get bloody everywhere, and a woman.
“Come on you wuss” the voice, said not very Godly and the weight lifted from my chest and I began to rise.
“Are you ok?” the voice asked, “Did I hurt you?”
I opened my eyes expecting to be at the gates of heaven but I was on the same path where I fell.
Being addressed by a soldier
“Are you ok?” the soldier asked
“Yes” I said a little puzzled
Then the soldier removed her hat
“Dakota”? I said with surprise
“Yep” she replied
“You didn’t say you were in the army” I was still surprised
“You didn’t ask” she replied
“No I didn’t,” I acknowledged
“That’s why I’m staying with Uncle Will” She explained “I’m on extended leave before we deploy”
“Where to?” I asked
“I can’t say” Dakota Replied. “Anyway, are you ok?”
“Yes” I said dusting my self-down
“You went down like a girl,” she said laughing hysterically
“On a Sunday in Bushy Down we don’t expect to be attacked in the woods by a ninja “
She was still laughing when she said
“Are we going back to yours then”?
“I do like a bird in uniform” I thought as we were walking back to the house.
Now I don’t know if it’s just a man thing or not, I don’t think it is.
I mean I’ve heard women go on about fireman a lot and they generally have a wistful look in their eye when doing so.
But what I do know is that it can’t just be me I mean uniforms are just phwoar.
Dakota was still ribbing me about how easy I went to ground as we walked down the lawn to the back door.
Dakota Browning’s uniform was well, as uniforms go I’ve seen sexier, it wasn’t the tailored skirt and tunic, brass buttons and polished belt, peaked cap, seamed stockings and khaki knickers kind of uniform.
It was yomping boots, combat trousers and battle dress jacket, although I was still hoping for khaki knickers.
But a uniform is a uniform and she was completely hairless remember.
I opened the door and let Dakota inside she bent down and began unlacing her boots.
I went in the hall and hung up my coat and slipped my shoes off and when I went back in the kitchen Dakota was stood on the back door mat wearing a Khaki vest, boxer shorts and her dog tags.
“That will do for me,” I thought, as I looked her over
“I don’t have long” she said “I have to report back to barracks on Tuesday”
Then she walked towards me and we kissed.
“We’d better not waste any more time then” I suggested and we kissed some more.
He body was solid, firm and muscular, and I’m sure she could have carried me off to bed if she wanted to.
“Where do want me sir?” she asked and threw a salute
“I think I want you upstairs soldier” I replied “on the double”
And she turned on her heels and ran upstairs I ran after her discarding clothes as I went.
When I entered the bedroom I was wearing one sock and my pants.
Dakota was stood facing me and pulled the vest off over her head and smiled as her breasts rearranged themselves before my eyes.
“Uncle Will told me that you have a reputation,” she said as I removed my errant sock “apparently everyone says that you’re a dog”
“People are prone to exaggerate,” I said as I dropped my pants
“Oh I do hope not” she responded looking at my erection
My pants were around my ankles and I lifted one foot out of the leg and kicked them at her face she threw out a hand to catch them and in that split second of distraction I crossed the room and manhandled her onto the bed.
“That’s dirty fighting” she yelped as I got her on her back and pinned her there
“Well GI Jane what are you going to do now?” I asked holding her immobilized on the bed
“I’m going to let you fuck me,” she said and I kissed her and her tongue was in my mouth in an instant.
Darting in and out as my hand released its grip on her wrist and instead grasped one of her firm breasts.
Her arms were around me now, her hands caressing my torso as I played with her nipple.
I stopped kissing her and she licked her lips and I began kissing my way down her skin from her neck to her pink proud nipple.
I licked her areola before taking the teat between my lips and sucking on it noisily.
Dakota wriggled beneath me and murmured contentedly as I suckled and her chest was rising and falling as her heart pounded in my ear.
With a slurp I released her swollen misshapen nipple and my lips began there journey south, kissing along the rim of her rib cage and down across her belly, a flick of my tongue in her belly button
And she squirmed.
I was knelt on the floor between her legs looking up at her, head turned to one side, mouth open, eyes closed, her tongue constantly licking her lips in anticipation.
I reached up my hands to her belly and slipping my fingers between the waistband of her shorts and her quivering flesh I tugged them gently over her hips and off her firm round buttocks and slowly down her thighs towards her knees and then they slipped easily passed her ankles.
And there she was naked and hairless before me, if she was at all self-conscious she didn’t show it.
She just squirmed a little and continued licking her lips.
And I was about to do the same.
I pushed her knees slightly apart and lean forward and starting where I had left off I kissed my way down from her navel to her silky smooth hairless mound.
She spread her thigh invitingly and there was her perfect soft naked pussy, the most aesthetically pleasing pussy I had ever seen
No razor burn, no stubble, no pimples, just a silky smooth mound and soft unblemished lips and as my lips moved to touch hers I thought the skin was the softest my lips had ever touched.
Then I open her with my tongue and she moaned in a hot velvety purr, a sound repeated often as I worked on her with my tongue until her back arched, her fanny farted and the velvet purr became a gravelly growl.
Dakota sat up and lifting my head from her juicy lips she kissed me and her spare hand began tugging on my cock.
As she kissed me I pushed her thighs wide open and let her guide my purple head between her moist lips.
As soon as I could feel her syrupy juice around my head I thrust my pelvis forward and I was in.
She stopped kissing me and let out the dirtiest whorish moan I’d ever heard, I hoped it wouldn’t be the last.
Dakota wrapped her arms around my neck, her face was pressed against mine and I could feel every moan that came from her as well as hearing it, it was incredibly sensual, dirty and pure at the same moment.
Her thighs squeezed my hips in response to every thrust.
But the soldier was tiring and she released her grip around my neck and fell backward onto the bed, her thighs still gripped on and now her legs wrapped around my arse.
Dakotas head was rolling back and forth and she was moaning almost continually, her hands had grasped handfuls of duvet as she writhed and wriggled.
And I was so close, I slid my hands along her soft skin and cupped her full round breasts as I rushed headlong to the point of ecstasy, and then with one final nerve tingling thrust, Dakota roared as I jerked, spasm’d and spaffed.
“Woof” I barked to the hairless panting creature beneath me and Dakota laughed between the panting and her pussy jiggled my cock, which made me laugh.
In the after glow on that November afternoon we cuddled under the duvet very snug and smug.
“Can I stay tonight”? She asked
“Of course hon” I replied and kissed her bald head
“Good” she said and we fell asleep but awoke two hours later refreshed and horny.
An Antidote To Writers Block (Part 36) Remember, Remember
Since taking Georgia back to Roehampton I had had plenty of time to think about the time we spent together and more importantly the implications of our conversations.
The fact that Georgia wouldn’t be home until Christmas and we had agreed to keep contact to a minimum meant no lies and no broken promises.
All the time Georgia and I had been together, in fact ever since she set her cap at me back in May she had me heart and soul exclusively but not so my body.
But since she delivered her ultimatum, the threat of losing her love had been hanging over my head like the sword of Damocles.
Now I couldn’t believe it, I was off the hook; I no longer had to curb my appetites, as there was no apparent consequence to my actions.
So could I relax? Did I have to change? And if I didn’t have to change, could I change.
Well the lack of apparent consequences resulted in my treating myself to some Halloween over indulgence.
Following on from my Halloween hat trick with Jen on Saturday night I got to have her best friend Ellie on Halloween itself.
Traditionally it has never been my favourite holiday, as the Americans would say, however, never before have I been able to enjoy two such choice candies as Jenny and Emily, who certainly both did the trick and were a real treat.
I didn’t know it at the time but that Halloween was the last time I would get to enjoy the pleasures of Jenny Smithson though the little witch Emily Gomez would remain a frequent flyer.
But after having Emily I’m not sure I didn’t feel guiltier with the ultimatum suspended and not being under scrutiny, than I did when I was under threat.
Of course I always felt guilty after such lustful interactions, and this occasion was no different, and I always swore to myself not to do it again, again this time was no different.
But at the time, I perform my philandering betrayals without a second thought for the woman I love, and love her I most certainly do.
But with every pleasure there is a pain I just haven’t felt it yet.
So after mulling over everything for the umpteenth time I had decided that I would treat the temporary separation as an amnesty.
I could spend the next two months shagging everything with a pulse and I wouldn’t have to worry.
I wouldn’t be seeing Georgia so I wouldn’t have to lie to her so
I could do what I wanted or who I wanted between Halloween and Christmas
But I decided that I would not go looking for crumpet, I would not frequent pick up places, I would not hunt for wenches, but if some suitable choice titbits fell across my path who were in playful mood they would be considered fare game and sin free.
I made this decision knowing full well that the chance of me getting to Christmas with my balls dry was remote at best.
There were always opportunities of available skirt come December or put another way there were always plenty of chances to come in December with the available skirt.
Then in January it would be a case of New Year new me.
So with my old chap still tingling at the thought of my Halloween recollections I thought to myself.
“I hope Guy Fawkes Night goes with as big a bang as Halloween”
Since I first transcribed Gerald Overend’s tapes I had rather let things slip it was now the first day of November and a month had elapsed since the grieving widow entrusted the tapes to me.
So I determined my task for November was to begin in earnest my efforts to fulfil my promise to Eleanor.
I had already roughly transcribed the tapes a month earlier and now decided to choose one story and hone it into a something that was as credible and colourful as Gerald’s spoken words, and yet suitable for publication.
It was the first piece I had written for some considerable time that was not tantamount to pornography.
I spent considerably more time on this one story that I ever did on my own creations and when it was edited and polished I emailed it to my publisher Gordon Bramstock.
Gay Gordon replied later that day to say he enjoyed the story very much but it wasn’t something he was interested in, he preferred more salacious material, however he did give me the names of three publishers who might be interested.
So I called my agent Lionel Blum intending to put him to work, but he was meeting another client in Godalming so I left him a voice mail.
When he returned my call we arranged to meet for a drink in Guildford the next day.
As I walked towards the station, I checked my watch and found I had plenty of time to call in to Mahajak’s, the village shop and see the lovely Shulah.
The shop was owned and run by Omid although it was his young wife Shulah and her Aunt Anjuli who did all the work.
He was a surly old goat and old enough to be her father in fact he was old enough to be my father.
Shulah and her Aunt though were both lovely, Shushu was a few years younger than me, tall and slim but her thick back-combed hair made her look even taller.
She was a Skinny girl but not in a boney way she just had a skinny frame I was sure she would be extremely flexible in the clinches.
Her eyes were big and almost black and she had a huge toothy smile, which lit up the whole shop if not the village.
The rest of her figure was concealed beneath a loose fitting robe affair, but I knew what pert little breasts she had hidden under there after a close encounter in the unisex changing room at the swimming pool, where I had a delightful taster of what might be, when my hands explored inside her costume.
I had hopes that I might become better acquainted with her treasures.
I have always flirted dreadfully with her and her aunt and they always flirted back.
That day was no exception Shula was in the shop I brushed passed her very closely.
“Morning Shula” I said and she instantly got very flustered
“Oh, oh, good morning Simon” she said and moved awkwardly to the counter
“Hello Anjuli” I said to her aunt who blushed and giggled
As usual when it came time to pay, on this occasion for a newspaper, there was a lingering exchange where our hands almost touched but didn’t quite but then I caressed her hand with my thumb and brushed my fingertips against hers and she smiled a broad toothy smile and blushed.
“Bye Shushu” I said and winked at her and turned and walked away to catch my train.
When I was on the train Lionel rang me and said he would pick me up at the station.
We found a nice pub in Godalming and over a drink I explained what I wanted to do, but I made it perfectly clear that he would only get half his normal commission, as the proceeds would be going to charity.
Despite his having to take a cut in commission he cheerfully agreed.
I got home mid afternoon and had just sat down with a drink when the phone rang.
I was a little fed up, it was like they knew, as if there was a sensor in the chair and as soon as my arse hit the cushion the phone would ring or the doorbell would sound, it was a conspiracy.
“Hello” I said abruptly
“Hello Simon” said a hoarse voice “its Laura”
It’s just as well she clarified because I would never have recognised her voice.
My initial anger at being disturbed melted away when I realised Laura had the flu.
“Hello Laura” I said, “you don’t sound too good”
“It’s the flu I’m afraid” Laura said, “Could I ask a favour”?
“Of course” I replied
“Geoff has to work late and the twins are desperate to see the firework display tonight”
“And you would like me to take them”? I interrupted
“Would you?” she said
“What time would you like me?”
I picked the girls up at six and Laura couldn’t thank me enough for stepping in.
Lisa and Julie were incredibly excited in that way that only eight-year-old girls can be.
The firework display was to take place in long field, which ran between the railway line and the main road on the other side of the tracks from the village proper.
Apart from the fireworks and the obligatory bonfire, there were also the usual assortments of amusements, darts, shooting galleries, bingo that kind of thing. And I think the girls where looking forward to them as much as fireworks themselves.
By the time we had to take up position for the display they had both won something on their own and I had won them both a cuddly toy on the shooting gallery when we decided there was just time for one more hotdog before the fireworks.
By the time it was all over, between the games and the food I was pretty much cleaned out.
But I hadn’t had that much fun with my clothes on for a good long while so it was worth every penny.
I had taken some good shots of the pair of them on my phone playing various amusements and they took some of me and I got them to send them to Georgia.
With the smoke from the display still thick in the air I walked the twins to their house and as we were approaching, the front door opened and Geoff was standing there waiting.
“Dad, Dad” they cried running up the drive “look what we’ve got”
I didn’t know where they got the energy from but I was knackered but eventually the excited twins went inside
“Don’t wake mum” Geoffrey called to them before turning to me and shaking my hand
“Thank you so much Simon, Laura really isn’t well”
“It was a pleasure” I said “I’ve really enjoyed myself, and I’m not just saying that”
“Will you come in for nip?” he asked
“I won’t if you don’t mind, I’m shattered” I replied
“Another time then” Geoff said
I wondered on my way home if I should have gone in for that drink, when I thought about it I was left with the impression he may have wanted to talk about something.
Just as I was walking past the station and I had resolved to pop round for a chat with him over the next few days I noticed the lights from Mahajak’s village store.
As I got close I was delighted to see the lovely Shula closing up and Geoff somehow faded from my thoughts.
“Hello Shushu” I called as I approached
“Oh Simon” she said flustered, not quite knowing what to do or where to look.
“Where is everyone?” I asked, I knew Omid was in hospital though I didn’t know why
“Anjuli is visiting Omid at the hospital and I let Maisie finish early to see the fireworks” Shula said, “she works very hard, so I’m closing up on my own tonight”
“Let me help” I offered
“Thank you Simon,” she said smiling coyly
Between the two of us we soon made light work of it and when the last stack of plastic goods went in through the door I stood in the doorway and said
“Well that’s everything”
“Thank you Simon” she said and beamed a beautiful smile
“If there’s nothing else to do I’ll be going” I said and the smile left her face
“No, no” she said “come in, come in”
And she pushed me forcefully aside so she could close the door
“You must have a hot drink” she insisted, “You must be very cold, come, come”
This was a side of her I had never seen.
She led me behind the counter and through the bead curtain to the inner sanctum, which consisted of a small kitchen and a sitting room with two armchairs on one side and piles of boxes on the other, a rather dull and dingy place to be perfectly honest though brightened considerably by the lovely Shula who was at the sink filling the kettle.
I didn’t think she wanted a hot drink anymore than I did so I walked up behind her and put my hands where I approximated her waist to be and breathed in her perfume as I kissed her ear and neck
“Oh Simon” she sighed
I was standing so close behind her that her pert buttocks were pressed against me
“I don’t really want a hot drink,” I said
“Ok” she said and put the kettle down before turning to face me
“Perhaps you would like a soft drink or a beer” she suggested
I ignored her and before she could speak again I kissed her and the moment my lips touched hers she locked onto my mouth like a limpet and her arms gripped me around the neck like a bear trap.
It was a warm liquid kiss with hot tongues of passion.
My hands caressed up and down her skinny frame repeatedly searching the landscape for obstacles before both hands ended up on her tight little buttocks.
I had often perused Shula and her garb, which appeared to be seamless and attached in someway to her lower legs. I had absolutely no expertise of the kind of garment she was wearing and I didn’t know my way in so I maneuvered her towards one of the armchairs and as I sat down I pulled her down with me,
Because she was so tall her head was above me, kissing down into my mouth, her tongue like a striking serpent in and out of mine, lips still locked limpet like on mine, nostrils snorting in air.
I now had one arm around her shoulder and the opposite hand on her waist which I slid slowly up to her breast; she drew in a sharp sighing breath through her nose as I fondled her titty through the fabric of her robes and the bra beneath and the moment my palm cupped her plump fruit our mouths disengaged briefly and she gave me a toothy smile before locking onto me again.
I fondled her little tit for a few minutes, which felt really nice but I wanted more.
So my hand left her breast and went slowly down to her thigh and knowing what was coming she wrapped her arms tightly around me and buried her face in my neck.
Her body stiffened as my hand progressed but she didn’t resist or halt my progress as my hand disappeared inside the folds of her robes between her thighs I could feel her firm thigh through the cloth before I moved quickly upward until I could feel her prominent mound then I slid my finger down and frigged her roughly through the fabric and she let out a little “Hmmm” of pleasure at my touch.
But abruptly sat upright, before reaching down to the hem of her robe and after a few moments grabbed handfuls of cloth and dragged it up to her now naked knees.
Shula looked at me and smiled coyly before nuzzling my neck again.
I moved my playful hand down from the seat of her heat to her naked knees and her body stiffened as my hand progressed up her inner thigh.
My fingers then disappeared beneath the massed folds of her robe until they reached the top of her thigh.
She squirmed on my lap and murmured as I entered her panties and my fingers were amongst the coarse hair of her Minge.
She moaned softly as they explored her bush and dallied on her prominent mound and when my digits descended into to the abyss of her creamy cunny she let out a hoary growl as I fingered her hot syrupy slit and stimulated her clit she let out a little
“Ohhhhhh” of pleasure at my touch and grabbed a cushion to bury her face in to stifle any further exclamation, of which there would be many so I stopped stroking her gorgeous wet pussy and took the cushion from her and discarded it.
She looked startled
“I want to hear every sound you make Shushu” I said and kissed her
“Every moan and murmur”
Then she looked at me and smiled as I resumed stroking her juicy cunny I looked at her face and delighted at every moan and grunt she made as each stoke of her clit brought her closer and closer to orgasm until finally she screamed out as she came beneath my touch, so loud that even the cushion wouldn’t have suppressed it,
Her thigh’s closed on my hand at the point of climax trapping my hand but my fingers were still between her lips and I stroked her clit again and again and her thighs opened and closed on my hand then she screamed again and kissed me on the mouth.
Then with no hint of the shyness she showed earlier she stood up and taking my hand almost dragged me towards the stairs.
I paused briefly on the bottom stair
“Are you sure?” I asked knowing the answer
“Yes, yes, yes” she said through gritted teeth and began pulling me up stairs
I followed her up the stairs at pace and on arriving in the upstairs accommodation I was struck with the luxurious contrast from the downstairs, but my mind didn’t dwell on the decor as all the blood from my brain had long since journeyed to my cock.
Shula continued dragging me until we were in her bedroom and after a quick glance at the double divan I determined it to be the marital bed.
Now a philanderer I might be and I may also occasionally shag married women but I do have standards and I never do it in the husband’s bed.
At that precise moment the massed folds of cloth that had prior to that moment cloaked her skinny frame dropped to the floor leaving her wearing only a white bra and panties, sandals and a crucifix around her neck.
And I thought what the hell it’s not a hard and fast rule,
I stared at the white of her underwear and marveled as it showed in stark contrast with her chocolate coloured skin
At that moment Shula's slim fingers reached up to unfasten the catch on her bra and my hands reached around to replace the lace and cupped her beautiful chocolate confections.
And as my hand groped her naked breasts and played with her hardening nipples I kissed her neck and as I looked down I could see them quivering before my libidinous eyes like little brown muffins topped by the now swollen dark chocolate nipples.
When I began tiring of her titties I let one hand drift down her belly and I slipped my fingers under the waistband of knickers and bypassing her substantial thicket I began frigging her juicy pussy once more and before long as her legs began to buckle she screamed again as she climaxed.
Shula turned around and kissed me and rubbed the lump in my trousers with her long boney fingers.
I started undoing my belt and she stepped back and stood licking her lips as she watched.
“Knickers off Shushu” I told her and she complied immediately without a second thought and no hint of shyness and then she resumed her libidinous sentry duty.
I let my trousers drop to the ground and then pulled my pants down to expose my swollen cock and she stared at it with her big black eyes as she sat down on the bed and as I pulled on my shaft to expose my purple helmet they almost popped out of her head.
I quickly removed the rest of my clothes and she eyed me up and down appraising what she was about to receive.
“Are you ready?” I asked and she just nodded wide-eyed and open mouthed
I did think about slipping my cock into her half open mouth but I was ready to go and we could save that for another day.
So instead I leant down and slipped my tongue into her mouth instead and as we kissed I picked her up and then threw her gently onto the middle of the bed and before she’d finished bouncing I was there between her skinny legs and pausing for just a second to push her skinny thighs further apart my cock was inside her.
And she was blissfully tight and I thought as I thrust into her up to my balls that Omid must be hung like a mouse not to have stretched her pussy by now but I wasn’t complaining.
Shula was loving every stroke and she made no attempt to stifle or muffle the grateful moans and screams.
I raised my torso up so I could look at her gorgeous body writhing beneath me.
Her head thrashed from side to side but this did not distract me from staring at Shushu’s tits separated by her crucifix, which rolled back and forth in synch.
Her big black eyes never left my naked torso until I raised my self up higher so I could look down at her wild black bush and she lifted her head off the pillow to watch my pink prick repeatedly penetrating her tight brown pussy.
Then she looked at me and smiled but I knew I had to finish her with my shaft very soon because Aunt Anjuli would soon return from the hospital.
So I mercilessly pumped on her faster and faster until I couldn’t tell when one moan ended and the next began until she let out one almighty scream as she came and then two more stokes and I release my hot load into her.
As I was dressing I watched as she redressed her lovely body in her white robe, the fullness of her titties hard to disguise and her chocolate nipples were clearly visible thought the fabric.
When we were back downstairs in the shop we had an affectionate farewell kiss and I had another good grope of her tits.
“No more” Shula gave me a playful slap and said “tomorrow” which was both a statement and a question
We kissed once more before I opened the door and headed home.
I had only gone about fifty yards when a taxi passed me with Anjuli in the back.
“That was close,” I said out loud
The fact that Georgia wouldn’t be home until Christmas and we had agreed to keep contact to a minimum meant no lies and no broken promises.
All the time Georgia and I had been together, in fact ever since she set her cap at me back in May she had me heart and soul exclusively but not so my body.
But since she delivered her ultimatum, the threat of losing her love had been hanging over my head like the sword of Damocles.
Now I couldn’t believe it, I was off the hook; I no longer had to curb my appetites, as there was no apparent consequence to my actions.
So could I relax? Did I have to change? And if I didn’t have to change, could I change.
Well the lack of apparent consequences resulted in my treating myself to some Halloween over indulgence.
Following on from my Halloween hat trick with Jen on Saturday night I got to have her best friend Ellie on Halloween itself.
Traditionally it has never been my favourite holiday, as the Americans would say, however, never before have I been able to enjoy two such choice candies as Jenny and Emily, who certainly both did the trick and were a real treat.
I didn’t know it at the time but that Halloween was the last time I would get to enjoy the pleasures of Jenny Smithson though the little witch Emily Gomez would remain a frequent flyer.
But after having Emily I’m not sure I didn’t feel guiltier with the ultimatum suspended and not being under scrutiny, than I did when I was under threat.
Of course I always felt guilty after such lustful interactions, and this occasion was no different, and I always swore to myself not to do it again, again this time was no different.
But at the time, I perform my philandering betrayals without a second thought for the woman I love, and love her I most certainly do.
But with every pleasure there is a pain I just haven’t felt it yet.
So after mulling over everything for the umpteenth time I had decided that I would treat the temporary separation as an amnesty.
I could spend the next two months shagging everything with a pulse and I wouldn’t have to worry.
I wouldn’t be seeing Georgia so I wouldn’t have to lie to her so
I could do what I wanted or who I wanted between Halloween and Christmas
But I decided that I would not go looking for crumpet, I would not frequent pick up places, I would not hunt for wenches, but if some suitable choice titbits fell across my path who were in playful mood they would be considered fare game and sin free.
I made this decision knowing full well that the chance of me getting to Christmas with my balls dry was remote at best.
There were always opportunities of available skirt come December or put another way there were always plenty of chances to come in December with the available skirt.
Then in January it would be a case of New Year new me.
So with my old chap still tingling at the thought of my Halloween recollections I thought to myself.
“I hope Guy Fawkes Night goes with as big a bang as Halloween”
Since I first transcribed Gerald Overend’s tapes I had rather let things slip it was now the first day of November and a month had elapsed since the grieving widow entrusted the tapes to me.
So I determined my task for November was to begin in earnest my efforts to fulfil my promise to Eleanor.
I had already roughly transcribed the tapes a month earlier and now decided to choose one story and hone it into a something that was as credible and colourful as Gerald’s spoken words, and yet suitable for publication.
It was the first piece I had written for some considerable time that was not tantamount to pornography.
I spent considerably more time on this one story that I ever did on my own creations and when it was edited and polished I emailed it to my publisher Gordon Bramstock.
Gay Gordon replied later that day to say he enjoyed the story very much but it wasn’t something he was interested in, he preferred more salacious material, however he did give me the names of three publishers who might be interested.
So I called my agent Lionel Blum intending to put him to work, but he was meeting another client in Godalming so I left him a voice mail.
When he returned my call we arranged to meet for a drink in Guildford the next day.
As I walked towards the station, I checked my watch and found I had plenty of time to call in to Mahajak’s, the village shop and see the lovely Shulah.
The shop was owned and run by Omid although it was his young wife Shulah and her Aunt Anjuli who did all the work.
He was a surly old goat and old enough to be her father in fact he was old enough to be my father.
Shulah and her Aunt though were both lovely, Shushu was a few years younger than me, tall and slim but her thick back-combed hair made her look even taller.
She was a Skinny girl but not in a boney way she just had a skinny frame I was sure she would be extremely flexible in the clinches.
Her eyes were big and almost black and she had a huge toothy smile, which lit up the whole shop if not the village.
The rest of her figure was concealed beneath a loose fitting robe affair, but I knew what pert little breasts she had hidden under there after a close encounter in the unisex changing room at the swimming pool, where I had a delightful taster of what might be, when my hands explored inside her costume.
I had hopes that I might become better acquainted with her treasures.
I have always flirted dreadfully with her and her aunt and they always flirted back.
That day was no exception Shula was in the shop I brushed passed her very closely.
“Morning Shula” I said and she instantly got very flustered
“Oh, oh, good morning Simon” she said and moved awkwardly to the counter
“Hello Anjuli” I said to her aunt who blushed and giggled
As usual when it came time to pay, on this occasion for a newspaper, there was a lingering exchange where our hands almost touched but didn’t quite but then I caressed her hand with my thumb and brushed my fingertips against hers and she smiled a broad toothy smile and blushed.
“Bye Shushu” I said and winked at her and turned and walked away to catch my train.
When I was on the train Lionel rang me and said he would pick me up at the station.
We found a nice pub in Godalming and over a drink I explained what I wanted to do, but I made it perfectly clear that he would only get half his normal commission, as the proceeds would be going to charity.
Despite his having to take a cut in commission he cheerfully agreed.
I got home mid afternoon and had just sat down with a drink when the phone rang.
I was a little fed up, it was like they knew, as if there was a sensor in the chair and as soon as my arse hit the cushion the phone would ring or the doorbell would sound, it was a conspiracy.
“Hello” I said abruptly
“Hello Simon” said a hoarse voice “its Laura”
It’s just as well she clarified because I would never have recognised her voice.
My initial anger at being disturbed melted away when I realised Laura had the flu.
“Hello Laura” I said, “you don’t sound too good”
“It’s the flu I’m afraid” Laura said, “Could I ask a favour”?
“Of course” I replied
“Geoff has to work late and the twins are desperate to see the firework display tonight”
“And you would like me to take them”? I interrupted
“Would you?” she said
“What time would you like me?”
I picked the girls up at six and Laura couldn’t thank me enough for stepping in.
Lisa and Julie were incredibly excited in that way that only eight-year-old girls can be.
The firework display was to take place in long field, which ran between the railway line and the main road on the other side of the tracks from the village proper.
Apart from the fireworks and the obligatory bonfire, there were also the usual assortments of amusements, darts, shooting galleries, bingo that kind of thing. And I think the girls where looking forward to them as much as fireworks themselves.
By the time we had to take up position for the display they had both won something on their own and I had won them both a cuddly toy on the shooting gallery when we decided there was just time for one more hotdog before the fireworks.
By the time it was all over, between the games and the food I was pretty much cleaned out.
But I hadn’t had that much fun with my clothes on for a good long while so it was worth every penny.
I had taken some good shots of the pair of them on my phone playing various amusements and they took some of me and I got them to send them to Georgia.
With the smoke from the display still thick in the air I walked the twins to their house and as we were approaching, the front door opened and Geoff was standing there waiting.
“Dad, Dad” they cried running up the drive “look what we’ve got”
I didn’t know where they got the energy from but I was knackered but eventually the excited twins went inside
“Don’t wake mum” Geoffrey called to them before turning to me and shaking my hand
“Thank you so much Simon, Laura really isn’t well”
“It was a pleasure” I said “I’ve really enjoyed myself, and I’m not just saying that”
“Will you come in for nip?” he asked
“I won’t if you don’t mind, I’m shattered” I replied
“Another time then” Geoff said
I wondered on my way home if I should have gone in for that drink, when I thought about it I was left with the impression he may have wanted to talk about something.
Just as I was walking past the station and I had resolved to pop round for a chat with him over the next few days I noticed the lights from Mahajak’s village store.
As I got close I was delighted to see the lovely Shula closing up and Geoff somehow faded from my thoughts.
“Hello Shushu” I called as I approached
“Oh Simon” she said flustered, not quite knowing what to do or where to look.
“Where is everyone?” I asked, I knew Omid was in hospital though I didn’t know why
“Anjuli is visiting Omid at the hospital and I let Maisie finish early to see the fireworks” Shula said, “she works very hard, so I’m closing up on my own tonight”
“Let me help” I offered
“Thank you Simon,” she said smiling coyly
Between the two of us we soon made light work of it and when the last stack of plastic goods went in through the door I stood in the doorway and said
“Well that’s everything”
“Thank you Simon” she said and beamed a beautiful smile
“If there’s nothing else to do I’ll be going” I said and the smile left her face
“No, no” she said “come in, come in”
And she pushed me forcefully aside so she could close the door
“You must have a hot drink” she insisted, “You must be very cold, come, come”
This was a side of her I had never seen.
She led me behind the counter and through the bead curtain to the inner sanctum, which consisted of a small kitchen and a sitting room with two armchairs on one side and piles of boxes on the other, a rather dull and dingy place to be perfectly honest though brightened considerably by the lovely Shula who was at the sink filling the kettle.
I didn’t think she wanted a hot drink anymore than I did so I walked up behind her and put my hands where I approximated her waist to be and breathed in her perfume as I kissed her ear and neck
“Oh Simon” she sighed
I was standing so close behind her that her pert buttocks were pressed against me
“I don’t really want a hot drink,” I said
“Ok” she said and put the kettle down before turning to face me
“Perhaps you would like a soft drink or a beer” she suggested
I ignored her and before she could speak again I kissed her and the moment my lips touched hers she locked onto my mouth like a limpet and her arms gripped me around the neck like a bear trap.
It was a warm liquid kiss with hot tongues of passion.
My hands caressed up and down her skinny frame repeatedly searching the landscape for obstacles before both hands ended up on her tight little buttocks.
I had often perused Shula and her garb, which appeared to be seamless and attached in someway to her lower legs. I had absolutely no expertise of the kind of garment she was wearing and I didn’t know my way in so I maneuvered her towards one of the armchairs and as I sat down I pulled her down with me,
Because she was so tall her head was above me, kissing down into my mouth, her tongue like a striking serpent in and out of mine, lips still locked limpet like on mine, nostrils snorting in air.
I now had one arm around her shoulder and the opposite hand on her waist which I slid slowly up to her breast; she drew in a sharp sighing breath through her nose as I fondled her titty through the fabric of her robes and the bra beneath and the moment my palm cupped her plump fruit our mouths disengaged briefly and she gave me a toothy smile before locking onto me again.
I fondled her little tit for a few minutes, which felt really nice but I wanted more.
So my hand left her breast and went slowly down to her thigh and knowing what was coming she wrapped her arms tightly around me and buried her face in my neck.
Her body stiffened as my hand progressed but she didn’t resist or halt my progress as my hand disappeared inside the folds of her robes between her thighs I could feel her firm thigh through the cloth before I moved quickly upward until I could feel her prominent mound then I slid my finger down and frigged her roughly through the fabric and she let out a little “Hmmm” of pleasure at my touch.
But abruptly sat upright, before reaching down to the hem of her robe and after a few moments grabbed handfuls of cloth and dragged it up to her now naked knees.
Shula looked at me and smiled coyly before nuzzling my neck again.
I moved my playful hand down from the seat of her heat to her naked knees and her body stiffened as my hand progressed up her inner thigh.
My fingers then disappeared beneath the massed folds of her robe until they reached the top of her thigh.
She squirmed on my lap and murmured as I entered her panties and my fingers were amongst the coarse hair of her Minge.
She moaned softly as they explored her bush and dallied on her prominent mound and when my digits descended into to the abyss of her creamy cunny she let out a hoary growl as I fingered her hot syrupy slit and stimulated her clit she let out a little
“Ohhhhhh” of pleasure at my touch and grabbed a cushion to bury her face in to stifle any further exclamation, of which there would be many so I stopped stroking her gorgeous wet pussy and took the cushion from her and discarded it.
She looked startled
“I want to hear every sound you make Shushu” I said and kissed her
“Every moan and murmur”
Then she looked at me and smiled as I resumed stroking her juicy cunny I looked at her face and delighted at every moan and grunt she made as each stoke of her clit brought her closer and closer to orgasm until finally she screamed out as she came beneath my touch, so loud that even the cushion wouldn’t have suppressed it,
Her thigh’s closed on my hand at the point of climax trapping my hand but my fingers were still between her lips and I stroked her clit again and again and her thighs opened and closed on my hand then she screamed again and kissed me on the mouth.
Then with no hint of the shyness she showed earlier she stood up and taking my hand almost dragged me towards the stairs.
I paused briefly on the bottom stair
“Are you sure?” I asked knowing the answer
“Yes, yes, yes” she said through gritted teeth and began pulling me up stairs
I followed her up the stairs at pace and on arriving in the upstairs accommodation I was struck with the luxurious contrast from the downstairs, but my mind didn’t dwell on the decor as all the blood from my brain had long since journeyed to my cock.
Shula continued dragging me until we were in her bedroom and after a quick glance at the double divan I determined it to be the marital bed.
Now a philanderer I might be and I may also occasionally shag married women but I do have standards and I never do it in the husband’s bed.
At that precise moment the massed folds of cloth that had prior to that moment cloaked her skinny frame dropped to the floor leaving her wearing only a white bra and panties, sandals and a crucifix around her neck.
And I thought what the hell it’s not a hard and fast rule,
I stared at the white of her underwear and marveled as it showed in stark contrast with her chocolate coloured skin
At that moment Shula's slim fingers reached up to unfasten the catch on her bra and my hands reached around to replace the lace and cupped her beautiful chocolate confections.
And as my hand groped her naked breasts and played with her hardening nipples I kissed her neck and as I looked down I could see them quivering before my libidinous eyes like little brown muffins topped by the now swollen dark chocolate nipples.
When I began tiring of her titties I let one hand drift down her belly and I slipped my fingers under the waistband of knickers and bypassing her substantial thicket I began frigging her juicy pussy once more and before long as her legs began to buckle she screamed again as she climaxed.
Shula turned around and kissed me and rubbed the lump in my trousers with her long boney fingers.
I started undoing my belt and she stepped back and stood licking her lips as she watched.
“Knickers off Shushu” I told her and she complied immediately without a second thought and no hint of shyness and then she resumed her libidinous sentry duty.
I let my trousers drop to the ground and then pulled my pants down to expose my swollen cock and she stared at it with her big black eyes as she sat down on the bed and as I pulled on my shaft to expose my purple helmet they almost popped out of her head.
I quickly removed the rest of my clothes and she eyed me up and down appraising what she was about to receive.
“Are you ready?” I asked and she just nodded wide-eyed and open mouthed
I did think about slipping my cock into her half open mouth but I was ready to go and we could save that for another day.
So instead I leant down and slipped my tongue into her mouth instead and as we kissed I picked her up and then threw her gently onto the middle of the bed and before she’d finished bouncing I was there between her skinny legs and pausing for just a second to push her skinny thighs further apart my cock was inside her.
And she was blissfully tight and I thought as I thrust into her up to my balls that Omid must be hung like a mouse not to have stretched her pussy by now but I wasn’t complaining.
Shula was loving every stroke and she made no attempt to stifle or muffle the grateful moans and screams.
I raised my torso up so I could look at her gorgeous body writhing beneath me.
Her head thrashed from side to side but this did not distract me from staring at Shushu’s tits separated by her crucifix, which rolled back and forth in synch.
Her big black eyes never left my naked torso until I raised my self up higher so I could look down at her wild black bush and she lifted her head off the pillow to watch my pink prick repeatedly penetrating her tight brown pussy.
Then she looked at me and smiled but I knew I had to finish her with my shaft very soon because Aunt Anjuli would soon return from the hospital.
So I mercilessly pumped on her faster and faster until I couldn’t tell when one moan ended and the next began until she let out one almighty scream as she came and then two more stokes and I release my hot load into her.
As I was dressing I watched as she redressed her lovely body in her white robe, the fullness of her titties hard to disguise and her chocolate nipples were clearly visible thought the fabric.
When we were back downstairs in the shop we had an affectionate farewell kiss and I had another good grope of her tits.
“No more” Shula gave me a playful slap and said “tomorrow” which was both a statement and a question
We kissed once more before I opened the door and headed home.
I had only gone about fifty yards when a taxi passed me with Anjuli in the back.
“That was close,” I said out loud
A CHRISTMAS SELECTION # 3
CHRISTMAS GREEN
The Christmas green
Festively untypical
It’s just a club moss
With creeping stems
Similar to ferns
With erect branches
It has no scarlet hues
Nor star shaped flowers
It’s quite unremarkably
Just another evergreen
NOW THAT IT'S CHRISTMAS # 2
Now that it's Christmas
It makes me kind of glum
To do all the things
I used to do with mum
But when I feel her beside me
Then I don’t feel so glum
THE BAUBLE AND THE BELL
The bauble and the bell
The tinsel star as well
The angel with its wings
The shepherds and the Kings
The tree’s coloured lights
The tinsel sparkling bright
The garlands hanging high
So pleasing to the eye
These are the things
That Christmas time brings
WHATEVER FUTURE GIFTS
Whatever future gifts
That might make me glad
Or any from the past
Including when I was a lad
There is nothing to compare
To the gift of being a Dad
LEADING UP TO CHRISTMAS DAY
Leading up to Christmas day
Happy Christmas you should say
But so often it goes unsaid,
People say happy holidays instead
CHRISTMAS FERN
Christmas ferns
Abundant and evergreen
With Pinnate leaves
In lance-shaped fronds
Dense clusters of
Featherlike leaflets
In wide display
Decorate the
Christmas landscape
Of North America
CHRISTMAS IS SPECIAL
Christmas is special
And you are the reason
Your touch adds lustre
To the festive season
YOU LOOK UPON CHRISTMAS
You look upon Christmas
As just another of your duties
And over the years
You’ve given us some beauties
You don’t think that it’s Special
It’s just something that you do
But Christmas doesn’t just happen
It’s made piece by piece by you
Everything that is Christmas
When all said and done
Is completely down to you
So Happy Christmas Mum
DON’T THINK WE HAVEN’T NOTICED
Don’t think we haven’t noticed
Just because we haven’t said
But we know that compliments
Are something that you dread
You’ve made a perfect Christmas
With your own fair hands
You thought of every detail
In your carefully made plans
We’ve enjoyed every moment
All the festivities and fun
So although you’ll be embarrassed
Thanks for Christmas mum
IT’S ALL DOWN TO YOU
It’s all down to you
You are the number one
Thanks for everything
For another job well done
You’re the best of the best
Happy Christmas Mum
The Christmas green
Festively untypical
It’s just a club moss
With creeping stems
Similar to ferns
With erect branches
It has no scarlet hues
Nor star shaped flowers
It’s quite unremarkably
Just another evergreen
NOW THAT IT'S CHRISTMAS # 2
Now that it's Christmas
It makes me kind of glum
To do all the things
I used to do with mum
But when I feel her beside me
Then I don’t feel so glum
THE BAUBLE AND THE BELL
The bauble and the bell
The tinsel star as well
The angel with its wings
The shepherds and the Kings
The tree’s coloured lights
The tinsel sparkling bright
The garlands hanging high
So pleasing to the eye
These are the things
That Christmas time brings
WHATEVER FUTURE GIFTS
Whatever future gifts
That might make me glad
Or any from the past
Including when I was a lad
There is nothing to compare
To the gift of being a Dad
LEADING UP TO CHRISTMAS DAY
Leading up to Christmas day
Happy Christmas you should say
But so often it goes unsaid,
People say happy holidays instead
CHRISTMAS FERN
Christmas ferns
Abundant and evergreen
With Pinnate leaves
In lance-shaped fronds
Dense clusters of
Featherlike leaflets
In wide display
Decorate the
Christmas landscape
Of North America
CHRISTMAS IS SPECIAL
Christmas is special
And you are the reason
Your touch adds lustre
To the festive season
YOU LOOK UPON CHRISTMAS
You look upon Christmas
As just another of your duties
And over the years
You’ve given us some beauties
You don’t think that it’s Special
It’s just something that you do
But Christmas doesn’t just happen
It’s made piece by piece by you
Everything that is Christmas
When all said and done
Is completely down to you
So Happy Christmas Mum
DON’T THINK WE HAVEN’T NOTICED
Don’t think we haven’t noticed
Just because we haven’t said
But we know that compliments
Are something that you dread
You’ve made a perfect Christmas
With your own fair hands
You thought of every detail
In your carefully made plans
We’ve enjoyed every moment
All the festivities and fun
So although you’ll be embarrassed
Thanks for Christmas mum
IT’S ALL DOWN TO YOU
It’s all down to you
You are the number one
Thanks for everything
For another job well done
You’re the best of the best
Happy Christmas Mum
ARE YOU WEARING FOR CHRISTMAS # 3
ARE YOU WEARING IT FOR A REASON?
Are you wearing it for a reason?
Is it because of the festive season?
You won’t be kissed under the mistletoe
Because you’re wearing it too low
ARE YOU WEARING IT THE RIGHT WAY?
Are you wearing it the right way?
I heard the pretty girl say
Should it be tied like so?
For kissing under the mistletoe
Am I showing my naïveté?
In the most embarrassing way
It’s just that I kind of felt
It shouldn’t be tied on your belt
ARE YOU WEARING TINSEL IN YOUR HAIR?
Are you wearing tinsel in your hair?
Sitting atop your golden curls
You look so very angelic to me
A jewel more precious than pearls
But looks can be deceiving
Angel with the golden curls
And later on I might well discover
You’re one of the naughty girls
ARE YOU WEARING XMAS TIGHTS?
Are you wearing Xmas tights?
Oh how they are exciting me
Adorned with a festive motif
What a Christmas this will be
ARE YOU WEARING CHRISTMAS DRAWERS?
Are you wearing Christmas drawers?
I would like a look at yours
I bet a pound to a penny
You’re not wearing any
There we have it at last
You are as I thought bare arsed
Of course it makes you look loose
Even if you have an excuse
Well that really is shocking
You’re supposed to hang a stocking
ARE YOU WEARING REINDEER ANTLERS?
Are you wearing Reindeer antlers?
Well not the most original twist
You’ve been making rather merry
More Christmas spirit than you could resist
What exactly am I suggesting?
A little too much wine would be the gist
What makes me think that?
Well I’ll tell you if you insist
Apart from the slurred speech
You are walking with a starboard list
And your antlers sit in disarray
So that’s how I know you’re pissed
ARE YOU WEARING A SANTA OUTFIT?
Are you wearing a Santa outfit?
Does it come with all the kit?
The boots and beard and hat
And padding to make you look fat
I didn’t believe in Santa anymore
Now I see you and I think phwor
Are you wearing it for a reason?
Is it because of the festive season?
You won’t be kissed under the mistletoe
Because you’re wearing it too low
ARE YOU WEARING IT THE RIGHT WAY?
Are you wearing it the right way?
I heard the pretty girl say
Should it be tied like so?
For kissing under the mistletoe
Am I showing my naïveté?
In the most embarrassing way
It’s just that I kind of felt
It shouldn’t be tied on your belt
ARE YOU WEARING TINSEL IN YOUR HAIR?
Are you wearing tinsel in your hair?
Sitting atop your golden curls
You look so very angelic to me
A jewel more precious than pearls
But looks can be deceiving
Angel with the golden curls
And later on I might well discover
You’re one of the naughty girls
ARE YOU WEARING XMAS TIGHTS?
Are you wearing Xmas tights?
Oh how they are exciting me
Adorned with a festive motif
What a Christmas this will be
ARE YOU WEARING CHRISTMAS DRAWERS?
Are you wearing Christmas drawers?
I would like a look at yours
I bet a pound to a penny
You’re not wearing any
There we have it at last
You are as I thought bare arsed
Of course it makes you look loose
Even if you have an excuse
Well that really is shocking
You’re supposed to hang a stocking
ARE YOU WEARING REINDEER ANTLERS?
Are you wearing Reindeer antlers?
Well not the most original twist
You’ve been making rather merry
More Christmas spirit than you could resist
What exactly am I suggesting?
A little too much wine would be the gist
What makes me think that?
Well I’ll tell you if you insist
Apart from the slurred speech
You are walking with a starboard list
And your antlers sit in disarray
So that’s how I know you’re pissed
ARE YOU WEARING A SANTA OUTFIT?
Are you wearing a Santa outfit?
Does it come with all the kit?
The boots and beard and hat
And padding to make you look fat
I didn’t believe in Santa anymore
Now I see you and I think phwor
Christmas Humour # 3
CHAVS CHRISTMAS # 2
I kept Lily home from school
For Christmas shopping
Because it’s the very best time
To get all the presents on the list
Especially when you believe
That shoplifting isn’t a crime
IS SANTA CLAUS REALLY A WOMAN # 3
Is Santa Claus really a woman?
Let’s silence those objections
How would he navigate the globe?
And all its many intersections
When a man is totally incapable
Of ever asking for directions
MY WORST CHRISTMAS PRESENT EVER # 1
My worst Christmas present ever
I thought I would be lucky to receive
It was big and so full of possibilities
But it really flattered to deceive
Beneath the coloured paper
That hinted at hidden promise
It turned out to be a cardboard box
Containing only emptiness
My mum was watching me intently
And my disappointment hurt her
My cheapskate dad then told me
It was an Action Man deserter
I'VE ALWAYS LOVED MY SANTA # 1
I've always loved my Santa
In his Red Velvet suit
With his long white beard
And cheeks all rosy and cute
His deep throated laughter
All happy and jolly
And he loves his naughty
Little Miss Molly
AT THE ANNUAL CHRISTMAS BINGE
Well at the end of the year
Its managements’ biggest fear
That staff should infringe
At the annual Christmas Binge
After spiking the fruit punch
In the canteen after lunch
Their totally off their hinge
At the annual Christmas Binge
The amount of alcohol downed
As many a sorrow was drowned
Made the accountant whinge
At the annual Christmas Binge
The extent of the revelling
Was quite frankly bedevilling
Enough for his beard to singe
At the annual Christmas Binge
The things that a little party ho
Did beneath the mistletoe
Would make a puritan cringe
At the annual Christmas Binge
Karen from reception bless her
Botox-ed her face with vodka
With a catering syringe
At the annual Christmas Binge
The level of fraternization
Was quite a revelation
And caused a few backs to twinge
At the annual Christmas Binge
You may well be forgiven
After the events which had arisen
That it was the lunatic fringe
At their annual Christmas Binge
Next day when the party was over
Everyone suffered from a hangover
And all took on an earthy tinge
The day after the Christmas binge
THE FESTIVE INTERVAL
When celebrating
The festive interval
Please refrain from calling it
The winterval
SCROOGE LIKE
They say the perfect Christmas
Is blessed with family and friends
I say the fewer the better
Otherwise the present buying never ends
SHOPS IN THE HIGH STREET
Shops in the high street
Are full to overflowing
With irate customers
Franticly to-ing and fro-ing
The shopkeeper delights
While prices are rocketing
Happy in the knowledge
Of the profits he’s pocketing
And in his smug contentment
He rubs his hands with glee
“Merry Christmas you mugs
And a prosperous new year, for me”
RUSH AND SCURRY
Hurry, hurry shopping in Surrey
Hurry, hurry, rush and scurry
Worry, worry, fresh snow flurry
Hurry Murray rush and scurry
Let’s get home and have a curry
AS WE APPROACH ANOTHER YULE
As we approach another Yule
Its time I went off on the pull
Looking for a Christmas honey
Someone attractive and funny
And if I manage to attract her
I will pull a Christmas cracker
IS SANTA CLAUS REALLY A WOMAN # 4
Is Santa Claus really a woman?
Why are we having this debate?
If Santa was a woman
How would she navigate?
My wife got lost last week
In a car park in Ramsgate
I kept Lily home from school
For Christmas shopping
Because it’s the very best time
To get all the presents on the list
Especially when you believe
That shoplifting isn’t a crime
IS SANTA CLAUS REALLY A WOMAN # 3
Is Santa Claus really a woman?
Let’s silence those objections
How would he navigate the globe?
And all its many intersections
When a man is totally incapable
Of ever asking for directions
MY WORST CHRISTMAS PRESENT EVER # 1
My worst Christmas present ever
I thought I would be lucky to receive
It was big and so full of possibilities
But it really flattered to deceive
Beneath the coloured paper
That hinted at hidden promise
It turned out to be a cardboard box
Containing only emptiness
My mum was watching me intently
And my disappointment hurt her
My cheapskate dad then told me
It was an Action Man deserter
I'VE ALWAYS LOVED MY SANTA # 1
I've always loved my Santa
In his Red Velvet suit
With his long white beard
And cheeks all rosy and cute
His deep throated laughter
All happy and jolly
And he loves his naughty
Little Miss Molly
AT THE ANNUAL CHRISTMAS BINGE
Well at the end of the year
Its managements’ biggest fear
That staff should infringe
At the annual Christmas Binge
After spiking the fruit punch
In the canteen after lunch
Their totally off their hinge
At the annual Christmas Binge
The amount of alcohol downed
As many a sorrow was drowned
Made the accountant whinge
At the annual Christmas Binge
The extent of the revelling
Was quite frankly bedevilling
Enough for his beard to singe
At the annual Christmas Binge
The things that a little party ho
Did beneath the mistletoe
Would make a puritan cringe
At the annual Christmas Binge
Karen from reception bless her
Botox-ed her face with vodka
With a catering syringe
At the annual Christmas Binge
The level of fraternization
Was quite a revelation
And caused a few backs to twinge
At the annual Christmas Binge
You may well be forgiven
After the events which had arisen
That it was the lunatic fringe
At their annual Christmas Binge
Next day when the party was over
Everyone suffered from a hangover
And all took on an earthy tinge
The day after the Christmas binge
THE FESTIVE INTERVAL
When celebrating
The festive interval
Please refrain from calling it
The winterval
SCROOGE LIKE
They say the perfect Christmas
Is blessed with family and friends
I say the fewer the better
Otherwise the present buying never ends
SHOPS IN THE HIGH STREET
Shops in the high street
Are full to overflowing
With irate customers
Franticly to-ing and fro-ing
The shopkeeper delights
While prices are rocketing
Happy in the knowledge
Of the profits he’s pocketing
And in his smug contentment
He rubs his hands with glee
“Merry Christmas you mugs
And a prosperous new year, for me”
RUSH AND SCURRY
Hurry, hurry shopping in Surrey
Hurry, hurry, rush and scurry
Worry, worry, fresh snow flurry
Hurry Murray rush and scurry
Let’s get home and have a curry
AS WE APPROACH ANOTHER YULE
As we approach another Yule
Its time I went off on the pull
Looking for a Christmas honey
Someone attractive and funny
And if I manage to attract her
I will pull a Christmas cracker
IS SANTA CLAUS REALLY A WOMAN # 4
Is Santa Claus really a woman?
Why are we having this debate?
If Santa was a woman
How would she navigate?
My wife got lost last week
In a car park in Ramsgate
Thursday, 29 November 2012
CHRISTMAS LOVE SELECTION # 2
I LOVE THE FESTIVE SEASON
I love the festive season
When it’s cold and freezing
Then my favourite thing to do
Is to cuddle up close to you
DARLING I LOVE YOU
Each and every day
I say these words to you
Darling I love you
Then every Christmas
I say these words to you
Merry Christmas Darling I love you
And every New Year
I say these words to you
Happy New Year Darling I love you
And every time I say it
You look at me and say
Whatever
THIS WISH, I WISH
This wish I wish,
Is a wish for you,
The wish is for me
The wish is for you
The wish, I wish
Is a wish for you,
Don’t you see?
The wish is for you
That’s what I wish
I wish only for you
CRIMBLE LOVE
It has taken the festive season
To give me the perfect reason
To hold this sprig of mistletoe
And kiss you softly in the snow
CRIMBLE LOVING
I’ve waited all year to bestow
A kiss beneath the mistletoe
A kiss to leave you all agog
Not just a cheap drunken snog
A kiss to leave you all aglow
A passionate kiss to let you know
That I hold a flaming torch for you
I hope you feel the same way too
CHRISTMASTIDE LOVE
Now that it’s Christmas
There’s something I must do
Or there’s something I must say
My heart is so full of love for you
I must tell you how I feel
Say how much I love you
And how much you mean to me
Then hope that you love me too
And if you don’t then I will know
But I will still love you
THE GIFT I WANTED THE MOST
The gift I wanted the most
Was the sweetest girl
With a generous heart
A smile to banish darkness
And a warm and tender soul
To make all of my
Christmas dreams come true
I thought it wasn’t to be
But then I found you
LONELY CHRISTMAS
The room is full
Of good friends
And loving family
But I’m still lonely
There is laughter
Happiness and jollity
Kindness in abundance
But I’m still sad
There is warmth
In the familiar smiles
And in the tender hugs
But I’m still cold
I continue to be lonely
I continue to be sad
I continue to be cold
Because you’re not here
GLASS DECORATIONS ON THE TREE
Glass Decorations on the tree
Candy canes of red and white
Tinsel sparkles delightfully
And reflects the coloured light
A garland graces the mantel
With boughs of fresh cut holly
Mistletoe is hopefully hung
To steal a kiss from Molly
OUTSIDE IT’S SNOWING HARD
Outside it’s snowing hard
Falling fast and lying deep
But you are warm and safe
As in your bed you sleep
But I must brave the elements
As the wind stings my face
So I can spend Christmas
In your sweet loving embrace
WINTER WARMER
The Snow lies on the Earth
Icicles hang from the gate
Frost sits on the window panes
A fire burns in the grate
The sun sets beyond the wood
Abandoning the sky
Let’s draw the curtains in
And bank the fire high
Now turn the lamplight up
And forget about the weather
Warm moment we’ll share
As we cosy up together
I love the festive season
When it’s cold and freezing
Then my favourite thing to do
Is to cuddle up close to you
DARLING I LOVE YOU
Each and every day
I say these words to you
Darling I love you
Then every Christmas
I say these words to you
Merry Christmas Darling I love you
And every New Year
I say these words to you
Happy New Year Darling I love you
And every time I say it
You look at me and say
Whatever
THIS WISH, I WISH
This wish I wish,
Is a wish for you,
The wish is for me
The wish is for you
The wish, I wish
Is a wish for you,
Don’t you see?
The wish is for you
That’s what I wish
I wish only for you
CRIMBLE LOVE
It has taken the festive season
To give me the perfect reason
To hold this sprig of mistletoe
And kiss you softly in the snow
CRIMBLE LOVING
I’ve waited all year to bestow
A kiss beneath the mistletoe
A kiss to leave you all agog
Not just a cheap drunken snog
A kiss to leave you all aglow
A passionate kiss to let you know
That I hold a flaming torch for you
I hope you feel the same way too
CHRISTMASTIDE LOVE
Now that it’s Christmas
There’s something I must do
Or there’s something I must say
My heart is so full of love for you
I must tell you how I feel
Say how much I love you
And how much you mean to me
Then hope that you love me too
And if you don’t then I will know
But I will still love you
THE GIFT I WANTED THE MOST
The gift I wanted the most
Was the sweetest girl
With a generous heart
A smile to banish darkness
And a warm and tender soul
To make all of my
Christmas dreams come true
I thought it wasn’t to be
But then I found you
LONELY CHRISTMAS
The room is full
Of good friends
And loving family
But I’m still lonely
There is laughter
Happiness and jollity
Kindness in abundance
But I’m still sad
There is warmth
In the familiar smiles
And in the tender hugs
But I’m still cold
I continue to be lonely
I continue to be sad
I continue to be cold
Because you’re not here
GLASS DECORATIONS ON THE TREE
Glass Decorations on the tree
Candy canes of red and white
Tinsel sparkles delightfully
And reflects the coloured light
A garland graces the mantel
With boughs of fresh cut holly
Mistletoe is hopefully hung
To steal a kiss from Molly
OUTSIDE IT’S SNOWING HARD
Outside it’s snowing hard
Falling fast and lying deep
But you are warm and safe
As in your bed you sleep
But I must brave the elements
As the wind stings my face
So I can spend Christmas
In your sweet loving embrace
WINTER WARMER
The Snow lies on the Earth
Icicles hang from the gate
Frost sits on the window panes
A fire burns in the grate
The sun sets beyond the wood
Abandoning the sky
Let’s draw the curtains in
And bank the fire high
Now turn the lamplight up
And forget about the weather
Warm moment we’ll share
As we cosy up together
A CHRISTMAS SELECTION # 2
CHRISTMAS BERRY
The Christmas berry
Evergreen and spiny
With flowers of every hue
From white to blue
With abundant berries
Bright red as cherries
TO ALL OF YOU, FROM ALL OF US
I have to say
Without ado
Its time to say
To all of you
From all of us
Merry Christmas
THE WEATHER MAY BE DREARY
The weather may be dreary
My bones maybe weary
I may walk with heavy step
I maybe lacking in pep
But when Christmas arrives
My spirit soon revives
IT LIFTS THE HEART AND SOUL
It lifts the heart and soul
Even when doing chores
What the year long drains
The festive season restores
IT’S NOT EVERYONE’S IDEAL
It’s not everyone’s ideal
Not their cup of tea
Or glass of mulled wine
But it is for me
Christmas is special
A wonderful heartfelt time
When deep felt feelings
Of happiness and joy
Rise to the surface
Like bubbles in champagne
SEASONS COME AND GO
Seasons come and go, but
For me the festive season
Is the most special of all
It refreshes and restores
Simply put, it invigorates
And sets me up once again
For the coming year ahead
LET’S RAISE A GLASS TO MUM # 1
Let’s raise a glass to Mum
And I speak for us all when I say
You have triumphed once again
In your quiet efficient way
You have managed to conjure up
Another perfect Christmas day
LET’S RAISE A GLASS TO MUM # 2
Let’s raise a glass to Mum
For yet another job well done
And the essence of my reasoning
Is, you are the festive seasoning
For by chasing the blandness away
It’s you who flavours the day
NOW THAT IT'S CHRISTMAS # 1
Now that it's Christmas
It makes me kind of sad
To do all the things
I used to do with Dad
But when I feel him beside me
Then I don’t feel so bad
CHRISTMAS FLOWER
The Christmas flower
Festively untypical
Having poisonous milk
And being tropical
But scarlet petal-like leaves
Make them appear more topical
The Christmas berry
Evergreen and spiny
With flowers of every hue
From white to blue
With abundant berries
Bright red as cherries
TO ALL OF YOU, FROM ALL OF US
I have to say
Without ado
Its time to say
To all of you
From all of us
Merry Christmas
THE WEATHER MAY BE DREARY
The weather may be dreary
My bones maybe weary
I may walk with heavy step
I maybe lacking in pep
But when Christmas arrives
My spirit soon revives
IT LIFTS THE HEART AND SOUL
It lifts the heart and soul
Even when doing chores
What the year long drains
The festive season restores
IT’S NOT EVERYONE’S IDEAL
It’s not everyone’s ideal
Not their cup of tea
Or glass of mulled wine
But it is for me
Christmas is special
A wonderful heartfelt time
When deep felt feelings
Of happiness and joy
Rise to the surface
Like bubbles in champagne
SEASONS COME AND GO
Seasons come and go, but
For me the festive season
Is the most special of all
It refreshes and restores
Simply put, it invigorates
And sets me up once again
For the coming year ahead
LET’S RAISE A GLASS TO MUM # 1
Let’s raise a glass to Mum
And I speak for us all when I say
You have triumphed once again
In your quiet efficient way
You have managed to conjure up
Another perfect Christmas day
LET’S RAISE A GLASS TO MUM # 2
Let’s raise a glass to Mum
For yet another job well done
And the essence of my reasoning
Is, you are the festive seasoning
For by chasing the blandness away
It’s you who flavours the day
NOW THAT IT'S CHRISTMAS # 1
Now that it's Christmas
It makes me kind of sad
To do all the things
I used to do with Dad
But when I feel him beside me
Then I don’t feel so bad
CHRISTMAS FLOWER
The Christmas flower
Festively untypical
Having poisonous milk
And being tropical
But scarlet petal-like leaves
Make them appear more topical
ARE YOU WEARING FOR CHRISTMAS # 2
ARE YOU WEARING A GREEN CHRISTMAS OUTFIT?
Are you wearing a green Christmas outfit?
You look very beautiful in it
In fact you look very cute
In your Santa’s little helper suit
A Christmas hat sits atop your curls
In a way only suited to girls
A beautiful green velvet dress
And white fur trim to impress
Striped woollen legs of green and white
Are they stocking or tights?
Stockings would be in reason
More in keeping with the season
But I would not disparage woolly tights
They too have their own delights
Come and help me trim the tree
And say you dressed this way for me?
ARE YOU WEARING CHRISTMAS TIGHTS?
Are you wearing Christmas tights?
Adorned with a festive motif
Well if those long festive limbs
Decorated with Christmas motif
Were to entwine about me
Then my resistant would be brief
ARE YOU WEARING AN ELF OUTFIT?
Are you wearing an elf outfit?
Does it come with all the kit?
Pixie boots and a floppy hat
The green tights and all that
If you come to the grotto with me
You can call me Santa and sit on my knee
ARE YOU WEARING A BUNCH OF MISTLETOE?
Are you wearing a bunch of mistletoe?
Well you certainly mean business
Isn’t that overkill? “Less is more” after all
But you know what your doing I guess
Are you aiming at a particular beau?
Do you have a target in mind?
Or are you more indiscriminate
Scattergun like or something of the kind
Oh so there is an object of your affections
Is it perhaps someone that I know?
It’s someone I know very well indeed?
I still don’t know the identity of your beau
It’s me? I’m the one you desire?
You want to kiss me beneath the mistletoe?
ARE YOU SANTA’S LITTLE HELPER?
Are you Santa’s little helper?
Well you’re a proper little belter
I love the little pixie boots
And the red velvet dress really suits
The Santa hat looks very smart
The stripy stockings stir the heart
And I’d like to see your garters
But give me a kiss for starters
ARE YOU WEARING A SANTA HAT?
Are you wearing a Santa hat?
A festive little “tit for tat”
Well it really does suit
In fact you look very cute
Are you wearing it for fun?
Or do you have it set at anyone?
I think it looks very twee
I wish you were wearing it for me
ARE YOU WEARING CHRISTMAS KNICKERS?
Are you wearing Christmas Knickers?
Is that appropriate for vicars?
Just kneel upon this hassock
While I rummage in your cassock
The bishop wouldn’t think it funny
My naughty little Christmas honey
ARE YOU WEARING PLAITS?
Are you wearing plaits?
Seriously though are you
You’re going to wear plaits
To the annual Christmas do
And dressed as a milk maid
Perhaps Scandinavian born
You look like you’re dressed
For 1970s porn
Are you wearing a green Christmas outfit?
You look very beautiful in it
In fact you look very cute
In your Santa’s little helper suit
A Christmas hat sits atop your curls
In a way only suited to girls
A beautiful green velvet dress
And white fur trim to impress
Striped woollen legs of green and white
Are they stocking or tights?
Stockings would be in reason
More in keeping with the season
But I would not disparage woolly tights
They too have their own delights
Come and help me trim the tree
And say you dressed this way for me?
ARE YOU WEARING CHRISTMAS TIGHTS?
Are you wearing Christmas tights?
Adorned with a festive motif
Well if those long festive limbs
Decorated with Christmas motif
Were to entwine about me
Then my resistant would be brief
ARE YOU WEARING AN ELF OUTFIT?
Are you wearing an elf outfit?
Does it come with all the kit?
Pixie boots and a floppy hat
The green tights and all that
If you come to the grotto with me
You can call me Santa and sit on my knee
ARE YOU WEARING A BUNCH OF MISTLETOE?
Are you wearing a bunch of mistletoe?
Well you certainly mean business
Isn’t that overkill? “Less is more” after all
But you know what your doing I guess
Are you aiming at a particular beau?
Do you have a target in mind?
Or are you more indiscriminate
Scattergun like or something of the kind
Oh so there is an object of your affections
Is it perhaps someone that I know?
It’s someone I know very well indeed?
I still don’t know the identity of your beau
It’s me? I’m the one you desire?
You want to kiss me beneath the mistletoe?
ARE YOU SANTA’S LITTLE HELPER?
Are you Santa’s little helper?
Well you’re a proper little belter
I love the little pixie boots
And the red velvet dress really suits
The Santa hat looks very smart
The stripy stockings stir the heart
And I’d like to see your garters
But give me a kiss for starters
ARE YOU WEARING A SANTA HAT?
Are you wearing a Santa hat?
A festive little “tit for tat”
Well it really does suit
In fact you look very cute
Are you wearing it for fun?
Or do you have it set at anyone?
I think it looks very twee
I wish you were wearing it for me
ARE YOU WEARING CHRISTMAS KNICKERS?
Are you wearing Christmas Knickers?
Is that appropriate for vicars?
Just kneel upon this hassock
While I rummage in your cassock
The bishop wouldn’t think it funny
My naughty little Christmas honey
ARE YOU WEARING PLAITS?
Are you wearing plaits?
Seriously though are you
You’re going to wear plaits
To the annual Christmas do
And dressed as a milk maid
Perhaps Scandinavian born
You look like you’re dressed
For 1970s porn
Christmas Humour # 2
CHAVS CHRISTMAS # 1
I kept the kids home from school
For the big Christmas shop
Because during school time
You rush round without a stop
FOR STRESS FREE SHOPPING
For stress free shopping
Follow this golden rule
And get all of it done
While the kids are at school
IS SANTA CLAUS REALLY A WOMAN # 1
Is Santa Claus really a woman?
Oh do me a favour please
It’s obviously a man
Why is it so hard to believe?
That’s why everything happens
Late on Christmas Eve
THE LAST REINDEER
A reindeer walked into a pub,
And ordered a pint of beer.
The barman pulled a pint
And gave it to the reindeer,
The reindeer took the drink
And handed over a ten
He checked his change
Then he checked it again
The barman then said
"You’re the first reindeer
I think I’m right in saying
That we've had in here."
He delivered to the barman
A look, barely disguised
“To be honest at these prices
I'm really not surprised”
FAIRY TALE STATISTIC
Here’s a Statistic
That’s really crappy
6 out of 7 dwarves
Really aren’t Happy
CHRISTMAS TRIMMINGS
Christmas planning is essential
Or else the festive ambience suffers
And you will not easily be forgiven
If you forget the stocking stuffer’s
IS SANTA CLAUS REALLY A WOMAN # 2
Is Santa Claus really a woman?
Why has this not come up before?
If it were left to a man everything
Would come from the corner store
AFTER THREE WEEKS OR SO
After three weeks or so
Working in the grotto
It begins to take its toll
On the poor old soul
Sitting on his great chair
Pretending to care
As all the girls and boys
Plead for various toys
Kids of every shape and size
Looking for a prize
Clambering on his knee
Wriggling with glee
Until the poor old chap
Suffers from Santa lap
THE OFFICE PARTY
The office party
Was relief from the slog
When you spent your time
Hitting the nog
And hanging by the mistletoe
Hoping for a snog
SNOWMAN
What a lovely snowman
Big and round and tall
There isn’t anything I like better
Really nothing at all
It’s the first thing I look for
As soon as the snow falls
It’s definitely a snowman
See it has “Snow balls”
I WISH YOU GOOD LUCK
I wish you Good luck
I wish you Good cheer
I wish you Good health
For the coming year
I wish you Good times,
I wish you great days
But I will never ever
Wish you Happy holidays
I kept the kids home from school
For the big Christmas shop
Because during school time
You rush round without a stop
FOR STRESS FREE SHOPPING
For stress free shopping
Follow this golden rule
And get all of it done
While the kids are at school
IS SANTA CLAUS REALLY A WOMAN # 1
Is Santa Claus really a woman?
Oh do me a favour please
It’s obviously a man
Why is it so hard to believe?
That’s why everything happens
Late on Christmas Eve
THE LAST REINDEER
A reindeer walked into a pub,
And ordered a pint of beer.
The barman pulled a pint
And gave it to the reindeer,
The reindeer took the drink
And handed over a ten
He checked his change
Then he checked it again
The barman then said
"You’re the first reindeer
I think I’m right in saying
That we've had in here."
He delivered to the barman
A look, barely disguised
“To be honest at these prices
I'm really not surprised”
FAIRY TALE STATISTIC
Here’s a Statistic
That’s really crappy
6 out of 7 dwarves
Really aren’t Happy
CHRISTMAS TRIMMINGS
Christmas planning is essential
Or else the festive ambience suffers
And you will not easily be forgiven
If you forget the stocking stuffer’s
IS SANTA CLAUS REALLY A WOMAN # 2
Is Santa Claus really a woman?
Why has this not come up before?
If it were left to a man everything
Would come from the corner store
AFTER THREE WEEKS OR SO
After three weeks or so
Working in the grotto
It begins to take its toll
On the poor old soul
Sitting on his great chair
Pretending to care
As all the girls and boys
Plead for various toys
Kids of every shape and size
Looking for a prize
Clambering on his knee
Wriggling with glee
Until the poor old chap
Suffers from Santa lap
THE OFFICE PARTY
The office party
Was relief from the slog
When you spent your time
Hitting the nog
And hanging by the mistletoe
Hoping for a snog
SNOWMAN
What a lovely snowman
Big and round and tall
There isn’t anything I like better
Really nothing at all
It’s the first thing I look for
As soon as the snow falls
It’s definitely a snowman
See it has “Snow balls”
I WISH YOU GOOD LUCK
I wish you Good luck
I wish you Good cheer
I wish you Good health
For the coming year
I wish you Good times,
I wish you great days
But I will never ever
Wish you Happy holidays
Wednesday, 21 November 2012
CHRISTMAS LOVE SELECTION # 1
I DON’T NEED THE FINEST GIFT
I don’t need the finest gift
I don’t need a Christmas wish
Because I’m already blessed
With a special Christmas dish
MY GIFT IS A SPECIAL LOVE
My gift is a special love
That lasts the whole year through
So if I had a Christmas wish
I would still wish for you
A SPRIG OF MISTLETOE
There hangs a sprig of Mistletoe
The first of the season I’ve seen
Its berries glowing like pearls
Amongst the tiny leaves of green
And below stands sweet Emily
Where hangs the Mistletoe above
Tied with red ribbon to the beam
And I claim a kiss from the girl I love
MY COMFORT AND SUCCOUR
Have a lovely Christmas
My companion and confident
My friend of friends,
My comfort and succour
Have a lovely Christmas
Soother of my soul
You are everything to me
Except my lover
Have a lovely Christmas
Occupant of my heart
My comfort and succour
My secret love
A WASTED WISH
Why would I make a Christmas Wish?
And hope that it would come true,
What on earth could I ever wish for?
That would be a tenth as good as you
ELF PRINCESS
I will be your elf princess
And I will be forever yours
So put on the red suit
And be my Santa Claus
WHAT WOULD I WISH FOR?
If I had a Christmas wish
What would I wish for?
Well that’s a good question
I’m not really sure
I'd wish for peace in the world
Yes I think that would do
No I’m only kidding
I would wish for you
FLAWLESS
You are fat and round
And your trousers are tight
Your nose is quite red
And your beard is white
Now all of the above
Might be considered flaws
But they’re not to me
As you are my Santa Claus
THE WARM GLOW
In the warm glow
Of the log fire blazing
The fresh trimmed tree
Just looks amazing
As we sit together
In the quiet glow
I yearn to say
How much I love you so
The depth of my love
Is truly amazing
And just one coy glance
Sets my passions blazing
So on Christmas Eve
In the quiet glow
I think its time
For you to know
Just how much
I love you so
CHRISTMAS IS A SPECIAL TIME
Christmas is a special time
When wishes can come true
But if you find they don’t
You can still make believe
That she is in love with you
CHRISTMAS STAR
I wouldn’t need to look too far
To find the perfect Christmas star
I’d open my eyes and there you are
I don’t have to wish upon a star
To find the perfect Christmas star
Because you're the very best by far
THE BEST PRESENT YOU CAN EVER RECEIVE
The best present you can ever receive
Does not possess any monetary value
Yet is more precious than pure gold
It’s the gift of someone loving you
I don’t need the finest gift
I don’t need a Christmas wish
Because I’m already blessed
With a special Christmas dish
MY GIFT IS A SPECIAL LOVE
My gift is a special love
That lasts the whole year through
So if I had a Christmas wish
I would still wish for you
A SPRIG OF MISTLETOE
There hangs a sprig of Mistletoe
The first of the season I’ve seen
Its berries glowing like pearls
Amongst the tiny leaves of green
And below stands sweet Emily
Where hangs the Mistletoe above
Tied with red ribbon to the beam
And I claim a kiss from the girl I love
MY COMFORT AND SUCCOUR
Have a lovely Christmas
My companion and confident
My friend of friends,
My comfort and succour
Have a lovely Christmas
Soother of my soul
You are everything to me
Except my lover
Have a lovely Christmas
Occupant of my heart
My comfort and succour
My secret love
A WASTED WISH
Why would I make a Christmas Wish?
And hope that it would come true,
What on earth could I ever wish for?
That would be a tenth as good as you
ELF PRINCESS
I will be your elf princess
And I will be forever yours
So put on the red suit
And be my Santa Claus
WHAT WOULD I WISH FOR?
If I had a Christmas wish
What would I wish for?
Well that’s a good question
I’m not really sure
I'd wish for peace in the world
Yes I think that would do
No I’m only kidding
I would wish for you
FLAWLESS
You are fat and round
And your trousers are tight
Your nose is quite red
And your beard is white
Now all of the above
Might be considered flaws
But they’re not to me
As you are my Santa Claus
THE WARM GLOW
In the warm glow
Of the log fire blazing
The fresh trimmed tree
Just looks amazing
As we sit together
In the quiet glow
I yearn to say
How much I love you so
The depth of my love
Is truly amazing
And just one coy glance
Sets my passions blazing
So on Christmas Eve
In the quiet glow
I think its time
For you to know
Just how much
I love you so
CHRISTMAS IS A SPECIAL TIME
Christmas is a special time
When wishes can come true
But if you find they don’t
You can still make believe
That she is in love with you
CHRISTMAS STAR
I wouldn’t need to look too far
To find the perfect Christmas star
I’d open my eyes and there you are
I don’t have to wish upon a star
To find the perfect Christmas star
Because you're the very best by far
THE BEST PRESENT YOU CAN EVER RECEIVE
The best present you can ever receive
Does not possess any monetary value
Yet is more precious than pure gold
It’s the gift of someone loving you
A CHRISTMAS SELECTION # 1
IT ISN’T SUPPED WITH ENDLESS BEERS
The magic of Christmas
Isn’t supped with endless beers
Nor is it to be expressed
Within vociferous cheers
The magic of Christmas
As through all the years
Is to be found in the company
Of your nears and dears
IF I GREW A BEARD OF WHITE
If I grew a beard of white
On the off chance that I might
Have a chance to advance my cause
By appearing to you as Santa Claus
And you would have you tell to me
As you sat upon my knee
What it is that you most desire
And to what hopes you most aspire
And if those secrets you told to me
You might find them beneath your tree
CHRISTMAS CACTUS
The Christmas cactus
The winter-bloomer
Its jointed flat segments
Look like experiments
Made by a young boy
With a construction set toy
But the rose-purple flowers
Light up the winter hours
LITTLE BOXES
Little parcels by the fireside
Little parcels wrapped in pretty paper
Little parcels by the fireside
Little labels all the same
There's a round one and a square one
And a long one and a squishy one,
And they're all wrapped in pretty paper
Little labels all the same
And the people in their houses
All sit beside the Christmas tree
And one un-wraps a pretty parcel
Then the others do the same
So the round one and the square one
And the long one and the squishy one,
That were all wrapped in pretty paper
Christmas presents is the name
A QUIET MAGIC DESCENDS
Oh how a quiet magic descends
Upon the streets on Christmas day
As it’s the one day of the year
The shops are closed all day
CHRISTMAS DAY FOR THE POOR
Christmas day for the poor,
Hold very little surprise
For them it’s just another day
In a sparkling disguise
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 250
Little Robin Redbreast sat upon a tree,
he makes a pretty picture doesn’t he?
Little Robin Redbreast in the winter hard
He makes a pretty picture on a Christmas card
CHRISTMAS IS OUR FAVOURITE CELEBRATION
Christmas is our favourite celebration
In fact it is the most special occasion
A time to express what is in our hearts
The moment the festive season starts
For we have the most heartfelt wish
For those whose love we truly cherish.
CHRISTMAS BEGONIA
The Christmas Begonia
The winter-bloomer
Whose large pink flowers
Light up the winter hours
CRIMBLETIDE
I really love Crimbletide
It makes me all warm inside
And the joy I cannot hide
For the season of Crimbletide
The magic of Christmas
Isn’t supped with endless beers
Nor is it to be expressed
Within vociferous cheers
The magic of Christmas
As through all the years
Is to be found in the company
Of your nears and dears
IF I GREW A BEARD OF WHITE
If I grew a beard of white
On the off chance that I might
Have a chance to advance my cause
By appearing to you as Santa Claus
And you would have you tell to me
As you sat upon my knee
What it is that you most desire
And to what hopes you most aspire
And if those secrets you told to me
You might find them beneath your tree
CHRISTMAS CACTUS
The Christmas cactus
The winter-bloomer
Its jointed flat segments
Look like experiments
Made by a young boy
With a construction set toy
But the rose-purple flowers
Light up the winter hours
LITTLE BOXES
Little parcels by the fireside
Little parcels wrapped in pretty paper
Little parcels by the fireside
Little labels all the same
There's a round one and a square one
And a long one and a squishy one,
And they're all wrapped in pretty paper
Little labels all the same
And the people in their houses
All sit beside the Christmas tree
And one un-wraps a pretty parcel
Then the others do the same
So the round one and the square one
And the long one and the squishy one,
That were all wrapped in pretty paper
Christmas presents is the name
A QUIET MAGIC DESCENDS
Oh how a quiet magic descends
Upon the streets on Christmas day
As it’s the one day of the year
The shops are closed all day
CHRISTMAS DAY FOR THE POOR
Christmas day for the poor,
Hold very little surprise
For them it’s just another day
In a sparkling disguise
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 250
Little Robin Redbreast sat upon a tree,
he makes a pretty picture doesn’t he?
Little Robin Redbreast in the winter hard
He makes a pretty picture on a Christmas card
CHRISTMAS IS OUR FAVOURITE CELEBRATION
Christmas is our favourite celebration
In fact it is the most special occasion
A time to express what is in our hearts
The moment the festive season starts
For we have the most heartfelt wish
For those whose love we truly cherish.
CHRISTMAS BEGONIA
The Christmas Begonia
The winter-bloomer
Whose large pink flowers
Light up the winter hours
CRIMBLETIDE
I really love Crimbletide
It makes me all warm inside
And the joy I cannot hide
For the season of Crimbletide
ARE YOU WEARING FOR CHRISTMAS # 1
ARE YOU WEARING A RED CHRISTMAS OUTFIT?
Are you wearing a red Christmas outfit?
You look very beautiful in it
In fact you look very cute
In your Santa’s little helper suit
A Christmas hat sits atop your curls
In a way only suited to girls
A beautiful red velvet dress
And white fur trim to impress
Striped woollen legs of red and white
Are they stocking or tights?
Stockings would be in reason
More in keeping with the season
But I would not disparage woolly tights
They too have their own delights
Come and help me trim the tree
And say you dressed this way for me?
ARE YOU WEARING XMAS STOCKINGS?
Are you wearing Xmas stockings?
With a holly wreath motif
Along those long festive garlands
How I wish to trace each leaf
Along each luscious limber leg
An ascent exquisitely brief
To reach the Christmas gift
Beyond the holly wreath motif
ARE YOU WEARING ELFISH EARS?
Are you wearing elfish ears?
It’s a very interesting feature
Though more appropriate
On a woodland creature
And not really suitable
For one in your position
You are let me remind you
The leader of the opposition
ARE YOU WEARING IT FOR A REASON?
Are you wearing it for a reason?
That outfit for the Christmas season
Yes it does come around very soon
But you do realise that it’s only June
ARE YOU WEARING A SANTA SUIT?
Are you wearing a Santa Suit?
I have to say you do look cute
I wonder if there might just be
A little room in there for me
ARE YOU WEARING A SPRIG OF MISTLETOE?
Are you wearing a sprig of mistletoe?
Are you hoping to meet a beau?
And kiss him passionately in the snow
An embrace to leave you all aglow
Is that why you wear the mistletoe?
ARE YOU WEARING CHRISTMAS HOSIERY?
Are you wearing Christmas hosiery?
Phwor are you going to let me see
Oh how they cling to the shape of you
I would like to cling to them too
Oh yes I like them very much
Perhaps I might have a touch
Oh you are a proper tease
Would you let me if I said please?
ARE YOU WEARING TINSEL?
Are you wearing tinsel?
Draped about your figure
Like a festive feather boa
Just covering your treasure
How seductive you appear
A little package of pleasure
You dance and prance
So full of vim and vigour
Now let me pull the tinsel
Then you can pull my trigger
ARE YOU WEARING ANY CLOTHES?
Are you wearing any clothes?
My little Christmas elf
You’re supposed to dress the tree!
Not undress yourself
Are you wearing a red Christmas outfit?
You look very beautiful in it
In fact you look very cute
In your Santa’s little helper suit
A Christmas hat sits atop your curls
In a way only suited to girls
A beautiful red velvet dress
And white fur trim to impress
Striped woollen legs of red and white
Are they stocking or tights?
Stockings would be in reason
More in keeping with the season
But I would not disparage woolly tights
They too have their own delights
Come and help me trim the tree
And say you dressed this way for me?
ARE YOU WEARING XMAS STOCKINGS?
Are you wearing Xmas stockings?
With a holly wreath motif
Along those long festive garlands
How I wish to trace each leaf
Along each luscious limber leg
An ascent exquisitely brief
To reach the Christmas gift
Beyond the holly wreath motif
ARE YOU WEARING ELFISH EARS?
Are you wearing elfish ears?
It’s a very interesting feature
Though more appropriate
On a woodland creature
And not really suitable
For one in your position
You are let me remind you
The leader of the opposition
ARE YOU WEARING IT FOR A REASON?
Are you wearing it for a reason?
That outfit for the Christmas season
Yes it does come around very soon
But you do realise that it’s only June
ARE YOU WEARING A SANTA SUIT?
Are you wearing a Santa Suit?
I have to say you do look cute
I wonder if there might just be
A little room in there for me
ARE YOU WEARING A SPRIG OF MISTLETOE?
Are you wearing a sprig of mistletoe?
Are you hoping to meet a beau?
And kiss him passionately in the snow
An embrace to leave you all aglow
Is that why you wear the mistletoe?
ARE YOU WEARING CHRISTMAS HOSIERY?
Are you wearing Christmas hosiery?
Phwor are you going to let me see
Oh how they cling to the shape of you
I would like to cling to them too
Oh yes I like them very much
Perhaps I might have a touch
Oh you are a proper tease
Would you let me if I said please?
ARE YOU WEARING TINSEL?
Are you wearing tinsel?
Draped about your figure
Like a festive feather boa
Just covering your treasure
How seductive you appear
A little package of pleasure
You dance and prance
So full of vim and vigour
Now let me pull the tinsel
Then you can pull my trigger
ARE YOU WEARING ANY CLOTHES?
Are you wearing any clothes?
My little Christmas elf
You’re supposed to dress the tree!
Not undress yourself
Christmas Humour # 1
YOU ARE A NAUGHTY LITTLE ELF
You are a naughty little Elf
Do you behave yourself?
By the look upon your face
You’re no stranger to disgrace
So it is my Christmas wish
To share a Christmas kiss
So climb upon me knee
And you will quickly see
I have that special touch
That you’ll like very much
When I curl your toes
Inside your ho ho hose
CHRISTMAS MANIA
Uncle John has mental health issues
And he doesn’t do well with stress
So normally come Christmas time
He has to board the bi-polar express
THE BIG FELLA’S R & R
After circumnavigating the globe
Staring at the back end of Prancer
Santa Claus really looks forward
To watching a north pole dancer
HANDLE MUM WITH CARE
Mum gets really stressed out at Christmas
And you upset her if you dare
Because the result could be that you will
Be hung from the chimney with care
SANTA CLAUS IS IN TROUBLE
Santa Claus is in trouble
He’s been up to his old tricks again
When the Christmas fairy was found
Licking his candy cane
SANTA’S HELPER
Santa has helpers at Christmas
To get him through the season
Then he rests pretty much until Easter
He claims fatigue is the reason
And he is unable to fulfil his duties
Satisfying his cute little yelper
So he bought Mrs Claus a new toy
To make his neglected wife purr
It came with plenty of batteries
Its known as Santa Big helper
THE BIG FELLA’S R & R AGAIN
After circumnavigating the globe
The reins of his sleigh in his hand
The only thought on his mind
Is his wife’s winter wonderland
WANTED: SANTA’S LITTLE HELPER
It wasn’t efficiency
Santa wanted from his helper
He preferred them to be
A barker and a yelper
But then the vacancy was for
Santa’s slutty little helper
RUDOLF’S LOW SELF ESTEEM
Rudolf suffered
From low self esteem
Due to the red nose
It would seem
It rendered him useless
As a parcel carrier
So Santa made a call
To a reindeer whisperer
WE WENT TO A FAIRY TALE PARTY
We went to a fairy tale party
Which I thought was crappy
I ended up feeling grumpy
While my wife was felling happy
You are a naughty little Elf
Do you behave yourself?
By the look upon your face
You’re no stranger to disgrace
So it is my Christmas wish
To share a Christmas kiss
So climb upon me knee
And you will quickly see
I have that special touch
That you’ll like very much
When I curl your toes
Inside your ho ho hose
CHRISTMAS MANIA
Uncle John has mental health issues
And he doesn’t do well with stress
So normally come Christmas time
He has to board the bi-polar express
THE BIG FELLA’S R & R
After circumnavigating the globe
Staring at the back end of Prancer
Santa Claus really looks forward
To watching a north pole dancer
HANDLE MUM WITH CARE
Mum gets really stressed out at Christmas
And you upset her if you dare
Because the result could be that you will
Be hung from the chimney with care
SANTA CLAUS IS IN TROUBLE
Santa Claus is in trouble
He’s been up to his old tricks again
When the Christmas fairy was found
Licking his candy cane
SANTA’S HELPER
Santa has helpers at Christmas
To get him through the season
Then he rests pretty much until Easter
He claims fatigue is the reason
And he is unable to fulfil his duties
Satisfying his cute little yelper
So he bought Mrs Claus a new toy
To make his neglected wife purr
It came with plenty of batteries
Its known as Santa Big helper
THE BIG FELLA’S R & R AGAIN
After circumnavigating the globe
The reins of his sleigh in his hand
The only thought on his mind
Is his wife’s winter wonderland
WANTED: SANTA’S LITTLE HELPER
It wasn’t efficiency
Santa wanted from his helper
He preferred them to be
A barker and a yelper
But then the vacancy was for
Santa’s slutty little helper
RUDOLF’S LOW SELF ESTEEM
Rudolf suffered
From low self esteem
Due to the red nose
It would seem
It rendered him useless
As a parcel carrier
So Santa made a call
To a reindeer whisperer
WE WENT TO A FAIRY TALE PARTY
We went to a fairy tale party
Which I thought was crappy
I ended up feeling grumpy
While my wife was felling happy
HALLOWEEN
HALLOWEEN HORRORS
Halloween horrors
Cross the thin veil
You must escape them
You’ll die if you fail
A HALLOWEEN HORROR
A Halloween horror
Threatens my faith
A demon of my own making
The haunting of a wraith
HORRORS OF HELL
Horrors of hell
Those cast down
Rise on Halloween
To walk about town
Bloody demons
In bloody gown
Horrors of hell
Will cut you down
SHE COULD BEGUILE AND MESMERISE
She could beguile
And mesmerise
She could entrance
And hypnotize
She was a cunning
Thorny little bitch
She was also a stunning
Horny little Witch
Halloween horrors
Cross the thin veil
You must escape them
You’ll die if you fail
A HALLOWEEN HORROR
A Halloween horror
Threatens my faith
A demon of my own making
The haunting of a wraith
HORRORS OF HELL
Horrors of hell
Those cast down
Rise on Halloween
To walk about town
Bloody demons
In bloody gown
Horrors of hell
Will cut you down
SHE COULD BEGUILE AND MESMERISE
She could beguile
And mesmerise
She could entrance
And hypnotize
She was a cunning
Thorny little bitch
She was also a stunning
Horny little Witch
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