ARE YOU WEARING FOR CHRISTMAS # 2

ARE YOU WEARING A GREEN CHRISTMAS OUTFIT?

Are you wearing a green Christmas outfit?
You look very beautiful in it
In fact you look very cute
In your Santa’s little helper suit
A Christmas hat sits atop your curls
In a way only suited to girls
A beautiful green velvet dress
And white fur trim to impress
Striped woollen legs of green and white
Are they stocking or tights?
Stockings would be in reason
More in keeping with the season
But I would not disparage woolly tights
They too have their own delights
Come and help me trim the tree
And say you dressed this way for me?

ARE YOU WEARING CHRISTMAS TIGHTS?

Are you wearing Christmas tights?
Adorned with a festive motif
Well if those long festive limbs
Decorated with Christmas motif
Were to entwine about me
Then my resistant would be brief

ARE YOU WEARING AN ELF OUTFIT?

Are you wearing an elf outfit?
Does it come with all the kit?
Pixie boots and a floppy hat
The green tights and all that
If you come to the grotto with me
You can call me Santa and sit on my knee

ARE YOU WEARING A BUNCH OF MISTLETOE?

Are you wearing a bunch of mistletoe?
Well you certainly mean business
Isn’t that overkill? “Less is more” after all
But you know what your doing I guess
Are you aiming at a particular beau?
Do you have a target in mind?
Or are you more indiscriminate
Scattergun like or something of the kind
Oh so there is an object of your affections
Is it perhaps someone that I know?
It’s someone I know very well indeed?
I still don’t know the identity of your beau
It’s me? I’m the one you desire?
You want to kiss me beneath the mistletoe?

ARE YOU SANTA’S LITTLE HELPER?

Are you Santa’s little helper?
Well you’re a proper little belter
I love the little pixie boots
And the red velvet dress really suits
The Santa hat looks very smart
The stripy stockings stir the heart
And I’d like to see your garters
But give me a kiss for starters

ARE YOU WEARING A SANTA HAT?

Are you wearing a Santa hat?
A festive little “tit for tat”
Well it really does suit
In fact you look very cute
Are you wearing it for fun?
Or do you have it set at anyone?
I think it looks very twee
I wish you were wearing it for me

ARE YOU WEARING CHRISTMAS KNICKERS?

Are you wearing Christmas Knickers?
Is that appropriate for vicars?
Just kneel upon this hassock
While I rummage in your cassock
The bishop wouldn’t think it funny
My naughty little Christmas honey

ARE YOU WEARING PLAITS?

Are you wearing plaits?
Seriously though are you
You’re going to wear plaits
To the annual Christmas do

And dressed as a milk maid
Perhaps Scandinavian born
You look like you’re dressed
For 1970s porn