I BROKE MY GLASSES THE OTHER DAY

 

I broke my glasses the other day

So, I knew what had to be done

But guess who I bumped into

While at the opticians? Everyone

RISKY BEHAVIOURS

 

She woke up on Sunday morning

And regretted her risky behaviours

Muttering as she looked at her partner

“I should have gone to Specsavers”

MY OPTICIAN HAS A GIFT FOR STATING THE OBVIOUS

 

My optician has a gift for stating the obvious

Either that or he’s not very bright

After the eye test he declared forthrightly

“Mr Hooper your left eye isn’t right”

THE EYE TEST WENT ON FOR AN AGE

 

The eye test went on for an age

In fact, it was something of an ordeal

“Your right eye isn’t right” he said

Well, I can tell you that was surreal

AN OPTIMISTIC OPTICIAN

 

I go to an optimistic optician

When I need my biannual checks

The only downside is that he

Always sells me rose tinted specs

POLISH EYE TEST

 

A Polish man went to the optician

He’d not had an eye test before

The optician pointed and said

“Can you read the card on the door?”

“Read it?” the Polish guy replied

“That’s the name of my brother-in-law”

DON’T MAKE A SPECTACLE OF YOURSELF

 

If you walk into everything

Because your eyesight is chronic

Then the next thing you should do

Is walk into the walk in clinic

SHOULD HAVE GONE TO SPECSAVERS

When I was on an Alaskan island

I was sure I had seen an optician

Just as plain as the nose on my face

But it turned out to be an optical Aleutian

OPTIMISTS SEE THE WORLD

 

Optimists see the world,

Each and every day anew

Through Rose tinted lenses

The tint of mine is blue

Which colour my world

With everything I view

AN OPTIMISTIC OPTICIAN

 

I go to an optimistic optician

When I need my biannual checks

The only downside is that he

Always sells me rose tinted specs