EVEN MORE 21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 23

One, two, three, four, five.Once I caught a fish alive,
But what we couldn’t see
The fish was full of Mercury

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 24

An apple a day
Keeps the doctor away
Isn’t really true
So the best thing to do
Is squirt some mace
Into their face

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 25

Goosey Goosey Gander where shall I wander,Up hills, down dales with a bullet in the chamberthere I spied you plump and fat in my crosshairs
Then on the dinner table as we where saying prayers

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 26

Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle,The cow jumped over the moon.We just couldn’t wait to have more fun
As we heated some more in a spoon

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 27
Itsy Bitsy spider climbing up the spout
Where all the chemical waste comes out
Now Itsy Bitsy spider isn’t quite the same
And can no longer get in the spout again

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 28

Doctor FosterWent to Gloucester
On a railway train
But he got in a muddle
And got off at Bristol
And said “Oh shit not again”

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 29

Little Boy Blue
Come blow your horn,And I’ll make you a superstar
In the world of porn

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 30

Hickory dickory dock
Something’s up with the clockThe clock’s struck dumbThe batteries run downUseless bloody clock

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 31

London Bridge is falling down,Falling down, falling down,And the reason that its falling down
Built by Wimpy

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 32

Mondays child is bleary eyed,Tuesdays child is full of pride,Wednesdays child is fighting fit,Thursdays child is full of shit,Fridays child gets out of its brain,Saturdays child goes to the pub again
And the child that is born on the Sabbath day
Is nice and kind in an irritating way

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 33

Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffetEating her curds and whey,Along came a geezer,
Who propositioned herAnd horny Miss Muffet said ok

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 34

Old Mother HubbardWent to the cupboard
To get her and doggie some breadWhen she got thereThe cupboard was bareSo she ate the doggie instead.

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 35

Two little dicky birds sitting on a wall,One named Peter, one named Paul.Fly away Peter, away said Paul,Don’t come back, this is my wall!

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 36

Jack Sprat could eat no fatHis wife could eat no lean
And so to please the two of them
They eat vegetarian cuisine

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 37

As I was going to St. Ives
I met a man with seven wives,
Seven wives now that’s really tough
I’ve got one and that’s enough