IS THERE ANYTHING WORN UNDER THE KILT?

 

Is there anything worn under the kilt?

An old lady asked Mr Lauder?

“No Madam there is not” he replied

“Everything is in perfect working order”

CELEBRATING BLACK FRIDAY

 

I can say that this year I will be

Celebrating Black Friday

By completely ignoring it

Which is in my traditional way

THERE IS ONLY ONE THING THAT FLIES FASTER

 

There is only one thing that flies faster

Than stock off the shelves on Black Friday

And that is the endless flash of white

Of till receipt as the customers pay

I THINK BLACK FRIDAY

 

I think Black Friday

Is an appropriate name

It’s not a happy event

It’s like the Hunger Games

THE DAY AFTER THANKSGIVING

 

The day after Thanksgiving

Is known as "Black Friday"

Because it matches the mood

Of unhappy shoppers that day

WHAT DO THE WELL FED SHOPPERS EAT

What do the well fed shoppers eat

Among the throng on Black Friday?

Obviously they gorge themselves

On leftovers from Thanksgiving Day 

BLACK FRIDAY WEEK

 

I miss the good old days

When Black Friday

Was actually limited

To one single Day