I WENT INTO HOSPITAL FOR MINOR SURGERY # 4

 

I went into hospital for minor surgery

And the surgeon thought he was a riot

He held up the x-ray and said “Wait a minute,

If this is his spleen, then what the hell is that?”

I HEARD A VERY APT DESCRIPTION

 

I heard a very apt description

Of Gardening the other day

It suggested that Gardening was

Grown-ups going outside to play

I HEARD A VERY APT DESCRIPTION

 

I heard a very apt description

Of Gardening the other day

It suggested that Gardening was

Grown-ups going outside to play

SOME PEOPLE ARE DOWN BEAT

 

Some people are down beat

And see life as a negative

But I was born to be an optimist

Even my blood type is B Positive

SO IF THEY PUT REAL LEMONS

 

So, if they put real lemons

In the washing up liquid

Does that mean that they

Put real fairies in fairy liquid

GRETEL DIDN’T GO TO THE WOODS

 

Gretel didn’t go to the woods

Looking for a house of gingerbread

When she walked along with Hansel

She was looking for a muffin instead

SEND ONE BAG TO TOKYO

 

A passenger said “Send one bag to Tokyo

And the other to Paris, is that clear?”

They said at the check in desk “you’re going

To Athens so we can’t do that I fear”

“Why ever not” the man said in reply

“That’s exactly what you did last year”