21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 357

 

Did you ever see a lassie?

A lassie, a lassie?

I’m not sure terms of endearment

Of that kind are strictly PC

ARE YOU WEARING AN UNDERSLIP?

 

Are you wearing an underslip?

Are you really by thunder

Would you like to slip out of it

Or should I just slip under

IF A PAIR IS A TWOSOME # 2

 

If a pair is a twosome

And a trio is a threesome

A quartet, a foursome

Then a solo is a lonesome

A VERTICALLY CHALLENGED MAN

A vertically challenged man

Went to see his GP

Without an appointment

And he was told at reception

That the doctor would see him

But he’d have to be a little patient

MY WIFE WAS IN THE BATHROOM

 

My wife was in the bathroom

When I suddenly heard her shout

She had rubbed on hand cream

And couldn’t turn the knob to get out

THE PLURAL OF BOX

 

So, if it is correct that

The plural of box is boxes

Then why is the plural of ox

Oxen and not Oxes

THE HOUSE MOUSE RULE

 

If in your home sweet home

You find a solitary mouse

Then it is perfectly acceptable

To call it a house mouse

But if in your home sweet home

You find that you have mice

Then it is quite unacceptable

To refer to them as hice mice