I had breakfast with an Ornithologist
And I thought the
waiter made a mistake
But it turned out it
was me who was wrong
He really had ordered
some Corn Crake
Sunday, 1 January 2023
I HAD BREAKFAST WITH AN ORNITHOLOGIST
ARE YOU WEARING BLUE LIPSTICK?
Are you wearing blue lipstick?
Then you must be a
Dutch chick
Because I’ve heard the
song Ma’am
About blue lips from
Amsterdam
APPLE ARE BUILDING A NEW HQ
Apple are building a new HQ
Its secret design,
nobody knows
But one thing we know
for sure
The office won’t have
windows
Saturday, 31 December 2022
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 330
If wishes were horses,
Beggars would ride.
If turnips were watches,
I would wear one by my side.
Or buy a knock off
From the Veg market
JANUARY BLUES
I hate the month of January
Every single day from
New Year’s day
To the 31st day
I hate the month of
January
With every fibre of my
being
You may say it’s just
the January blues
That colours my views
But it’s much deeper
than that.
It’s always such a
long depressing month
With dreary weather
and miserable people
It’s the inevitable
aftermath
That follows a joyful
Christmas
It’s going back to
work to the same depressing job
You so happily left
behind you on Christmas Eve
It’s the empty bank
account
And the look ahead at
the five long weeks till payday
Its New Year’s
resolutions and not keeping them
I hate the month of
January
From day one, New
Year’s Day
With its reminder of
things to come
Another bloody awful
year ahead
January fills me with
dread
NEW YEARS RESOLUTION # 1
I was separated from my wife
Due to my serial
infidelity
And found myself in
bed again
With her best friend
Felicity
It was on New Year’s
Day
And Felicity asked me
“Did you make a
resolution?
What was it? Go on
tell me”
I replied “Not to be
unfaithful
Ever again to my wife
Pru”
As she climbed onto me,
she asked
“How’s that working
out for you?”
NEW YEARS RESOLUTION # 2
I made a New Year’s resolution
To stop having one-night
stands
Which would be easier
to do
If second dates were
in my plans
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)