Santa has helpers at Christmas
To get him
through the season
Then he
rests pretty much until Easter
He claims
fatigue is the reason
And he is
unable to fulfil his duties
Satisfying his
cute little yelper
So, he
bought Mrs. Claus a new toy
To make his
neglected wife purr
It came
with plenty of batteries
It’s known
as Santa Big helper
I don’t like lace-up shoes
And
slip-ons aren’t so hot
That just
leaves Velcro
So, I figured
why knot?
I’m not a fussy eater and there isn’t
Much I
won’t eat out of choice
But I will
not eat an oyster because
It’s like
licking phlegm off a tortoise
Are you wearing Silver tinsel?
Tied amidst
your lustrous curls
It makes
you look so beautiful
And more
like an angel than a girl
Is Santa Claus really a woman?
Why has this
not come up before?
If it were
left to a man everything
Would come
from the corner store
Bad Santa is a bit of a perve
For the girls
with a bit of curve
He reads
the naughty and nice list
But prefers the "nice and naughty list”
