Sunday, 19 December 2021

ESSENTIAL INGREDIENT

 

I have no need of Christmas

I have no need of memories

I have no desire to make plans

To join in with the festivities

 

Don’t wish me merry Christmas

I have no need of Christmas cheer

For me it won’t be Christmas

Until my darling wife is here

 

So save your merry Christmas

Don’t send your jollity my way

Keep the Christmas fizz on ice

Until she’s home on Christmas day

 

This is for all those whose loved ones have to work on Christmas day.

OH YES HE IS

 

On stage at the Victoria

The lad playing Aladdin

Was attacked from behind

But the audience tried to warn him

SELF ANALYSIS

Are you clinically obese?

Is your alcohol intake quite scary?

Do you like to dress up as a woman?

Then eat, drink and be Mary

FORCED ENTRY

I came home today to a horrible sight

All the doors and windows were smashed in

And inside, everything was gone

They had taken absolutely everything

I felt so violated so degraded

How could something like this occur?

What sort of sick person does that?

To someone's Advent calendar

Saturday, 18 December 2021

THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – FINDING FATHER CHRISTMAS (2016)

 

Christmas for Miranda (Erin Krakow) is a painful reminder of the family she never had.

Her mother died at Christmas when she was young, never revealing the identity of her father.

But, three days before Christmas, she unexpectedly received a clue as to his whereabouts that takes her to a beautiful New England town where she meets Ian (Niall Matter), a young man who helps with her search and love blossoms between them.

But when clues lead to her father's identity she faces a terrible decision, should she share the truth or keep the secret forever?

Whichever way Christmas promises to be life-changing for Miranda with a new chance at life and love.

ARE YOU WEARING ELF EARS?

 

Are you wearing elf ears?

It’s a very sweet look on you

So, take me to your workshop

And do what little elves do

GIFTS FOR EVERYONE

 

Jimmy got an iPod

Sally got an iPhone

Dad got an iPad

Mum got an iRon

Happy Christmas? iThink not