DON’T TAKE A FENCE

 

My uncle John the fence died

When I heard I felt quite sorry

It was poetic justice though

As he fell off the back of a lorry

THE THIRTEENTH SIGN

 

The thirteenth sign

Of the Zodiac year

Is Pyrex

And its symbol is crystal clear

It covers all twelve months,

Not one only

But to qualify

You have to be a test tube baby

THE GREAT LIES OF LIFE

 

No, your bum does not look big

Money isn't everything

How funny, I was just going to call you

It's great to be a Negro

I'm only going to put it in a little way

I've never done this before

They’ll ride up with wear

The cheques in the mail

Anticipation is half the fun

This will hurt me more than it hurts you

I’ll only put it in a tiny little way

I promise I won't finish in you

“This won't hurt, I promise.”

SOD IT

 

So, if several things can go wrong, the one that cause’s the most damage will be the one

Of course, if there is a worse time for something to go wrong, it will happen then

Doubtless left to themselves things will definitely go from bad to worse

If there are four ways in which it can go wrong an unprepared for fifth way will occur

Times when all seems to be going well occur when you have overlooked something

WHATS IN A NAME (3)

Did anyone else hear Willy Russell?

Did anyone else see Darcy Bussle?

Does anyone think will John Thaw?

Does anyone know is Sandie Shaw?

ONCE MORE HENRY

 

Once more onto the beach

Dear ones by the shore   

Or sit on the wall or deck chair or sun bed

OXYMORA MORE

 

Childproof, Australian Culture

Duty Free, Act Naturally

Free Trade, Airline Food

Good Grief, Almost Exactly

Pop Culture, Resident Alien

Government Organization

Found Missing Silent Scream

Legally Drunk British Fashion

Happily Married, Men At Work

Sweet Sorrow, Business Ethics

Soft Rock, Foggy Clearing

Small Crowd, New Classic