MISMATCH

I do love you
You must accept that as a given
There was never any question
Of my not loving you
But there was always something missing
You must have felt it too
A “close but no cigar” kind of feeling
So I do love you
But no matter how great the love
The uncomfortable truth is
You’re not the one
You’re not my soul mate
I wish you were
Because I do love you
But we are not a matched pair
Almost but not quite
But she’s out there
Somewhere, waiting, wondering
Maybe having this same conversation
With her mismatch
She’s out there
The perfect one
The one made for me
The one I was made for
We only get one chance
To get it right
And we have got it wrong
He is out there somewhere
Your perfect half
Who will make you whole
And make you happy
You must seek yours out
And I must search for mine

WHAT BECOMES OF THE BROKEN HEARTED?

This tale is of once upon a time
That happened not so long ago
When a man proposed to a lady
And the lady in question said no

Now you might have expected
The man to be broken hearted
But he lived happily ever after
From the moment that they parted

He slept as long as he wanted
Watched sport on TV all day
Drank from dawn till dusk
And ate every kind of takeaway

He wore comfortable clothes
And socks with his sandles
And broke wind when he wanted
Sometimes over lighted candles

But this story did not end well
For his lifestyle affected his heart
He died of a heart attack at thirty nine
After a particularly violent fart

KISS OF LIFE

The greatest gift you can bestow,
The most wonderful that I know
Is when you attend to me down below
And instantly make me swell and grow
Performing on me seductively slow
Oh what ecstasy when you blow
Until my sweet culmination apropos
With your divinely erotic fellatio

OH DREARY WINTER

Oh dreary winter
You have over stayed
Your grey skies
Are not welcome
I know spring is close
I look at the grey lake
With the duck on it
The only splash of colour
In the late winter landscape
But I see the hints of spring
Everywhere around me
And the promise of daffodils
Lilacs and butterflies
So winter its time to go
Your welcome is worn out

NATURAL HIGH

From the moment I met you
I’ve been on a high
A natural high
I feel like I’m walking on air
I giggle to my self
Or laugh out loud
For no reason
And if I start to come down
And I need a fix
I think back to our first kiss
Or the first time I held your hand
Or I re read your love letters
And I’m floating again
Or I’ll call you on the phone
Just to hear your sweet voice
And the call will last for hours
Since falling in love with you
You’ve made me feel young again
With your joy of life
As we run through sprinklers
And swing on the swings
Or make sand castles on the beach
Everything is a joy when I’m with you
Driving in the country
Queuing at the supermarket
Every moment is filled
With good conversation
Punctuated with special glances
We share each other
We share a hot shower
We share a bubble bath. We share a bed
We lie in bed and listen to the rain
My fingers playing with your hair
And I look into your eyes
And I know you love me
I see it looking back at me
Since we fell in love
I’ve been on a high
A natural high
And I never want to come down

TALES OF TOPOGRAPHIC NOTIONS

Strong hands explore
The pure silk landscape
In gentle topography
Tracing her features
Beneath his fingers
Mapping her contours
Her sensual curvature
The undulating terrain
Soft mounds contrasted
By prominent peaks
Then across the flatness
Of the tremulous plain
Thru sparse coarse undergrowth
To the hot moist valley beyond
Strong hands explore
And as fingers probe
The pure silk landscape
Reforms beneath his touch

NOSTALGIA, THOSE WERE THE DAYS

We all think that when we were young
The sun shone for 23 hours a day
Not altogether true
But it seems that way in hindsight
But things always look better looking back
They were more innocent times
More naïve times
There were things that were not said
Or not discussed in mixed company
Now anything goes
For example we didn’t have to endure
Endless TV ads for sanitary products and pantie liners
Thrush medicine or haemorrhoid cream
Or women discussing their bladder weakness or blocked bowels
Way back then we only had the three TV channels,
Which was enough
And the network shut down at 10.30
So we knew when to go to bed
And there was no such thing as daytime telly
The soap of the day was “Coronation Street“
And from America “Peyton Place”
For the kids “Noggin the Nog”
“Mr. Pastry” or the “Wombles”
“Captain Pugwash” with seaman Stanes
And Roger the cabin boy
Comedy like “Sykes”, “The Good Life”
And “Morecambe and Wise”
Sid and Hattie in the “Carry Ons
Grass hopper in “Kung Fu”
“Land of the giants”, “Blake’s Seven” and “Dr Who”
You could still watch sport on terrestrial
With “Grandstand” on the Beeb
And on ITV, Dickie Davis with “World of sport”
Now we have hundreds of channels
Showing the same programs we used to watch on three channels
In the music world the “Rolling Stones”
Were closer to puberty than senility
Music came on vinyl though we just called them records
The first record I bought was “Good news week”
By Hedgehoppers Anonymous
You could buy LP’s, singles and audio cassettes
Even 8 track though not very long lived
Petrol was only five bob a gallon
While beer was just 10p a pint
Penny chews and sweets in a jar
Oh for the time when you could still get
Treats, opal fruits and spangles
Back then gay still meant happy
And everyone wore a ticka ticka Timex on their wrist,
That you had to wind up.
It was a time when we all wanted to be in love
Like Celia Johnson and Trevor Howard in “Brief Encounter”
And we didn’t think it was corny when Bette said
“Gerry lets not ask for the moon we already have the stars”
It was a time when we all wanted to be suave and debonair
Just like Fred Astaire
And dance with panache and savoir fare
Its not that I’m a cup half empty kind of guy
But things do look better looking back
At a time before political correctness was invented
And you could laugh at a joke and not worry
That someone you have never met and probably will never meet
Might be offended by it
Or more likely upset someone who got offended on their behalf
Take me back to simpler times