VARIOUS HUMOUR

SOME OF THEM

Some make you cringe
Some drive you mad
Some make you freeze
Some scare you bad

Some are enormous
Some are minute
Some are horrendous
Some are quite cute

Some of them jump
Some cause a rash
Some make a buzz
Some make you dash

Some make you itch
Some make you sick
Some kill you slow
Some kill you quick

Some of them bite
Some of them crawl
Some are big
Some are small
But what they share
Is that insects appal
I have to be honest
I hate them all

BAGS OF SACKS

What sacks should I use?
In the garden?
Should I use plastic?
Or maybe Hessian?

I’m not sure I care
To be quite factual
I suppose it’s because
I am bi-sacksual

A BASIC FACT

A fact remains a fact
Its logic remains intact
Its basic premice is unflawed
Even if the fact is ignored

THE PEN IS MIGHTIER THAN THE SWORD

Edward Bulwer-Lytton wrote
“The pen is mightier than the sword”
This is indeed, a fine sentiment.
That we should heartily applaud
But when faced with machine gun fire
I fear the proposition is flawed

THE FOURTH EMERGENCY SERVICE

I was driving to work this morning
It was just as the day was dawning
And I noticed a parked up AA van
And next to it was a crying man
But properly weeping and wailing
Down on his knees with arms flailing
I just shook my head with a frown
I knew he was headed for a breakdown