72 Miles From The Sea

Wednesday, 11 August 2021

Tuesday’s child isn’t full of grace

Because she and her friend Trace

Are full of cheap cider and ale

And will end up in A&E without fail

My cousin died after being stung by a bee

Although he didn’t have an allergy

He was over Niagara walking a tightrope

So when he was stung there was no hope

To spice up my dreary life

I chose to hold a sex game

And threw an orgy last night,

Unfortunately, nobody came

The state is watching you, and

We live in a “Big Brother” society

Of clandestine electronic eavesdropping

And it really bugs me

I have very low self esteem

And live with low expectations

And to make matters worse

I'm terrible at self-deprecation

I don’t believe in traditions

I have no time for them

And neither did my father

Or his father before him

My wife made me go car hunting with her

As we have a family she wanted a People Carrier

And the trip went okay until I upset her

When I said that every car was a people carrier