SEXYGEN

 

Sex is very like oxygen I would say

For you take it for granted in a way

Unless you’re not getting it anyway

HE WHO LAUGHS

 

He who laughs last, laughs the longest

Is how the saying is supposed to go-est

I think who laughs last, thinks slowest

POLLIDAY

 

My sons on holiday right now

He’s left his home in tooting

He’s gone somewhere in Africa

Saying he was going parachuting

 

I was surprised when he told me

Because he suffers from vertigo

It’s not his normal kind of trip

But I admire him for having a go

 

He’s never mentioned an interest

Before in the sport of parachuting

I will ask him how he got on

When he’s back at home in tooting

 

He’s never been very adventurous

When it comes to eating either

So I was taken by surprise when

He said he’d eaten parrot burger

 

How did you get on with the vertigo?

I asked when he was home in tooting

What are you on about mother?

What’s that got to do with shooting

POLES AND HOLES

 

If the people from Poland

Are known as Poles

Why aren't people from Holland

Known as Holes

TELL ME

 

Tell me do infants

Enjoy infancy

As much as adults

Enjoy adultery?