Saturday, 12 November 2022

DEPARTMENT STORE SANTA

 

Against my better judgement

I took my young son to the store

And we queued up for an hour

So, he could see Santa Claus

 

The grotto was cheap and nasty

It was a terrible site to behold

I thought the whole thing a rip off

And my son thought he was too old

 

Santa’s little helper was pregnant

The head Elf was high as a kite

But I thought if we stayed in line

Everything would turn out alright

 

Well, he climbed onto Santa’s lap

To tell him his Christmas wish

But Santa smelled of whisky

And his trousers smelled of piss

 

It was about making memories

Well, according to my wife

But instead of a memorable visit

I think we scarred him for life

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