ABANDONING THE NATIVITY

 

It’s ironic that schools

Are abandoning the nativity

When half a dozen Schoolgirls

Could play the Virgin Mary

Although they’re not virgins

They do have their own baby

SO WHEN YOUNG MRS CLAUS ARRIVED IN TOWN

 

So, when young Mrs Claus arrived in town

I looked at her with her pure white hair

She was a pretty woman but to my discredit

I couldn’t help thinking as I looked at her

How I like the collar and cuffs to match

So obviously I was thinking of a little white fur

A PRESS RELEASE FROM SANTA CLAUS STATED

 

A press release from Santa Claus stated

That the Poles reputation had been blighted

So Mobile phones were banned, the number

Of indecent Elfies was the reason cited

THEY WON’T BE PLAYING MUSICAL CHAIRS

 

They won’t be playing musical chairs

In palaces or Royal homes

Prince Charles prefers to play a variant

Called Game of Thrones

IF YOU’RE A TAKE THAT FAN

 

If you’re a Take That fan

Then Christmas could be shocking

If you’re expecting to find

An Orange in your stocking

NO FRANKINCENSE, GOLD OR MYRRH

 

Melchior, Balthazar, and Caspar

Travelled long with Gifts to bring

Not frankincense, Gold, or myrrh

Or other valuable precious things 

But non glutenous food stuffs

As they were Wheat Free Kings

YOU CAN LIKEN IT TO RUDOLF

 

Why does the Easter Bunny

Have such a shiny nose?

You can liken it to Rudolf

The thing actually glows

Well, the answer is obvious

And I don’t mean to offend

But it’s because his powder puff

Is stuck to his rear end