YOU CAN KEEP THE SLEIGH # 2

 

You can keep the sleigh

And Rudolph and Prancer

There’s nothing Santa likes

More than a Pole Dancer

THE BRUSSELS SPROUTS

 

To some people

They can cause distress

But there is a sentiment

I‘d like to express

Sprouts are for life

Not just for Christmas

HOMELESS SNOWMAN

 

He was dressed in rags

And made from snow

A poor homeless snowman

A sad lonely snowbo

MRS CLAUS WAS COURTED

 

Mrs Claus was courted

By Santa and a man called Ray

Ray was a flash Harry

Who drove a red Chevrolet

Well, it was no contest

At the end of the day

Because although he had a fast car

Santa had a faster sleigh

CAROLS BY CANDLE LIGHT

 

Christmas is a time

Of many traditions

Like carol singing

With candle lit processions

 

But not anymore

A years old tradition

Has had to go

For fear of litigation

 

“Health and safety”

So, gets on my wick

As this year we had

Carols by glow stick

I EAT EVERYTHING

 

I love Christmas

The naughty and nice

I eat absolutely everything

Until I pay the price

And I make a Yule log

That I have to flush twice

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 296

 

Rainbow to windward

Stay indoors all day

Rainbow to leeward

Let’s go out to play