When you’re on the pull
If you want to break the ice
Say something funny
Or say something nice
Be devastatingly witty
Or say something clever
Be complimentary
Or just lie in your endeavour
“Can I have your picture?”
You ask to establish a
premise
“So, I can show Santa
Claus
What I want for
Christmas?”
Ebenezer Scrooge went to court,
Accused of shagging a
cat
The judge dismissed
the case in a jiffy
And said in all his
years as a judge,
That he'd never known
Scrooge
To put anything into a kitty
Breakfast time comes
Just after day breaks
When Santa’s little
helpers
Eat their Frosted
Flakes!
Rudolph is doing stand up
At this year’s Christmas
do
But between each gag
he says
“This one will sleigh
you”
It was the office Christmas party
Where I met my girl
Lottie
I felt really out of
place
Every girl there was
totty
I was out of my
comfort zone
They were all pouty
and hottie
I was just about to go
home
When she said, “Are
you Scottie?”
I said, “yes how did
you know?”
“I asked” she said
“I’m Lottie,
So, you could ask me
to dance”
I looked at her like
she was Potty
She just smiled at me
patiently
I smiled back and said,
“What me?”
She nodded and smiled
again
And was swept off my
feet by Lottie
Eppie Marly's thinks she’s fine,
And won’t go out to herd the swine,
She lies in her bed till eight or nine,
Are you wearing cologne?
You’re wearing “Black
Knight”
What is going on?
Something’s not right
Your wearing you’re
cologne
And it’s a school
night
It’s not your birthday
So, you’re not due a
delight
It’s definitely not
Christmas
I know I have that
right
It’s a snow day
tomorrow?
Ok turn out the light
