72 Miles From The Sea

Monday, 7 November 2022

Frosty the snowman really lost his temper

And his behaviour was an absolute disgrace

He kept going on about an aggressive carrot

And he kept saying "just get out of my face"

Rudolph was so obnoxious that the

Other reindeer threatened to strike

He was really very unpopular and they

Thought he was RUDE-olph more like

This is a sure-fire way of slimming down

As dieting tips go it’s an absolute winner

If you make sure you associate with the obese

You will automatically look thinner

Rudolf was such an obnoxious reindeer

The song about him was just a farse

The other reindeer all hated him and said

He could stick his red nose up his arse

My sister was afraid of Santa Claus

The thought of him made her sick

The rest of us all loved him to bits

But she was clearly Claus-trophobic

Do you know what Santa brings naughty

Boys and girls so they are not excluded?

It’s not coal anymore so don’t think that

Its batteries, labelled "toy not included"

The difference between Santa Claus

And a serial philanderer as it goes

Is in essence a total lack of self-control

Because Santa stopped at three ho’s