MY DAUGHTER WAS GIVEN A NOVELTY GIFT

 

My daughter was given a novelty gift

Which really wasn’t intended to confuse

But the look on her face was a picture

When she held a pair of chocolate shoes

WHEN GINGERBREAD MEN SLEEP

 

When a gingerbread man lays

On his bed Perchance to sleep

He does so every single night

Laying down on a cookie sheet

GRANDMA GOT RUN OVER BY A REINDEER

 

Grandma got run over by a reindeer

When into the roadway she strayed

It was an accident waiting to happen

Because Santa Claus was totally slayed

JW ADVENT CALENDAR # 2

 

You can now buy a Jehovah’s Witness

Advent calendar

I’ve never seen one before

I don’t know what message is inside

Because for some reason

You can’t open a single door

Uncanny Christmas Tales – (017) The Good Life - Silly, But It's Fun

 

For those who are visiting from another planet the Good Life, Written by John Esmonde and Bob Larbey was about a man who, on reaching his fortieth birthday, decides to give up the rat race and becomes self-sufficient.

The man having the midlife crisis is Tom Good (Richard Briers), who with the help and support of his long-suffering wife Barbara, (Felicity Kendal) turns his detached Surbiton home, into an urban farm.

This doesn't go down too well with their good friends and neighbours, Jerry Leadbetter (Paul Eddington) and his snooty wife Margot, (Penelope Keith).

The Christmas episode, “Silly, But It's Fun”, first broadcast 26th December 1977 is in my opinion the funniest Christmas sitcom ever made.

Most Christmas sitcoms highlight the most negative aspects of the day creating a kind of nightmarish microcosm of family life at Christmas.

The Good Life was the story of contrasts, with the Good’s making the best of the meagre resources they had, while the Leadbetter’s just bought the best of everything and lots of it.

In “ Silly, But It's Fun” Margo ordered Christmas to be delivered from Harrods on Christmas Eve but refused delivery when the tree was six inches shorter than the one, she had ordered.

As she rejected the tree, she also rejected everything else, including Jerry’s gin, under the impression that Harrods would redeliver Christmas including a tree of the requisite height for her later that day.

She was sadly mistaken and on Christmas Day she had to phone around cancelling all their Christmas engagements under the pretext that Jerry has Chicken pox.

Jerry was unperturbed at having political chicken pox but horrified when he discovered that there was no more gin.

Enter the Goods, who save the day by inviting the Leadbetter’s to their house for the day and a good time was had by all, they all got plastered on pea pod burgundy and played silly party games.

The moral of the tale being that you can’t buy Christmas you have to make it yourself.

  

I LOVE MY PETER PAN JOKE

 

I love my Peter Pan joke

It’s the funniest I’ve told

And I tell it over and over

And it never gets old

SANTA ASKED ABIGAIL

Santa asked as a little girl climbed onto his lap,

"And what would you like for Christmas Abigail?"

The child stared at him open mouthed with horror

And then she snapped "Didn't you get my E-mail?"