After the tearful reunion of the Oliver girls we all retired to bed.
The nurse stayed up all night with Katy, Marion slept in my bed, Anne went in the spare room, Claire crashed in the study and I was in the Dining room, well that isn’t quite true, obviously, I pretended to sleep in the dining room for the sake of propriety but really I slept with Claire.
The next day Claire and I woke early and after an early morning fumble we lay awake talking.
She said she would be spending Easter with her husband Brian as she did all the holidays and I reluctantly told her I would spend it with Georgia.
I was reluctant to say because I felt guilty talking about Georgia when I was in bed with another woman.
Though on the guilt front I figured that even though I hadn’t adhered to Georgia’s ultimatum I had at least accumulated a considerable amount of brownie points looking after Katy which should have balanced the scale in my favour, that was what I was hoping at least, that coupled with the trip I was planning for her birthday.
I also felt guilty discussing my other life with Claire; she clearly picked up on my hesitancy because she said
“This is the only way for us, don’t feel guilty, it’s supposed to be guilt free sex”
“With a little bit of love thrown in” she continued and kissed me.
After we made love again, quietly, we made sure we were still up and about before anyone else.
She spent much of day with us, which was just as well as Marion had another fainting episode.
Claire again ordered her to her bed and then spent some considerable time examining her.
Marion recovered sufficiently to come down for dinner after which Claire went home.
When I woke up on Easter Sunday I found the village in the teeth of a storm, I suppose as March had come in like a lamb it was duty bound to go out like a lion.
The first thing I did was to phone the Gregory household to see if Geoff was still going to Roehampton to pick Georgia up.
As I suspected he was going to do the sensible thing and delay it until later in the day when the storm had moved away, which meant I wouldn’t see her until the next day.
As I was then at a loose end I decided to brave the elements and take Anne down to St Lucy’s for the Easter Service, Marion wanted to go too but we managed to convince her otherwise.
Anne’s appearance in the church turned a few heads because of her striking resemblance to Katy but she was warmly received to such an extent I had to drag her away on the pretence of being late for lunch.
It was a lie about lunch, as it wasn’t going to happen until after I went home and cooked it.
As I wasn’t planning to be home on Easter Sunday I hadn’t anything special planned, in fact I had nothing planned at all.
So lunch was a bit of a mish mosh cobbled together from what I had in.
After lunch was eaten and cleared away Marion went to bed for a rest while Anne sat with Katy and I went to my study to catch up with correspondence.
On Monday morning before I left the house, the three sisters were all together in Katy’s room, talking ten to the dozen.
“Blimey, it’s like the witch’s scene from Macbeth” I said
“Don’t be Cheeky” Katy said, “Are you off to see Georgia?”
“Yes, I’ll be back later” I replied “by the way, for lunch you’ll find There’s some eye of newt and toe of frog in the fridge”
“Yes thank you” Katy said “see you later”
Then I stuck my head round the door and said
“The scale of dragon is in the cupboard with the other condiments”
“Go now or we’ll shrivel your extremities” Anne shouted after me.
When I got to Georgia’s house I noticed Geoff’s car wasn’t on the drive.
I knocked on the door but there was no reply, so I knocked again and was just about to give up and go home when the door opened, well just a crack, and Georgia peered around the door at me.
“Hi Hon, I was beginning to think you weren’t in” I said
“Hello Mr Fisher” she said in a lispy Violet Elizabeth voice “Mummy and Daddy aren’t here”
“Oh” I said and then it dawned on me that little Georgie wanted to role-play “perhaps I should come in and wait”
“Yeth” she lisped and opened the door.
As I closed the door She stood in the hall with her hair tied in pigtails and wearing her old school uniform.
“Do you like my uniform?” she asked as she stood pigeon toed in her stocking feet with her hands behind her back.
“Yes you look very pretty” I said answered as I took my coat off.
“Would you like to see my toys?” Georgie asked
“Yes please” I replied, “I think I’d like that”
“Come on then” she said and darted upstairs.
As I followed the giggling schoolgirl up the stairs it occurred to me that I’d never seen her bedroom.
I reached the top stair just in time to see Georgia skip across the landing and into her room I quickly followed her into her room, which was decorated pretty much exclusively in girlie pink.
Georgia was kneeling on the bed bouncing up and down excitedly and as she bounced so did her unfettered breasts.
“Would you like to see my cuddlies?” she asked
“I can already see them,” I thought to myself
“Yes I would” I replied and Georgia turned around and crawled along the bed towards the great pile of soft toys displayed across her pillows affording me a great view of her navy blue knickered arse.
“this ones called Bunny, this ones called Henry” she said “and this ones called Charlie”
“Oh I like Charlie’s” I said as I reached around her and fondled her breasts
“Oh Mr Fisher, I don’t think mummy and daddy would like you playing with my cuddlies like that” she said
“Well show me more cuddlies then” I said, “what’s that one called right at the other end?”
I reluctantly let go of her tits as she reached over to pick up a threadbare Tiger.
As she did so I reached under her little plaid skirt and rolled her navy blue knickers off her buttocks.
“Oh Mr Fisher” she said a second before my fingers slipped into her creamy gash.
Georgia with her face now buried in the mound of cuddlies moaned loudly as I buried my fingers into her cunny.
I was perfectly positioned behind her, where I could comfortably fiddle with her fanny with my right hand and extricate my cock from my trousers with my left.
It wasn’t long before. I brought the naughty little schoolgirl to climax.
“Oh Mr Fisher” she gasped minus the lisp.
I removed my fingers from her pink moist pussy and using my left hand I guided my cock towards its juicy destination.
"Ohhh” Georgia said as I penetrated her. "So good”
Her moans were stifled amongst the Teddy’s as I skewered her syrupy quim.
As I shortened my stroke the bed started to squeak and the headboard began to hit the wall before Georgia screamed a loud muffled scream into her toys and a second later I erupted inside her.
Just before I withdrew my sticky shaft from her I thought to myself that having Georgia in her bed amidst all the soft toys of her childhood was like taking her innocence all over again.
Monday, 13 May 2013
An Antidote To Writers Block (Part 68) The Long Good Friday
When Molly had finally finished with me, she had to rush off to work, as she was already an hour late, I was completely knackered again.
I know I should have felt guilty after my sinful afternoon interlude, I should have felt guilty but I didn’t, Molly was my fuck buddy, my kissing cousin and as blood is thicker than water I wasn’t really cheating on Georgia.
It was just after four o’clock when Molly drove away sticky lipped and smiling.
Marion phoned to say not to cater for her at dinner, as she and Pandora would eat out.
So I went to the freezer and selected a pasta bake from the well-stocked freezer and put it into the oven to warm.
Meanwhile I made a cup of tea and went upstairs to wake Katy.
At six o’clock I was sitting in the kitchen when the front door opened and Claire walked in with her medical bag.
“Hello” she called
“In the kitchen” I called back
Because she had been away at a conference and then she was on call we hadn’t seen her for a while.
When she walked in she was dressed in her familiar professional garb.
“You’re looking very lovely doctor” I said, “Do you want to feel my pulse?”
“Shhh” she whispered
“Its ok she’s upstairs” I reassured her “she’s in the bath”
“Ok” she said, “I’ll go up and see her”
“Then will you feel my pulse?” I asked
“Stop it” she said quietly and kissed me
The kiss was lingering and provocative and when she broke off Claire smiled coyly at me
“Something smells nice,” she said
“Not as lovely as you” I said cheesily
“Behave,” she said
“Are you going to eat with us?” I asked
“Yes I’d like that” she replied
As I walked her to the stairs I thought that, as she hadn’t seen Katy in a while I should warn her that she might notice a significant difference.
“I know what to expect,” she said
We ate together and I could see Claire assessing what Katy was eating and making a mental note.
Her portion size had decreased significantly over recent weeks and when I helped her into the bath it was obvious that there was less flesh on her bones.
I noticed just carrying her up the stairs that there was less of her.
After we had finished eating, Claire helped me clear away and when Katy went off to the loo she asked
“What are you doing over Easter?”
“Nothing much” I replied, “Georgia isn’t coming home until Easter Sunday”
“Do you fancy a couple of days away?” she asked
“Are there any hotels left that we can show our faces in?” I replied
“Not at a hotel, a colleague has a cottage near Godalming we can use” she corrected me “You’ll have to suffer my cooking”
“I’m willing to take the risk,” I said
“I’ll pick you up at Farncombe Station on Thursday night then” she said “and we can stay until Saturday”
Just then Katy returned from the toilet.
“What are you two hatching?” she asked with a chuckle “as if I didn’t know”
Claire left soon after that and met Marion at the door coming the other way.
Friday evening passed with the three of us enjoying simple pleasures and congenial company, but it proved to be the lull before the storm as later on Friday night Katy took a turn for the worse so the weekend was rather less tranquil than I would have hoped and was spent in constant anxiety.
Her appetite had been slowly tailing off for some while but she had been in a lot more discomfort than she allowed us to know.
Claire was called and we had two days of uncertainty as the doctor tried to get her medication right.
On Monday it was decided to move her back downstairs and into the hospital bed in the lounge.
Claire was in regular attendance while still covering her commitments at the practise.
Late on Monday Claire met will Molly to put the second phase of nursing care into effect.
This plan dispensed with the district nurse visits which were to be replaced by a night nurse arriving at 7.00 pm and leaving 12 hours later.
When we first started discussing nursing care back in February I remembered Claire saying the night nurse wouldn’t be required until near the end.
So on Tuesday morning when Claire told me a night nurse would be there that night I went cold.
I grabbed her arm and asked in hushed tones
“Is it that time already?”
All Claire said in reply was
“You’d better find the other sister soon”
After Claire had gone I phoned Olivier at the surgery to see if there had been any word from the Sudan.
“Yes” she replied “and no”
“Here we go again,” I thought
“I had a very garbled call from a woman, who I think was Anne, but she was very incoherent”
“What makes you think it was her?” I asked
“Well she sounded very far away,” she said realising as the words left her mouth how stupid they sounded,
And they sounded very stupid indeed and had it been anyone other than Oliver Adamson saying it I would have dismissed them.
“Could you make anything out at all”? I asked
“She definitely said “two days” and I think she also said call again”” she said “but the rest was all rather Norman Collier like”
“Ok thanks Olivier” I said “let me know if she calls again?”
“I will” she replied and hung up.
As Katy was up and down Claire and I had decided to cancel our trip away because of her crisis, there would be time enough for what we had in mind at a later date.
It was a very uneasy time for us all and even Marion, normally very bright and bubbly was very subdued and off colour.
And as we were all focused on Katy no one had noticed she wasn’t eating properly and after lunch she fainted.
Once she was revived Claire ordered her to bed and chastised her for her foolishness, putting herself and the baby at risk.
Later on Wednesday evening the phone rang and when I picked up the call a much-exited Olivier was on the line.
“It was her, it was her,” she shouted.
“Ok calm down” I said, “what did she say?”
“She’s going to catch the first available flight” she continued “which should arrive at Heathrow on Good Friday”
“Brilliant” I said “well done you”
“I don’t have any other details yet, Anne will ring again when she has her flight confirmed”
On Thursday we had a visit from the Bishop who on hearing of Katy’s condition thought it advisable to tend to her spiritual needs.
“How is she?” he asked
“She’s been better, but she’s not on the threshold yet” I replied
“Good” he said “and thank you for all you are dong”
“There is no need to thank me,” I said
“But it’s a very noble thing you are doing Mr Fisher”
“Not really Bishop I just have a lot of sinning to atone for” I replied
“No one sins as much as that” he said
“You really don’t know me at all do you Bishop,” I thought to myself.
Then Olivier called me on with the flight details for Anne’s flight from Sudan.
Originally I was going to spend the whole of the Easter weekend with Georgia, but she called me to say she was going to a gig in Brixton on the Saturday night with her housemates
Then Claire and I were going to stay at a friend’s cottage for a couple of nights but we cancelled that in the wake of Katy’s health crisis.
But actually what we both ended up doing on Good Friday was to wait for hours in the arrivals hall at Heathrow for the inbound flight from Khartoum.
I had left the house at 8 o’clock that morning on the pretext that I was going to visit my parents in Muswell Hill.
In reality Claire picked me up at Guildford station from where we drove to the Airport.
We arrived in the terminal just after 9 am and it was absolutely heaving and the arrivals board was liberally peppered with delays and cancellations.
With cancellations you know the score and you can turn round and go home but with a delay you don’t know what to do, go or stay.
All we knew was that it wasn’t on time, we had no idea of just how long it would be, and had we known we would still have been at the airport four hours later then we would have gone home again.
It was at 1.30pm as we had just finished our lunch when the board started to sort itself out and we finally had a definitive arrival time, 20.45pm.
Claire and I looked at each other in despair.
“This is not how I envisaged spending the day with you” Claire said
“I know” I replied “but I have an idea, come on”
We left the terminal and joined the queue at the Taxi rank.
After about ten minutes we were in the back of a black cab.
And I said to the driver “Holiday Inn, please”.
“Oh Goody” Claire whispered, “I’m horny”
The problem was when we got to the hotel it was also packed and we had to wait, so we went in the bar and we were there for almost an hour and a half before a room became available.
This was problematic because by then Claire was well oiled with the best part of a bottle of wine and the simmering fire in her loins had reached boiling point.
The receptionist handed me the key card and said something banal about having a nice stay and we headed toward the lift at a brisk pace.
“Are you wearing your practical pants?” I asked her as we entered the lift
“You’ll find out as soon as we get upstairs” Claire slurred and pressed floor 9.
Then I pressed 3, which was the floor we actually wanted.
The doors closed just in time to prevent a rather oily looking man in and expensive suit, and the moment doors closed Claire pinned me in the corner and thrust her tongue in my mouth
Then with a “ping” the door opened again to reveal an elderly couple, Claire resumed her position beside me and wiped her mouth on her sleeve.
The couple entered the lift and stood in front of us as the doors closed again.
This was the cue for Claire to start rubbing the bulge in my trousers.
The lift slowly ascended continuing its journey first to the 9th floor then back down to 3, by which time my cock was straining to escape.
I walked as quickly as I the swelling in my pants would allow which was actually very slowly where as Dr Feelgood was streets ahead of me.
So after what seemed like an age I reached our room, Claire was already inside and when I closed the door she emerged from the bathroom as good as naked.
Most of her clothes were strewn about the floor the only thing she still had on was a cardigan not quite long enough to conceal her bush.
Her breasts were just about covered and her erect nipples and a single button appeared to be the only things holding the garment in place.
“What kept you?” she said closing the distance between us
“Sorry Doctor” I said eyeing her up and down “Am I late for my medical?”
“Never mind let’s get started and check your blood pressure” she said undoing my trousers with great manual dexterity and tugging my old chap from the confines of my pants.
“Are you sure that you’re a proper doctor?” I said, “I don’t think that’s the way to check blood pressure”
“Trust me I’m a professional” She said and started tugging on my shaft “you’re in safe hands”
“Whatever you say doc” I answered and kissed her as all the while she was slowly manoeuvring me backwards.
I couldn’t go fast, firstly I was going backwards and secondly with my trousers at half-mast I could only shuffle like a penguin.
I felt something pressing against my calves and Claire let go of my cock and pushed me sharply backwards.
To my great relief I landed on the sofa and Claire was instantly astride me.
“Now we need to increase your heart rate,” she said in a very lascivious way.
She wrapped her arms around my neck and hoisted herself onto me.
My cock was so hard and her pussy was so wet and welcoming it took little more than Nano seconds for her cunny to completely engulf me.
“So far, so good” she exclaimed as I gripped onto her buttocks as she rose and fell on my shaft.
We kissed briefly and she snorted through her nose as she upped the tempo.
We stopped kissing and Claire tongued my ear and I felt her breath on my skin and heard her course rasping breaths.
She moaned loudly in self-satisfied receipt of each length she took from me.
Claire had me pinned down and her arms were still wrapped tightly around my neck as she expertly rode me.
I released my grip on her cheeks and sought out her plump tits.
As I squeezed her breasts and toyed with her teats, her moans were growing louder as she raced towards orgasm.
As we reached the summit she was tiring and I had to reluctantly abandon her titties and regain my previous hold on her arse in order to steady the ship.
She drove on through gritted teeth and her hoarse panting in my ear told me she was desperately close and then with a yelp she cried out in orgasm and I came seconds’ later empting my aching sack into her.
We stayed locked in passions embrace for some time, panting hard.
“I think” she panted, “You’re in pretty good shape”
Then Claire laughed lustily which made her muscles contract randomly around my shaft and caused me to twitch.
“Hmmm” we murmured
I woke suddenly with a start, and it took a moment for me to remember where I was.
Claire was still asleep next to me and I cuddled up behind her and began fondling her.
“What time is it?” she asked
I looked at my phone and it was 8.05 pm.
“Plenty of time” I assured her
“Good” she replied
When we had finished and we lay in the afterglow I looked at my watch again and nudged her.
“Come on we have to go,” I said
“What? I thought you said we had plenty of time” she exclaimed
“I lied” I replied
We got to the arrivals hall at 9.15 and quickly checked the boards and the flight hadn’t even landed yet.
“See I told you we had plenty of time” I said
We waited patiently at the gate and studied the passengers as they filed towards us.
We had her name boldly written on a piece of card, which we held up so she wouldn’t miss us.
But as it turned out we didn’t need it as we both instantly recognized her. She was a well-tanned slightly taller version of Katy.
We finally left the terminal at 10.30pm and arrived back in the village an hour later.
Claire had texted Marion to say we were on the way so the lights were still on.
I opened the door and we quietly went in, Marion was in the hall and quietly came to meet us and hugged and kissed Anne.
Then Anne slipped off her coat and tiptoed along the hall.
Once she had reached the door to the lounge she took a breath and walked in.
“Hello baby girl” she said
Katy turned towards the voice and took a double take before she responded
“Annie? Is that really you?” and then she cried.
I know I should have felt guilty after my sinful afternoon interlude, I should have felt guilty but I didn’t, Molly was my fuck buddy, my kissing cousin and as blood is thicker than water I wasn’t really cheating on Georgia.
It was just after four o’clock when Molly drove away sticky lipped and smiling.
Marion phoned to say not to cater for her at dinner, as she and Pandora would eat out.
So I went to the freezer and selected a pasta bake from the well-stocked freezer and put it into the oven to warm.
Meanwhile I made a cup of tea and went upstairs to wake Katy.
At six o’clock I was sitting in the kitchen when the front door opened and Claire walked in with her medical bag.
“Hello” she called
“In the kitchen” I called back
Because she had been away at a conference and then she was on call we hadn’t seen her for a while.
When she walked in she was dressed in her familiar professional garb.
“You’re looking very lovely doctor” I said, “Do you want to feel my pulse?”
“Shhh” she whispered
“Its ok she’s upstairs” I reassured her “she’s in the bath”
“Ok” she said, “I’ll go up and see her”
“Then will you feel my pulse?” I asked
“Stop it” she said quietly and kissed me
The kiss was lingering and provocative and when she broke off Claire smiled coyly at me
“Something smells nice,” she said
“Not as lovely as you” I said cheesily
“Behave,” she said
“Are you going to eat with us?” I asked
“Yes I’d like that” she replied
As I walked her to the stairs I thought that, as she hadn’t seen Katy in a while I should warn her that she might notice a significant difference.
“I know what to expect,” she said
We ate together and I could see Claire assessing what Katy was eating and making a mental note.
Her portion size had decreased significantly over recent weeks and when I helped her into the bath it was obvious that there was less flesh on her bones.
I noticed just carrying her up the stairs that there was less of her.
After we had finished eating, Claire helped me clear away and when Katy went off to the loo she asked
“What are you doing over Easter?”
“Nothing much” I replied, “Georgia isn’t coming home until Easter Sunday”
“Do you fancy a couple of days away?” she asked
“Are there any hotels left that we can show our faces in?” I replied
“Not at a hotel, a colleague has a cottage near Godalming we can use” she corrected me “You’ll have to suffer my cooking”
“I’m willing to take the risk,” I said
“I’ll pick you up at Farncombe Station on Thursday night then” she said “and we can stay until Saturday”
Just then Katy returned from the toilet.
“What are you two hatching?” she asked with a chuckle “as if I didn’t know”
Claire left soon after that and met Marion at the door coming the other way.
Friday evening passed with the three of us enjoying simple pleasures and congenial company, but it proved to be the lull before the storm as later on Friday night Katy took a turn for the worse so the weekend was rather less tranquil than I would have hoped and was spent in constant anxiety.
Her appetite had been slowly tailing off for some while but she had been in a lot more discomfort than she allowed us to know.
Claire was called and we had two days of uncertainty as the doctor tried to get her medication right.
On Monday it was decided to move her back downstairs and into the hospital bed in the lounge.
Claire was in regular attendance while still covering her commitments at the practise.
Late on Monday Claire met will Molly to put the second phase of nursing care into effect.
This plan dispensed with the district nurse visits which were to be replaced by a night nurse arriving at 7.00 pm and leaving 12 hours later.
When we first started discussing nursing care back in February I remembered Claire saying the night nurse wouldn’t be required until near the end.
So on Tuesday morning when Claire told me a night nurse would be there that night I went cold.
I grabbed her arm and asked in hushed tones
“Is it that time already?”
All Claire said in reply was
“You’d better find the other sister soon”
After Claire had gone I phoned Olivier at the surgery to see if there had been any word from the Sudan.
“Yes” she replied “and no”
“Here we go again,” I thought
“I had a very garbled call from a woman, who I think was Anne, but she was very incoherent”
“What makes you think it was her?” I asked
“Well she sounded very far away,” she said realising as the words left her mouth how stupid they sounded,
And they sounded very stupid indeed and had it been anyone other than Oliver Adamson saying it I would have dismissed them.
“Could you make anything out at all”? I asked
“She definitely said “two days” and I think she also said call again”” she said “but the rest was all rather Norman Collier like”
“Ok thanks Olivier” I said “let me know if she calls again?”
“I will” she replied and hung up.
As Katy was up and down Claire and I had decided to cancel our trip away because of her crisis, there would be time enough for what we had in mind at a later date.
It was a very uneasy time for us all and even Marion, normally very bright and bubbly was very subdued and off colour.
And as we were all focused on Katy no one had noticed she wasn’t eating properly and after lunch she fainted.
Once she was revived Claire ordered her to bed and chastised her for her foolishness, putting herself and the baby at risk.
Later on Wednesday evening the phone rang and when I picked up the call a much-exited Olivier was on the line.
“It was her, it was her,” she shouted.
“Ok calm down” I said, “what did she say?”
“She’s going to catch the first available flight” she continued “which should arrive at Heathrow on Good Friday”
“Brilliant” I said “well done you”
“I don’t have any other details yet, Anne will ring again when she has her flight confirmed”
On Thursday we had a visit from the Bishop who on hearing of Katy’s condition thought it advisable to tend to her spiritual needs.
“How is she?” he asked
“She’s been better, but she’s not on the threshold yet” I replied
“Good” he said “and thank you for all you are dong”
“There is no need to thank me,” I said
“But it’s a very noble thing you are doing Mr Fisher”
“Not really Bishop I just have a lot of sinning to atone for” I replied
“No one sins as much as that” he said
“You really don’t know me at all do you Bishop,” I thought to myself.
Then Olivier called me on with the flight details for Anne’s flight from Sudan.
Originally I was going to spend the whole of the Easter weekend with Georgia, but she called me to say she was going to a gig in Brixton on the Saturday night with her housemates
Then Claire and I were going to stay at a friend’s cottage for a couple of nights but we cancelled that in the wake of Katy’s health crisis.
But actually what we both ended up doing on Good Friday was to wait for hours in the arrivals hall at Heathrow for the inbound flight from Khartoum.
I had left the house at 8 o’clock that morning on the pretext that I was going to visit my parents in Muswell Hill.
In reality Claire picked me up at Guildford station from where we drove to the Airport.
We arrived in the terminal just after 9 am and it was absolutely heaving and the arrivals board was liberally peppered with delays and cancellations.
With cancellations you know the score and you can turn round and go home but with a delay you don’t know what to do, go or stay.
All we knew was that it wasn’t on time, we had no idea of just how long it would be, and had we known we would still have been at the airport four hours later then we would have gone home again.
It was at 1.30pm as we had just finished our lunch when the board started to sort itself out and we finally had a definitive arrival time, 20.45pm.
Claire and I looked at each other in despair.
“This is not how I envisaged spending the day with you” Claire said
“I know” I replied “but I have an idea, come on”
We left the terminal and joined the queue at the Taxi rank.
After about ten minutes we were in the back of a black cab.
And I said to the driver “Holiday Inn, please”.
“Oh Goody” Claire whispered, “I’m horny”
The problem was when we got to the hotel it was also packed and we had to wait, so we went in the bar and we were there for almost an hour and a half before a room became available.
This was problematic because by then Claire was well oiled with the best part of a bottle of wine and the simmering fire in her loins had reached boiling point.
The receptionist handed me the key card and said something banal about having a nice stay and we headed toward the lift at a brisk pace.
“Are you wearing your practical pants?” I asked her as we entered the lift
“You’ll find out as soon as we get upstairs” Claire slurred and pressed floor 9.
Then I pressed 3, which was the floor we actually wanted.
The doors closed just in time to prevent a rather oily looking man in and expensive suit, and the moment doors closed Claire pinned me in the corner and thrust her tongue in my mouth
Then with a “ping” the door opened again to reveal an elderly couple, Claire resumed her position beside me and wiped her mouth on her sleeve.
The couple entered the lift and stood in front of us as the doors closed again.
This was the cue for Claire to start rubbing the bulge in my trousers.
The lift slowly ascended continuing its journey first to the 9th floor then back down to 3, by which time my cock was straining to escape.
I walked as quickly as I the swelling in my pants would allow which was actually very slowly where as Dr Feelgood was streets ahead of me.
So after what seemed like an age I reached our room, Claire was already inside and when I closed the door she emerged from the bathroom as good as naked.
Most of her clothes were strewn about the floor the only thing she still had on was a cardigan not quite long enough to conceal her bush.
Her breasts were just about covered and her erect nipples and a single button appeared to be the only things holding the garment in place.
“What kept you?” she said closing the distance between us
“Sorry Doctor” I said eyeing her up and down “Am I late for my medical?”
“Never mind let’s get started and check your blood pressure” she said undoing my trousers with great manual dexterity and tugging my old chap from the confines of my pants.
“Are you sure that you’re a proper doctor?” I said, “I don’t think that’s the way to check blood pressure”
“Trust me I’m a professional” She said and started tugging on my shaft “you’re in safe hands”
“Whatever you say doc” I answered and kissed her as all the while she was slowly manoeuvring me backwards.
I couldn’t go fast, firstly I was going backwards and secondly with my trousers at half-mast I could only shuffle like a penguin.
I felt something pressing against my calves and Claire let go of my cock and pushed me sharply backwards.
To my great relief I landed on the sofa and Claire was instantly astride me.
“Now we need to increase your heart rate,” she said in a very lascivious way.
She wrapped her arms around my neck and hoisted herself onto me.
My cock was so hard and her pussy was so wet and welcoming it took little more than Nano seconds for her cunny to completely engulf me.
“So far, so good” she exclaimed as I gripped onto her buttocks as she rose and fell on my shaft.
We kissed briefly and she snorted through her nose as she upped the tempo.
We stopped kissing and Claire tongued my ear and I felt her breath on my skin and heard her course rasping breaths.
She moaned loudly in self-satisfied receipt of each length she took from me.
Claire had me pinned down and her arms were still wrapped tightly around my neck as she expertly rode me.
I released my grip on her cheeks and sought out her plump tits.
As I squeezed her breasts and toyed with her teats, her moans were growing louder as she raced towards orgasm.
As we reached the summit she was tiring and I had to reluctantly abandon her titties and regain my previous hold on her arse in order to steady the ship.
She drove on through gritted teeth and her hoarse panting in my ear told me she was desperately close and then with a yelp she cried out in orgasm and I came seconds’ later empting my aching sack into her.
We stayed locked in passions embrace for some time, panting hard.
“I think” she panted, “You’re in pretty good shape”
Then Claire laughed lustily which made her muscles contract randomly around my shaft and caused me to twitch.
“Hmmm” we murmured
I woke suddenly with a start, and it took a moment for me to remember where I was.
Claire was still asleep next to me and I cuddled up behind her and began fondling her.
“What time is it?” she asked
I looked at my phone and it was 8.05 pm.
“Plenty of time” I assured her
“Good” she replied
When we had finished and we lay in the afterglow I looked at my watch again and nudged her.
“Come on we have to go,” I said
“What? I thought you said we had plenty of time” she exclaimed
“I lied” I replied
We got to the arrivals hall at 9.15 and quickly checked the boards and the flight hadn’t even landed yet.
“See I told you we had plenty of time” I said
We waited patiently at the gate and studied the passengers as they filed towards us.
We had her name boldly written on a piece of card, which we held up so she wouldn’t miss us.
But as it turned out we didn’t need it as we both instantly recognized her. She was a well-tanned slightly taller version of Katy.
We finally left the terminal at 10.30pm and arrived back in the village an hour later.
Claire had texted Marion to say we were on the way so the lights were still on.
I opened the door and we quietly went in, Marion was in the hall and quietly came to meet us and hugged and kissed Anne.
Then Anne slipped off her coat and tiptoed along the hall.
Once she had reached the door to the lounge she took a breath and walked in.
“Hello baby girl” she said
Katy turned towards the voice and took a double take before she responded
“Annie? Is that really you?” and then she cried.
An Antidote To Writers Block (Part 67) Good Golly Miss Molly
Although Doreen was very upset at the time by her enforced incarceration in Kiddingstone, due to her failure to get back to her mother, she seemed to quickly come to terms with the situation as she took every ounce of satisfaction from me that night and twice again the next morning.
The second time of which occurred when I was in the shower and it began when she sat on the edge of the bath and took my cock in her mouth and sucked me up to full erection.
Then she stood up wearing a broad grin and leant back against the tiles and eased her small frame into the corner as droplets of water ran down her freckled skin to her pert breast and drip off her hard proud nipples.
Doreen lifted one foot up and planted it on the edge of the bath, and then the small delicate fingers of one hand combed their way through her wet pubes before descending between her hairy lips.
I watched intently and began tugging on my shaft in rhythm with her fingering until she suddenly stopped and opened her legs as far as she could, which I took as my signal to fuck her.
I slipped in between her greasy lips easily and my presence inside her was greeted with an appreciative moan.
With each thrust her buttocks slapped against the tiles but as I banged her on the short strokes her buttocks squeaked like new shoes until we both came in a juddering climax.
Afterwards I was shattered and my legs had completely gone, talk about a knee trembler.
I had to sit in the bath to recharge my batteries; I just sat there with the shower spraying down on me for about twenty minutes.
By the time I re-emerged from the bathroom, still dripping wet, Doreen was already fully dressed.
“You’ve recovered then” she said and laughed
“I’ll remember that the next time you’re gagging for it,” I said in response
“You’ll still shag me though” she said and walked over and kissed me.
I grabbed her and scooped her up in my arms
“Put me down you’ll get me all wet,” she protested
“That’s just how I like you” I teased her and then we kissed.
But that was all we did as I had to vacate the room and we both had trains to catch and I was so knackered I probably wouldn’t have been able to go again for at least 24 hours.
So I put her down she giggled as she sponged herself dry.
Then she sat down and watched me drying myself and by the lascivious look in her eye I couldn’t tell if she was remembering what she’d had or imagining what she was going to get the next time and there would be a next time.
Although physically I was a spent force, my mind was awash with erotic images of my time with Miss Clarke, or perhaps I should say the times with Miss Clarke.
So on the way to the station I called into the newsagents and picked up a reporters notebook so I could jot my filthy thoughts and reminiscences down on the journey home.
After all my philandering were the antidote to my writers block and as such were both my bread and butter and the icing on the cake.
Although we walked to the station together Doreen and I were getting separate trains as we lived in opposite directions and once we had bought our tickets we both went our separate ways with just a cheerio, we’d said a proper good bye back at the hotel.
Although the station was open and trains were running there was a greatly reduced service due to the previous day’s cancellations, which resulted in a rather lengthy wait on the platform.
I noticed Doreen didn’t have to wait long for her train and when she saw me she gave me a wave from her carriage.
I made good use of the time though and got some good outlines on paper, which I would flesh out later.
When the train did finally arrive I got on and consciously made an effort to keep jotting notes in my book because I knew after what Doreen had put me through the motion of the train would very quickly lull me off into a coma.
When I returned to the house Katy fussed around me like I’d been gone for a week, which was a bit over the top but it was nice to be missed.
It was one of the things you miss out on when you live alone, having someone to come home to.
Over the preceding week Katy had begun to spend ever so slightly more time in bed each day and less on her throne in the kitchen.
I had thought for a while that she looked visibly different each time I saw her, which I convinced myself was just my imagination but having not seen her for 24 hours I realised it was not.
Marion had made lunch and the three of us sat and ate it together in the kitchen.
While we sat at the table Marion said that while she was in England she really wanted to go shopping, but she didn’t really want to go alone.
However as Katy and I, for quite differing reasons, were unable in the former and unwilling in the latter to assist her, we set about finding a suitable companion.
After much deliberation between Katy and myself we decided the perfect choice would be Pandora or Judith or both so I phoned Pandora that afternoon and she was thrilled to be asked and said she would speak to Judith and set something up.
Low and behold not an hour later Judith knocked on the door and after introductions invited Marion round to hers for tea and a chat with her and Pandora, who would be arriving shortly.
So Marion grabbed her things while I cleared away form lunch, after which Katy said she need a rest so I carried her upstairs and settled her down,
“She’s definitely getting lighter,” I thought as I walked down the stairs.
I was feeling a little tired myself so I poured myself a glass of water and went to my study,
But despite being drained I couldn’t drop off,
Random thoughts kept me awake, all of them about my philandering ways,
Just as my eyes closed another example of my libidinous behaviour would flash into my mind.
I had tried to mend my ways after Georgia gave me an ultimatum about my womanising and I had made some little progress in that regard.
But it was true of late I had slipped back deeper into my old ways, but Georgia hadn’t mentioned my behaviour, or the ultimatum for ages and I wasn’t sure whether that was a good thing or not.
We skyped regularly and everything seemed to be ok.
I thought I would have to give her special attention when she came home at Easter.
“Definitely” I said aloud and promptly fell asleep.
I woke up just in time to see the nurse leave and hear Marion, who had returned from her afternoon tea appointment, fussing around her sister.
I walked into the kitchen and she had already got the evening meal well underway.
All the chat at dinner was about Marion’s new best friends; apparently they all got on famously.
I got on with them famously myself in fact Marion would have been shocked at just how famously I got on with them and the level of intimacy that existed between me and her new buddies.
Then I chastised myself for my childish behaviour and had to admit to myself I was a little jealous of having to share Katy.
I quickly snapped out of my silly mood and listened as
Marion said that she particularly wanted to go to Marks and Spencer, for knickers and stuff, but mainly she just wanted to shop at the British stores she didn’t get in Alaska.
Now Kiddingstone had quite a good shopping center and would probably have met most of Marion’s needs but Pandora and Judith volunteered to take her to one of the big out of town places and make a day of it. So they were going to be out all-day on Thursday.
The intervening days passed without incident and the green-eyed monster didn’t appear again.
On Thursday morning Pandora was knocking on the door even before the nurse had arrived and I watched as Marion and Pandy trotted off excitedly down the path to be met by an equally excited Judith at the end of it.
Almost the very moment Pandora’s Cherokee pulled away the district nurse arrived and another day was off and running.
It seemed like an age since Katy and I had spent the day together, just the two of us but after breakfast I asked her
“Do you wish you could have gone with the girls today?”
“Good grief no” she responded with a scoff “I hate shopping”
“Really?” I asked astonished that there was actually a female of the species who detested shopping
“Yes” she replied, “I buy everything on line”
Then she corrected herself
“Bought everything on line”
We spent a very pleasant day together and Katy managed to resist the urge to take an afternoon nap so she could beat me at crib again.
We had eaten supper and cleared away and were half way through “The Lady Vanishes” before Marion returned laden with bags and spent the next hour telling us all about her day.
And so enthusiastic was she in her description it was difficult not to be interested.
Bright and early on Friday morning when I opened the door it was to the familiar face of my cousin Molly.
“Hi Moll,” I said
“Hi cuz” she replied “and before you start, if you make any reference to “frumpy nurses” I’ll smash your face in”
“Grumpy nurse more like” I said, “I think you need to work on your bedside manner”
“My manner is exceptionally good at the bedside” she corrected me and gave me a kiss “as you well know”
After I had closed the door she asked
“I’m a bit early,” she said looking at her watch “is she up?”
“She’s in the bath” I replied, “come and have some coffee”
As we sat drinking our coffee I asked
“How come you’re here so early?
“I’ve come straight from the hospital” she replied “in fact do you mind if I hang around here for a bit, I’m on a split shift today and by the time I get home it’ll be time to head back again”
“Sure, no problem” I replied
As the morning went on I was beginning to regret my decision as Molly was excessively tactile, invading my personal space at every opportunity and she even kept rubbing up against me like an overly friendly puppy and she did everything to make her affections clear without actually shagging my leg.
Eventually I got fed up of her in constant touchy feely mode and following me everywhere, she was like sticky glue, but it was when she followed me into the utility that I snapped
“What is the matter with you Molly? Are you really on a split shift today or is just that you want me to split your whiskers?”
“I don’t have any whiskers” she replied all coy. “But…”
“But what?” I snapped again
“I’m so horny” she replied
“Well I can’t do anything about that at the moment” I said
“But I’m really horny” she pleaded
“Well you need to go and deal with it,” I told her
“I already did that, twice, and I’m still horny” Molly replied
“Well go and try again,” I said
“But it’s not MY finger that I need” she pleaded again
Just at that moment the washing machine reached the spin cycle
“Sit on that” I said and walked out
She must have taken my advice, as I didn’t see her for about half an hour.
When she did reappear I was sitting in the kitchen talking to Katy and Molly boosted herself up so she was sitting on the kitchen counter behind Katy.
Then she decided to up the stakes by playing the “Basic Instinct” gambit, sitting in my eye line “Sans Pants” and making quite sure I knew it as she kept flashing her hairless minge at me while I was trying to talk to Katy.
The problem was that the thought of her wanking herself really turned me on ever since she told me that when she hadn’t been rubbing up against me she was somewhere in the house rubbing herself.
I had a semi brewing and the thought of her sitting on the washing machine vibrating her pussy to a climax stirred me even more.
Molly was sitting flashing her fingered flange at me and I just wanted to fuck her there and then in fact I couldn’t have wanted her more if she’d started to wank herself off with Katy sitting there.
I tried to keep eye contact with Katy when she spoke but obviously my eyes kept wandering to from Katy’s eyes to Molly’s lips.
Thankfully before I exploded in my pants Marion came breezing into the kitchen and Molly’s leg snapped shut like a bear trap or perhaps more appropriately a clamshell.
Katy was reading an article from her magazine aloud, the name of which escaped me, as does the content of the story,
Luckily Marion’s arrival was also timely as it meant I didn’t have to show just how little attention I had been paying to Katy.
Any way we all had lunch together and I was trying to figure out how I was going to get into Molly.
I sat there all through lunch looking for a way I could manage to shag her.
We could have tried sneaking off to the study or my house of pleasure in the garage but the most likely outcome was going to be going out in the car for some contrived reason and park in the woods and shag in the car.
I couldn’t wait until lunch was over I was finding it difficult to interact; I have never been able to maintain a conversation and an erection at the same time.
As we were clearing away after lunch all my prayers were answered as Pandora was ringing to invite Marion to go over to Kiddingstone for the afternoon, there were apparently some things that Marion couldn’t get the day before.
So that was that, that was my in.
As soon as Katy settled down for the afternoon Molly would be able to get the rogering she’d been begging for all day.
When I was upstairs putting Katy to bed
“Are you ok?” Katy asked, “You seem a little distracted today”
“I’m fine I’m just a little tired is all” I lied “I didn’t sleep very well last night”
Well she had noticed my distraction but I didn’t know if she had picked up on what was bothering “little miss hot lips”
Katy was normally very perceptive, sharp as a knife, however the combination of her illness and the medication could quite easily dull the blade.
After I put Katy to bed I wandered downstairs and as I approached the kitchen I suddenly caught sight of Cousin Molly sitting on the kitchen counter completely naked fingering her hairless pussy.
The nagging semi I had been nursing for hours stemming from my earlier thoughts of Molly’s self abuse now turned into a full on boner.
Molly wasn’t fazed or embarrassed as I walked into the kitchen, nor did she stop what she was doing.
“What’s going on here then?” I said as I quickly undressed
She didn’t answer but then it was a rhetorical question.
I walked towards her and kissed her full on the mouth.
Molly was still fingering her wet crack and then with her free hand she reached out and grabbed my swollen cock
“I thought you couldn’t take care of my horniness today?” she said mimicking me, between kisses
“A window opened up” I replied “and I see that you have too”
“Shut up and fuck me” she purred and pulled my throbbing cock towards her moist pink pussy.
I hesitated, as I wanted to kneel before her shaven pussy and nosh on her juicy cunt.
But after all her delicious sexy self-abuse she didn’t have time for that.
“I need your cock,” she moaned
So I let her plug my cock into her hot cunny and with her legs hooked behind my arse and her arms locked around my neck I fucked her hard, which is what she wanted, a good hard fucking.
“Oh that’s it,” she moaned
She was so hot and she was so creamy being inside her was like being immersed in warm honey.
As I pumped into her she let out deep rasping moans
“Oh Cuz, Cuz” she panted
Then her breaths became coarser and her moans deeper
Her thighs were holding my hips like a vice and her ankles were crossed beneath my buttocks and holding me inside her.
I could only give her short measured strokes one after another and then another until
“Ohhhhhhhhh” and she came and my climax instantly followed
Then she kissed me
“God Simon I really needed that” she sighed still gripping me like a vice.
“Are you satisfied now?” I panted
“If I say no will you fuck me again?”
“Yes” I replied
“Then I’m nowhere near being satisfied” Molly said
“Then you’d better get your slutty arse into the study then nurse”
I ordered her and she ran down the hall naked and into the study as instructed.
I paused only to pick up all the clothes and then joined her.
The second time of which occurred when I was in the shower and it began when she sat on the edge of the bath and took my cock in her mouth and sucked me up to full erection.
Then she stood up wearing a broad grin and leant back against the tiles and eased her small frame into the corner as droplets of water ran down her freckled skin to her pert breast and drip off her hard proud nipples.
Doreen lifted one foot up and planted it on the edge of the bath, and then the small delicate fingers of one hand combed their way through her wet pubes before descending between her hairy lips.
I watched intently and began tugging on my shaft in rhythm with her fingering until she suddenly stopped and opened her legs as far as she could, which I took as my signal to fuck her.
I slipped in between her greasy lips easily and my presence inside her was greeted with an appreciative moan.
With each thrust her buttocks slapped against the tiles but as I banged her on the short strokes her buttocks squeaked like new shoes until we both came in a juddering climax.
Afterwards I was shattered and my legs had completely gone, talk about a knee trembler.
I had to sit in the bath to recharge my batteries; I just sat there with the shower spraying down on me for about twenty minutes.
By the time I re-emerged from the bathroom, still dripping wet, Doreen was already fully dressed.
“You’ve recovered then” she said and laughed
“I’ll remember that the next time you’re gagging for it,” I said in response
“You’ll still shag me though” she said and walked over and kissed me.
I grabbed her and scooped her up in my arms
“Put me down you’ll get me all wet,” she protested
“That’s just how I like you” I teased her and then we kissed.
But that was all we did as I had to vacate the room and we both had trains to catch and I was so knackered I probably wouldn’t have been able to go again for at least 24 hours.
So I put her down she giggled as she sponged herself dry.
Then she sat down and watched me drying myself and by the lascivious look in her eye I couldn’t tell if she was remembering what she’d had or imagining what she was going to get the next time and there would be a next time.
Although physically I was a spent force, my mind was awash with erotic images of my time with Miss Clarke, or perhaps I should say the times with Miss Clarke.
So on the way to the station I called into the newsagents and picked up a reporters notebook so I could jot my filthy thoughts and reminiscences down on the journey home.
After all my philandering were the antidote to my writers block and as such were both my bread and butter and the icing on the cake.
Although we walked to the station together Doreen and I were getting separate trains as we lived in opposite directions and once we had bought our tickets we both went our separate ways with just a cheerio, we’d said a proper good bye back at the hotel.
Although the station was open and trains were running there was a greatly reduced service due to the previous day’s cancellations, which resulted in a rather lengthy wait on the platform.
I noticed Doreen didn’t have to wait long for her train and when she saw me she gave me a wave from her carriage.
I made good use of the time though and got some good outlines on paper, which I would flesh out later.
When the train did finally arrive I got on and consciously made an effort to keep jotting notes in my book because I knew after what Doreen had put me through the motion of the train would very quickly lull me off into a coma.
When I returned to the house Katy fussed around me like I’d been gone for a week, which was a bit over the top but it was nice to be missed.
It was one of the things you miss out on when you live alone, having someone to come home to.
Over the preceding week Katy had begun to spend ever so slightly more time in bed each day and less on her throne in the kitchen.
I had thought for a while that she looked visibly different each time I saw her, which I convinced myself was just my imagination but having not seen her for 24 hours I realised it was not.
Marion had made lunch and the three of us sat and ate it together in the kitchen.
While we sat at the table Marion said that while she was in England she really wanted to go shopping, but she didn’t really want to go alone.
However as Katy and I, for quite differing reasons, were unable in the former and unwilling in the latter to assist her, we set about finding a suitable companion.
After much deliberation between Katy and myself we decided the perfect choice would be Pandora or Judith or both so I phoned Pandora that afternoon and she was thrilled to be asked and said she would speak to Judith and set something up.
Low and behold not an hour later Judith knocked on the door and after introductions invited Marion round to hers for tea and a chat with her and Pandora, who would be arriving shortly.
So Marion grabbed her things while I cleared away form lunch, after which Katy said she need a rest so I carried her upstairs and settled her down,
“She’s definitely getting lighter,” I thought as I walked down the stairs.
I was feeling a little tired myself so I poured myself a glass of water and went to my study,
But despite being drained I couldn’t drop off,
Random thoughts kept me awake, all of them about my philandering ways,
Just as my eyes closed another example of my libidinous behaviour would flash into my mind.
I had tried to mend my ways after Georgia gave me an ultimatum about my womanising and I had made some little progress in that regard.
But it was true of late I had slipped back deeper into my old ways, but Georgia hadn’t mentioned my behaviour, or the ultimatum for ages and I wasn’t sure whether that was a good thing or not.
We skyped regularly and everything seemed to be ok.
I thought I would have to give her special attention when she came home at Easter.
“Definitely” I said aloud and promptly fell asleep.
I woke up just in time to see the nurse leave and hear Marion, who had returned from her afternoon tea appointment, fussing around her sister.
I walked into the kitchen and she had already got the evening meal well underway.
All the chat at dinner was about Marion’s new best friends; apparently they all got on famously.
I got on with them famously myself in fact Marion would have been shocked at just how famously I got on with them and the level of intimacy that existed between me and her new buddies.
Then I chastised myself for my childish behaviour and had to admit to myself I was a little jealous of having to share Katy.
I quickly snapped out of my silly mood and listened as
Marion said that she particularly wanted to go to Marks and Spencer, for knickers and stuff, but mainly she just wanted to shop at the British stores she didn’t get in Alaska.
Now Kiddingstone had quite a good shopping center and would probably have met most of Marion’s needs but Pandora and Judith volunteered to take her to one of the big out of town places and make a day of it. So they were going to be out all-day on Thursday.
The intervening days passed without incident and the green-eyed monster didn’t appear again.
On Thursday morning Pandora was knocking on the door even before the nurse had arrived and I watched as Marion and Pandy trotted off excitedly down the path to be met by an equally excited Judith at the end of it.
Almost the very moment Pandora’s Cherokee pulled away the district nurse arrived and another day was off and running.
It seemed like an age since Katy and I had spent the day together, just the two of us but after breakfast I asked her
“Do you wish you could have gone with the girls today?”
“Good grief no” she responded with a scoff “I hate shopping”
“Really?” I asked astonished that there was actually a female of the species who detested shopping
“Yes” she replied, “I buy everything on line”
Then she corrected herself
“Bought everything on line”
We spent a very pleasant day together and Katy managed to resist the urge to take an afternoon nap so she could beat me at crib again.
We had eaten supper and cleared away and were half way through “The Lady Vanishes” before Marion returned laden with bags and spent the next hour telling us all about her day.
And so enthusiastic was she in her description it was difficult not to be interested.
Bright and early on Friday morning when I opened the door it was to the familiar face of my cousin Molly.
“Hi Moll,” I said
“Hi cuz” she replied “and before you start, if you make any reference to “frumpy nurses” I’ll smash your face in”
“Grumpy nurse more like” I said, “I think you need to work on your bedside manner”
“My manner is exceptionally good at the bedside” she corrected me and gave me a kiss “as you well know”
After I had closed the door she asked
“I’m a bit early,” she said looking at her watch “is she up?”
“She’s in the bath” I replied, “come and have some coffee”
As we sat drinking our coffee I asked
“How come you’re here so early?
“I’ve come straight from the hospital” she replied “in fact do you mind if I hang around here for a bit, I’m on a split shift today and by the time I get home it’ll be time to head back again”
“Sure, no problem” I replied
As the morning went on I was beginning to regret my decision as Molly was excessively tactile, invading my personal space at every opportunity and she even kept rubbing up against me like an overly friendly puppy and she did everything to make her affections clear without actually shagging my leg.
Eventually I got fed up of her in constant touchy feely mode and following me everywhere, she was like sticky glue, but it was when she followed me into the utility that I snapped
“What is the matter with you Molly? Are you really on a split shift today or is just that you want me to split your whiskers?”
“I don’t have any whiskers” she replied all coy. “But…”
“But what?” I snapped again
“I’m so horny” she replied
“Well I can’t do anything about that at the moment” I said
“But I’m really horny” she pleaded
“Well you need to go and deal with it,” I told her
“I already did that, twice, and I’m still horny” Molly replied
“Well go and try again,” I said
“But it’s not MY finger that I need” she pleaded again
Just at that moment the washing machine reached the spin cycle
“Sit on that” I said and walked out
She must have taken my advice, as I didn’t see her for about half an hour.
When she did reappear I was sitting in the kitchen talking to Katy and Molly boosted herself up so she was sitting on the kitchen counter behind Katy.
Then she decided to up the stakes by playing the “Basic Instinct” gambit, sitting in my eye line “Sans Pants” and making quite sure I knew it as she kept flashing her hairless minge at me while I was trying to talk to Katy.
The problem was that the thought of her wanking herself really turned me on ever since she told me that when she hadn’t been rubbing up against me she was somewhere in the house rubbing herself.
I had a semi brewing and the thought of her sitting on the washing machine vibrating her pussy to a climax stirred me even more.
Molly was sitting flashing her fingered flange at me and I just wanted to fuck her there and then in fact I couldn’t have wanted her more if she’d started to wank herself off with Katy sitting there.
I tried to keep eye contact with Katy when she spoke but obviously my eyes kept wandering to from Katy’s eyes to Molly’s lips.
Thankfully before I exploded in my pants Marion came breezing into the kitchen and Molly’s leg snapped shut like a bear trap or perhaps more appropriately a clamshell.
Katy was reading an article from her magazine aloud, the name of which escaped me, as does the content of the story,
Luckily Marion’s arrival was also timely as it meant I didn’t have to show just how little attention I had been paying to Katy.
Any way we all had lunch together and I was trying to figure out how I was going to get into Molly.
I sat there all through lunch looking for a way I could manage to shag her.
We could have tried sneaking off to the study or my house of pleasure in the garage but the most likely outcome was going to be going out in the car for some contrived reason and park in the woods and shag in the car.
I couldn’t wait until lunch was over I was finding it difficult to interact; I have never been able to maintain a conversation and an erection at the same time.
As we were clearing away after lunch all my prayers were answered as Pandora was ringing to invite Marion to go over to Kiddingstone for the afternoon, there were apparently some things that Marion couldn’t get the day before.
So that was that, that was my in.
As soon as Katy settled down for the afternoon Molly would be able to get the rogering she’d been begging for all day.
When I was upstairs putting Katy to bed
“Are you ok?” Katy asked, “You seem a little distracted today”
“I’m fine I’m just a little tired is all” I lied “I didn’t sleep very well last night”
Well she had noticed my distraction but I didn’t know if she had picked up on what was bothering “little miss hot lips”
Katy was normally very perceptive, sharp as a knife, however the combination of her illness and the medication could quite easily dull the blade.
After I put Katy to bed I wandered downstairs and as I approached the kitchen I suddenly caught sight of Cousin Molly sitting on the kitchen counter completely naked fingering her hairless pussy.
The nagging semi I had been nursing for hours stemming from my earlier thoughts of Molly’s self abuse now turned into a full on boner.
Molly wasn’t fazed or embarrassed as I walked into the kitchen, nor did she stop what she was doing.
“What’s going on here then?” I said as I quickly undressed
She didn’t answer but then it was a rhetorical question.
I walked towards her and kissed her full on the mouth.
Molly was still fingering her wet crack and then with her free hand she reached out and grabbed my swollen cock
“I thought you couldn’t take care of my horniness today?” she said mimicking me, between kisses
“A window opened up” I replied “and I see that you have too”
“Shut up and fuck me” she purred and pulled my throbbing cock towards her moist pink pussy.
I hesitated, as I wanted to kneel before her shaven pussy and nosh on her juicy cunt.
But after all her delicious sexy self-abuse she didn’t have time for that.
“I need your cock,” she moaned
So I let her plug my cock into her hot cunny and with her legs hooked behind my arse and her arms locked around my neck I fucked her hard, which is what she wanted, a good hard fucking.
“Oh that’s it,” she moaned
She was so hot and she was so creamy being inside her was like being immersed in warm honey.
As I pumped into her she let out deep rasping moans
“Oh Cuz, Cuz” she panted
Then her breaths became coarser and her moans deeper
Her thighs were holding my hips like a vice and her ankles were crossed beneath my buttocks and holding me inside her.
I could only give her short measured strokes one after another and then another until
“Ohhhhhhhhh” and she came and my climax instantly followed
Then she kissed me
“God Simon I really needed that” she sighed still gripping me like a vice.
“Are you satisfied now?” I panted
“If I say no will you fuck me again?”
“Yes” I replied
“Then I’m nowhere near being satisfied” Molly said
“Then you’d better get your slutty arse into the study then nurse”
I ordered her and she ran down the hall naked and into the study as instructed.
I paused only to pick up all the clothes and then joined her.
An Antidote To Writers Block (Part 66) St Patrick’s Day
In the early hours of Mothering Sunday morning I was violently shaken awake.
“You have to go,” Pandora said
“What? when?” I said
“In about an hour” she replied as she laced her fingers around my shaft.
“Now this is the kind of early morning call I like,” I said as she tugged on my cock and tongued my ear
Then in a trice Pandora was above me and she was rubbing her sticky lips against my helmet provocatively before she slowly slid down on me.
And then like a whirlwind Pandora pumped her pussy on me again and again thrashing about like a whirling dervish her tits bouncing wildly with each thrust.
And each one was followed by a grunt
“Huh”
Thrust
“Huh”
Thrust
“Huh”
One after another as she satisfied her self on my rod, all I could do was grab her arse and be mesmerised by her jiggling jugs.
Then her pumping action quickened
“Huh”
“Huh”
“Huh”
Until she came in a rousing crescendo
“HUH”
And my pulsing cock shot into her hot cunny. Then Pandora, panting hard collapsed on top of me, and let out a low sigh of contentment
“Mmmmm”
“Another one for the bank?” I asked
“Ohhh yes” she said smugly
Pandora had woken me early in the morning so I could sneak out before the neighbours were up and about; but she decided to wake me extra early so we could have a shag before I left.
So on that dark Sunday morning in March after a lingering goodbye kiss I walked home across the golf course.
When I got back home, the house was in darkness so I wandered off to the study and crawled onto the sofa bed and went out like a light.
However I didn’t sleep for long as I was woken by the district nurse at 7.45.
After she had left I took Katy a cup of tea and she said I should go back to bed as Marion was going to get her up for the day.
But annoyingly I couldn’t go back to sleep so I got up again.
After showering and dressing for the day I thought that as we had guests and as I was up so early anyway I would set about preparing a roast dinner.
As we had company I served dinner in the dining room, a rare treat as I had only used that room on a handful of occasions since I’d lived in the house and as a matter of fact it was the only room I hadn’t had sex in.
That would have to be remedied.
Along with the roast pork I even made Yorkshire puddings, which I normally have great success with but on this occasion, much to my embarrassment and Katy’s amusement, they came out more like Yorkshire biscuits.
Later when the nurse came and asked her what she had eaten that day she delighted in stating “Roast Pork and Yorkshire biscuits”
And then fell about laughing.
It was lovely to see her in such high spirits’ even if the joke was at my expense it was well worth it.
It turned out to be beautiful spring afternoon so after lunch Katy sat on the patio while I cleared away the lunch things and Bob and Marion went out to explore the village.
When I put away the last of the dishes I made a drink and went out to join Katy on the patio.
As I put her mug on the table she took hold of my hand and said
“I know I’ve said it a lot but, thank you Simon, You’ve made me so happy”
“It was worth it just to see your face” I said and kissed her forehead.
As I sat down I added
“We just have to find the other one to complete the coven”
“You are so cheeky” she said and laughed
The warm spring interlude continued for the next few days but as the week went on it proved to be a false dawn and the cold weather returned and before the following weekend was out so did the snow.
With Marion and Bob in the house and the routine with the nurses running like clockwork I found myself with a bit of time on my hands.
My first thought was an away day with Claire but she was away at a conference all week so no joy there.
So after speaking to the girls and making sure they were comfortable with it I decided to pay some attention to my day job, namely my writing.
First of all I waded through the emails that had accumulated.
Most of them were of no importance so they went into the bin, the rest comprised of a number from Gay Gordon, gently reminding me that I hadn’t submitted anything lately.
Luckily before Katy moved in I managed to get ahead of the curve and I held some in reserve for just such a time, so I fired some off to him, which I hoped, would keep him quiet for a week or two at least.
The other emails of importance were both in reference to the same thing, i.e. Gerald Overend’s stories.
There was a publisher pressing me for a date when the written stories would be available and one from the company that showed an interest in the sound recordings, there were of course emails from my agent in regard to both of the a fore mentioned messages.
I emailed the publisher and Lionel and told them the written stories would be available by the end of the week, as it turned out I got them there a day early.
Luckily most of the work was done so I just had to spend the next day and a half completing them and then I couriered the first drafts to the publishers.
The sound recordings I couldn’t do anything about until I had spoken with Tilly so I phoned Sound Bites on Tuesday morning and asked to speak with her.
I was informed by Gloria, the unhelpful receptionist, that she was not available, I was about to leave a message for her to call me but instead I asked
“Is Tristan available?”
It turned out that he was as his was the next voice I heard
“Tristan speaking”
“Hi Tris, its Simon” I said
“Hi Simon how are things?” he asked
“Not bad” I replied “Listen I’m trying to get hold of Tilly”
“She flew to the states this morning” he told me
“Damn” I cursed
“Anything I can help with?” I asked
“Well it’s about the tapes” I said, “I’m getting chased for them”
“Well I’m pretty sure they’re finished,” he said doubtfully “but I’ll get her to call you”
And we left it at that.
It was Thursday before she returned my call.
“Simon” she said brightly “Sorry it’s taken so long to get back to you, but the time difference really mess’s with my head”
“That’s ok” I lied
“Anyway all the recording are complete, so we should meet to see where we go from here”
“Ok great” I said “when”?
“Well I get back in late Friday which means on Saturday I’m going to be a cabbage so how about Sunday” she suggested “Lunch maybe, you me and Tristan”
“Ok great” I replied “Get Tris to ring me with the details”
Marion was going to stay in the UK for a couple more weeks at least but on Friday Bob flew back to the states; I borrowed Geoff’s Passat and drove them to the airport while Judith looked after Katy.
It was a bitterly cold day but compared to Alaska Bob and Marion thought it was quite pleasant.
I dropped Bob at departures and sat in the car with the engine running while they said their goodbyes and we got back to the village mid afternoon.
On Sunday I left Marion looking after her sister and walked towards the station, it had just started to snow, and I was late leaving.
But although I was running behind my time I decided to call in at Mahajak’s on the way, just to see how Shula was coping after the death of her husband and as I walked into the shop I could distinctly hear giggling coming from behind the bead curtain at the back of the shop.
I was met by a smiling Maisie who said
“That’s loves young dream”
“Ah” I exclaimed “no need to ask if she’s bearing up then”
“She doing just find” she answered and gave me a wink
“I’ll go and catch my train then” I said, “see you later hon”
“Bye Simon” she replied still smiling
Well that was a relief, I was worried I had neglected her since Omid died but Alois had obviously taken my advice about being a shoulder to cry on, he had obviously extended that to be a lap for her to straddle as well
“Excellent” I said to myself as I approached the station.
I had planned to meet up with Tristan and Tilly in Kiddlingstone at a restaurant called “The Pigs Trotter” at half past twelve, I had left my house five minutes later than I intended but for some unknown reason I arrived in Kiddingstone half an hour early.
I stood outside the station staring at my watch and scratching my head trying to figure out where I had gone wrong.
It was snowing hard and I was feeling the cold so I decide to have a beer at the nearest watering hole, which happened to be “Old Bell Inn” known affectionately by the locals as the “Old Bell End”.
As it was St Patrick’s Day the pub was bedecked in Green bunting and the Irish flag was draped everywhere,
It wasn’t a proper Irish pub despite the décor, the Guinness on tap and the Irish music.
I ordered a Guinness and sat at the nearest table and smiled at the tableaux before me.
The music was good, the only problem was they were playing a mixture of Irish rebel songs and Orangemen marching tunes luckily there was no one in the pub Irish enough to be offended.
It was just a bunch of piss heads taking advantage of two for ones, any excuse to get pissed on cheap booze.
I was halfway down my pint when I spotted a familiar face.
She had long straight brown hair and a rather plain, heavily freckled face, but lovely blue eyes, a cute nose and a thin-lipped smile.
She was short with a nice little figure, decked out for the occasion. The shabby tights that she was wearing the last time we met had been replaced by a rather more superior quality product in green which encased her shapely legs.
She also had on a flared green dress and a green hat. In fact the only things she was wearing that weren’t green were her tiny black shoes.
I watched her move from table to table collecting empties and putting them on the bar.
She was an altogether more confident lass that the shy little mouse I met on the Guildford train who, slightly the worse for drink entertained me by displaying the full majesty of her hairy Minge before her tiny hand and nimble fingers began frigging at her fanny before my eyes.
I got a distinct boner as I recalled that remarkable journey.
I had to take over when she faltered and finished her off and creamed my jeans at the same time.
I continued to appraise her as my cock bulged in my pants but I couldn’t get up and walk to the bar and speak to her due to the obvious swelling, so I called out.
“Doreen? Doreen Clarke?”
“Yes” she answered as she turned towards me, and as recognition dawned on her face she went crimson red
“Simon” she said and walked over towards me.
“Hello” I said
“Hi Simon” she responded still blushing
“You never did phone me” I remarked
“I didn’t know what to say,” she said in her coy mousy voice.
“”Hi Simon. Doreen would like to play” would have sufficed” I said
“Ok” she replied, “I’ve still got your number”
“Good” I said then I looked at my watch “oh God! I have to go”
I drained my glass and stood up; luckily the shock of now being late again instantly cooled my ardour so I could stand with no embarrassment and towered over her diminutive figure.
“I might be back later,” I said
“I finish at seven” Doreen replied
“If I miss you call me” I instructed
“Ok I will” she replied
I reached “The Pigs Trotter” at half past twelve on the dot only to find the other two were late, they sauntered in fifteen minutes later.
“Sorry we’re late” Tristan said, “my fault I’m afraid, my train was delayed”
It was a fruitful meeting and an exceptionally nice meal.
We determined a plan of action, as I couldn’t dedicate the necessary time to the project because of Katy, I gave them carte blanche to deal directly with the distributer and they would keep Lionel in the loop as well.
When we left the restaurant we went back to Tillys place and spent a relaxing afternoon.
About six o’clock I decided to make a move, Tristan decided he couldn’t be bothered so was going to spend the night at Tilly’s but I wanted to get back so I said my goodbyes and headed to the station.
It was snowing heavily and when I reached the station I found that no trains were running, I tried the taxi rank but there were no cabs to be found.
I was about to go back to Tilly’s when I remembered Doreen and walked to the “Old Bell Inn” instead.
I went to the reception and managed to secure their last vacant room.
It was a few minutes after seven when I was handed the key for room six and as the rather gruff receptionist returned to the bar a small figure wrapped up against the cold, came through the door from the noisy lounge bar and stopped dead when they caught sight of me.
“Simon” she said, her voice muffled by her scarf.
“Is that Doreen under all that?” I asked
She didn’t speak she just nodded.
“Where are you off to?” I queried
“I’ve got to get home,” she said
“There aren’t any trains,” I told her
“What? To Guildford?” she asked urgently
“To anywhere” I replied
“And there are no taxis either”
“Oh shit,” Doreen exclaimed
“I have to try” she said, “I’d like to stay, but I have to try”
“Ok hon” I said “I’m in 6 if you change your mind”
And she disappeared out into the snowy night,
Resigned to the fact I wasn’t going to get my end away I went into the bar and ordered a pint of Guinness but it was all a bit loud and raucous so I took it up to my room.
At first glance it was a bit small and dingy but on reflection I had been a bit spoilt with some of the hotels I had frequented with Claire and Pandora so I chastised myself for being such a snob.
I sat on the bed and phoned home to tell Katy and Marion I was snowed in, in Kiddingstone.
Katy said she suspected as much as the nurse was having to stay at the house, as she couldn’t get out of the village.
That put my mind at rest so I said goodnight and promised to be back as soon as possible the next day.
When I hung up I sat on the bed and switched on the TV and watched the end of one of the Rocky movies, I’m not sure which, as I drank my beer.
After about an hour I was convinced Doreen had some how found a route home.
So I went into the bathroom and had a pee then as it was cold in the room I decided to get undressed and get into bed almost in time for the next film to start, this time it was one of the Jaws franchise, again not sure which, it had a big fish in it and involved a lot of splashing about.
Anyway I only lasted about ten minutes and the long blinks set in which quickly led to sleep.
I was woken from my slumber by a persistent tapping on the door.
I looked at my watch and only twenty minutes had elapsed since I drifted off.
I got out of bed and was just about to open the door when I remembered I was naked so I quickly grabbed a towel from the bathroom and wrapped it around me sarong style.
I opened the door and found the source of the tapping was Doreen, still wrapped up against the weather with melting snow on her shoulders.
Only her eyes and nose were visible between her woollen hat and matching scarf, and her eyes bore the evidence of crying.
“Come in Honey” I said and the moment the door closed she buried her cold face in my naked chest and began to cry.
“I”
“Cant”
“Get”
“Home” she said between sobs
Inside my head I said
“Well I did tell you that”
But saying it out loud would not have helped the situation so I just thought it and made sympathetic noises instead.
“All the trains are cancelled,” she said
“I know,” I thought
“And I couldn’t find a cab”
“I told you that as well,” I thought
“A friend offered to drive me but we only got about a mile or so and then the road was closed, so we came back”
After a few moments I asked
“What’s at home that you are so desperate to get home for?”
I was certain it wasn’t a significant other, that wouldn’t fit with her performance on the train and again in the disabled toilet at Guildford station.
“My mum” she answered
“For god’s sake” I thought “you’re in your mid twenties, you’re a big girl now”
Out loud I just said
“Oh?”
“She has dementia, and I’m her carer”
Well did I feel bad when I heard that.
“I had to try and get home” Doreen said “but when I couldn’t I had to phone around and find someone to check on her”
“And did you?” I asked sympathetically
“Yes” she said with relief “one of the neighbours offered to stay with her overnight”
Then we just stood in the room for, I don’t know how long, her dressed in her outdoor clothes and me in a towel.
Until the pattern of her breathing changed and I felt the feather light kisses from her soft lips on my chest which prompted the tell tale tingle beneath my towel.
Her lips journeyed up my chest until they reached mine and she kissed me, a long deep liquid kiss with darting tongues, a quite electric kiss with just the right amount of urgency.
I was just contemplating getting inside her outdoor apparel when she broke away and jerked the towel off me
She stood back giving me an appraising look and bit her lip as she stared at my erection.
She flicked her eyes up and made the briefest contact with mine enough to cause her to blush but not enough to prevent her from returning her gaze to my swollen cock.
I sat down on the bed and Doreen removed her outdoor clothes.
She sat on a chair and removed her boots before returning to the middle of the room.
“Well don’t stop there,” I said
“No you have to do it” she replied
I stood up and stepped towards her, her gaze still fixed unashamedly on my cock.
We kissed again but this time her small hands busied themselves caressing my naked flesh.
Meanwhile I used one hand and unzipped the back of her dress while the other one was on her shoulder and instantly pulled the sleeve of her dress down her arm, Doreen obligingly slipped her arm out, and as the fabric fell away I was able to see her small breast encased behind pale green lace.
I repeated the operation with the other sleeve and the dress fell away to the floor and Doreen used her tiny feet to kick it away.
I glanced in the mirror and could see the reflection of her rear aspect as she stood there in just her underclothes and tights.
She had a tidy little figure and a gorgeous little arse, which I quickly fondled.
Then my hands proceed upwards and unhooked her bra. I didn’t wait to discard the garment first I just moved my hand straight to the prize and cupped her tit she sighed and snorted air in deeply through her nose as I toyed with her stiffening nipple.
Our mouths disengaged briefly and she took the opportunity to wriggle free from her harness.
Still fondling her breast we kissed again. But my cock was throbbing and there was a tell tale ache in my balls so reluctantly I released her pert tittie and instead slid my hands down inside her tights and knickers to fondle the flesh of her plump cheeks.
It took little effort to roll her tights down her buttocks to the top of her thighs.
I picked her up and in one fluid motion turned and threw her onto the bed, she gave a little scream as she landed on the bed followed by a fruity chuckle when I grabbed her ankle and began peeling her tights from her legs.
When she was naked I gave her a thorough appraisal, every inch of her small freckled frame with the pert tits and stiffened nipples and a flat stomach leading to her gloriously hairy brunette bush.
I dropped to my knees and began kissing my way up her thigh to that magnificent minge.
As enjoyable as our shag at Guildford station had been last year she didn’t have the time for me to do her full justice, and noshing her was not an option,
At the “Old Bell Inn” on St Patricks Day however I had all the time in the world.
As I proceeded upward along her thigh I could smell her pungent odour, a wonderful mix of femininity, arousal and twelve hours since it was last showered, this heady fragrance spurred me on, I looked up briefly and saw Doreen laying there with eyes closed biting her lip and as she opened up wide for me I buried my face in her moist minge.
Once I had satisfied both Doreen and my animal appetite.
I began kissing my way up her body, her primeval fragrance all around my mouth, I stopped when I reached her breasts and sucked on her teats while I fingered her hot pussy with two fingers, Doreen moaned deliciously as I frigged her and barked like a seal as she came.
I raised my head from my task to revel in her extraordinary exclamation.
Leaving her misshapen nipples wet with my saliva. I put my hand behind her neck and lifted her head up towards me so I could kiss her.
Despite my face still being wet with her pungent juices she responded urgently to my kiss, her tongue darting energetically in and out of my mouth.
Taking her by surprise I pushed her onto her back again and she looked up at me wickedly.
I was still kneeling on the floor and with her lying stretched out before be with one hand grasping a handful of duvet and the other playing with her swollen nipple.
She spread her legs wide and her juicy quim was at the perfect height to receive me.
She sucked in air through her teeth as I penetrated her and her skinny legs wrapped around me.
“Ahhhhh” she exclaimed when I was all the way in.
Doreen wriggled like a fish on the riverbank as I repeatedly skewered her tight juicy fanny and it was wetting my bally more and more with every stroke.
She came three times in quick succession making the same delicious sound, like a mother panting through a contraction.
“Shhh”
“Shhh”
“Shhh
Followed by a more expressive
“Ohhhhh”
I knew I couldn’t hold off much longer as I pumped her pussy I was very close to that ecstatic moment of conclusion
Doreen’s next big orgasm would be the finale for us both.
I had a great rhythm going and her skinny legs were still gripping me hard.
And as the strokes shortened her exclamations changed to soft rhythmic pants
“Ooh”
“Ooh”
Until we reached that perfect point of climax when we both came together and she screamed at the top of her lungs.
“Ahhhhhh”
As I emptied my sac into her grateful gash.
When I pulled out of her quivering quim she let out a long soft sigh of satisfaction.
“You have to go,” Pandora said
“What? when?” I said
“In about an hour” she replied as she laced her fingers around my shaft.
“Now this is the kind of early morning call I like,” I said as she tugged on my cock and tongued my ear
Then in a trice Pandora was above me and she was rubbing her sticky lips against my helmet provocatively before she slowly slid down on me.
And then like a whirlwind Pandora pumped her pussy on me again and again thrashing about like a whirling dervish her tits bouncing wildly with each thrust.
And each one was followed by a grunt
“Huh”
Thrust
“Huh”
Thrust
“Huh”
One after another as she satisfied her self on my rod, all I could do was grab her arse and be mesmerised by her jiggling jugs.
Then her pumping action quickened
“Huh”
“Huh”
“Huh”
Until she came in a rousing crescendo
“HUH”
And my pulsing cock shot into her hot cunny. Then Pandora, panting hard collapsed on top of me, and let out a low sigh of contentment
“Mmmmm”
“Another one for the bank?” I asked
“Ohhh yes” she said smugly
Pandora had woken me early in the morning so I could sneak out before the neighbours were up and about; but she decided to wake me extra early so we could have a shag before I left.
So on that dark Sunday morning in March after a lingering goodbye kiss I walked home across the golf course.
When I got back home, the house was in darkness so I wandered off to the study and crawled onto the sofa bed and went out like a light.
However I didn’t sleep for long as I was woken by the district nurse at 7.45.
After she had left I took Katy a cup of tea and she said I should go back to bed as Marion was going to get her up for the day.
But annoyingly I couldn’t go back to sleep so I got up again.
After showering and dressing for the day I thought that as we had guests and as I was up so early anyway I would set about preparing a roast dinner.
As we had company I served dinner in the dining room, a rare treat as I had only used that room on a handful of occasions since I’d lived in the house and as a matter of fact it was the only room I hadn’t had sex in.
That would have to be remedied.
Along with the roast pork I even made Yorkshire puddings, which I normally have great success with but on this occasion, much to my embarrassment and Katy’s amusement, they came out more like Yorkshire biscuits.
Later when the nurse came and asked her what she had eaten that day she delighted in stating “Roast Pork and Yorkshire biscuits”
And then fell about laughing.
It was lovely to see her in such high spirits’ even if the joke was at my expense it was well worth it.
It turned out to be beautiful spring afternoon so after lunch Katy sat on the patio while I cleared away the lunch things and Bob and Marion went out to explore the village.
When I put away the last of the dishes I made a drink and went out to join Katy on the patio.
As I put her mug on the table she took hold of my hand and said
“I know I’ve said it a lot but, thank you Simon, You’ve made me so happy”
“It was worth it just to see your face” I said and kissed her forehead.
As I sat down I added
“We just have to find the other one to complete the coven”
“You are so cheeky” she said and laughed
The warm spring interlude continued for the next few days but as the week went on it proved to be a false dawn and the cold weather returned and before the following weekend was out so did the snow.
With Marion and Bob in the house and the routine with the nurses running like clockwork I found myself with a bit of time on my hands.
My first thought was an away day with Claire but she was away at a conference all week so no joy there.
So after speaking to the girls and making sure they were comfortable with it I decided to pay some attention to my day job, namely my writing.
First of all I waded through the emails that had accumulated.
Most of them were of no importance so they went into the bin, the rest comprised of a number from Gay Gordon, gently reminding me that I hadn’t submitted anything lately.
Luckily before Katy moved in I managed to get ahead of the curve and I held some in reserve for just such a time, so I fired some off to him, which I hoped, would keep him quiet for a week or two at least.
The other emails of importance were both in reference to the same thing, i.e. Gerald Overend’s stories.
There was a publisher pressing me for a date when the written stories would be available and one from the company that showed an interest in the sound recordings, there were of course emails from my agent in regard to both of the a fore mentioned messages.
I emailed the publisher and Lionel and told them the written stories would be available by the end of the week, as it turned out I got them there a day early.
Luckily most of the work was done so I just had to spend the next day and a half completing them and then I couriered the first drafts to the publishers.
The sound recordings I couldn’t do anything about until I had spoken with Tilly so I phoned Sound Bites on Tuesday morning and asked to speak with her.
I was informed by Gloria, the unhelpful receptionist, that she was not available, I was about to leave a message for her to call me but instead I asked
“Is Tristan available?”
It turned out that he was as his was the next voice I heard
“Tristan speaking”
“Hi Tris, its Simon” I said
“Hi Simon how are things?” he asked
“Not bad” I replied “Listen I’m trying to get hold of Tilly”
“She flew to the states this morning” he told me
“Damn” I cursed
“Anything I can help with?” I asked
“Well it’s about the tapes” I said, “I’m getting chased for them”
“Well I’m pretty sure they’re finished,” he said doubtfully “but I’ll get her to call you”
And we left it at that.
It was Thursday before she returned my call.
“Simon” she said brightly “Sorry it’s taken so long to get back to you, but the time difference really mess’s with my head”
“That’s ok” I lied
“Anyway all the recording are complete, so we should meet to see where we go from here”
“Ok great” I said “when”?
“Well I get back in late Friday which means on Saturday I’m going to be a cabbage so how about Sunday” she suggested “Lunch maybe, you me and Tristan”
“Ok great” I replied “Get Tris to ring me with the details”
Marion was going to stay in the UK for a couple more weeks at least but on Friday Bob flew back to the states; I borrowed Geoff’s Passat and drove them to the airport while Judith looked after Katy.
It was a bitterly cold day but compared to Alaska Bob and Marion thought it was quite pleasant.
I dropped Bob at departures and sat in the car with the engine running while they said their goodbyes and we got back to the village mid afternoon.
On Sunday I left Marion looking after her sister and walked towards the station, it had just started to snow, and I was late leaving.
But although I was running behind my time I decided to call in at Mahajak’s on the way, just to see how Shula was coping after the death of her husband and as I walked into the shop I could distinctly hear giggling coming from behind the bead curtain at the back of the shop.
I was met by a smiling Maisie who said
“That’s loves young dream”
“Ah” I exclaimed “no need to ask if she’s bearing up then”
“She doing just find” she answered and gave me a wink
“I’ll go and catch my train then” I said, “see you later hon”
“Bye Simon” she replied still smiling
Well that was a relief, I was worried I had neglected her since Omid died but Alois had obviously taken my advice about being a shoulder to cry on, he had obviously extended that to be a lap for her to straddle as well
“Excellent” I said to myself as I approached the station.
I had planned to meet up with Tristan and Tilly in Kiddlingstone at a restaurant called “The Pigs Trotter” at half past twelve, I had left my house five minutes later than I intended but for some unknown reason I arrived in Kiddingstone half an hour early.
I stood outside the station staring at my watch and scratching my head trying to figure out where I had gone wrong.
It was snowing hard and I was feeling the cold so I decide to have a beer at the nearest watering hole, which happened to be “Old Bell Inn” known affectionately by the locals as the “Old Bell End”.
As it was St Patrick’s Day the pub was bedecked in Green bunting and the Irish flag was draped everywhere,
It wasn’t a proper Irish pub despite the décor, the Guinness on tap and the Irish music.
I ordered a Guinness and sat at the nearest table and smiled at the tableaux before me.
The music was good, the only problem was they were playing a mixture of Irish rebel songs and Orangemen marching tunes luckily there was no one in the pub Irish enough to be offended.
It was just a bunch of piss heads taking advantage of two for ones, any excuse to get pissed on cheap booze.
I was halfway down my pint when I spotted a familiar face.
She had long straight brown hair and a rather plain, heavily freckled face, but lovely blue eyes, a cute nose and a thin-lipped smile.
She was short with a nice little figure, decked out for the occasion. The shabby tights that she was wearing the last time we met had been replaced by a rather more superior quality product in green which encased her shapely legs.
She also had on a flared green dress and a green hat. In fact the only things she was wearing that weren’t green were her tiny black shoes.
I watched her move from table to table collecting empties and putting them on the bar.
She was an altogether more confident lass that the shy little mouse I met on the Guildford train who, slightly the worse for drink entertained me by displaying the full majesty of her hairy Minge before her tiny hand and nimble fingers began frigging at her fanny before my eyes.
I got a distinct boner as I recalled that remarkable journey.
I had to take over when she faltered and finished her off and creamed my jeans at the same time.
I continued to appraise her as my cock bulged in my pants but I couldn’t get up and walk to the bar and speak to her due to the obvious swelling, so I called out.
“Doreen? Doreen Clarke?”
“Yes” she answered as she turned towards me, and as recognition dawned on her face she went crimson red
“Simon” she said and walked over towards me.
“Hello” I said
“Hi Simon” she responded still blushing
“You never did phone me” I remarked
“I didn’t know what to say,” she said in her coy mousy voice.
“”Hi Simon. Doreen would like to play” would have sufficed” I said
“Ok” she replied, “I’ve still got your number”
“Good” I said then I looked at my watch “oh God! I have to go”
I drained my glass and stood up; luckily the shock of now being late again instantly cooled my ardour so I could stand with no embarrassment and towered over her diminutive figure.
“I might be back later,” I said
“I finish at seven” Doreen replied
“If I miss you call me” I instructed
“Ok I will” she replied
I reached “The Pigs Trotter” at half past twelve on the dot only to find the other two were late, they sauntered in fifteen minutes later.
“Sorry we’re late” Tristan said, “my fault I’m afraid, my train was delayed”
It was a fruitful meeting and an exceptionally nice meal.
We determined a plan of action, as I couldn’t dedicate the necessary time to the project because of Katy, I gave them carte blanche to deal directly with the distributer and they would keep Lionel in the loop as well.
When we left the restaurant we went back to Tillys place and spent a relaxing afternoon.
About six o’clock I decided to make a move, Tristan decided he couldn’t be bothered so was going to spend the night at Tilly’s but I wanted to get back so I said my goodbyes and headed to the station.
It was snowing heavily and when I reached the station I found that no trains were running, I tried the taxi rank but there were no cabs to be found.
I was about to go back to Tilly’s when I remembered Doreen and walked to the “Old Bell Inn” instead.
I went to the reception and managed to secure their last vacant room.
It was a few minutes after seven when I was handed the key for room six and as the rather gruff receptionist returned to the bar a small figure wrapped up against the cold, came through the door from the noisy lounge bar and stopped dead when they caught sight of me.
“Simon” she said, her voice muffled by her scarf.
“Is that Doreen under all that?” I asked
She didn’t speak she just nodded.
“Where are you off to?” I queried
“I’ve got to get home,” she said
“There aren’t any trains,” I told her
“What? To Guildford?” she asked urgently
“To anywhere” I replied
“And there are no taxis either”
“Oh shit,” Doreen exclaimed
“I have to try” she said, “I’d like to stay, but I have to try”
“Ok hon” I said “I’m in 6 if you change your mind”
And she disappeared out into the snowy night,
Resigned to the fact I wasn’t going to get my end away I went into the bar and ordered a pint of Guinness but it was all a bit loud and raucous so I took it up to my room.
At first glance it was a bit small and dingy but on reflection I had been a bit spoilt with some of the hotels I had frequented with Claire and Pandora so I chastised myself for being such a snob.
I sat on the bed and phoned home to tell Katy and Marion I was snowed in, in Kiddingstone.
Katy said she suspected as much as the nurse was having to stay at the house, as she couldn’t get out of the village.
That put my mind at rest so I said goodnight and promised to be back as soon as possible the next day.
When I hung up I sat on the bed and switched on the TV and watched the end of one of the Rocky movies, I’m not sure which, as I drank my beer.
After about an hour I was convinced Doreen had some how found a route home.
So I went into the bathroom and had a pee then as it was cold in the room I decided to get undressed and get into bed almost in time for the next film to start, this time it was one of the Jaws franchise, again not sure which, it had a big fish in it and involved a lot of splashing about.
Anyway I only lasted about ten minutes and the long blinks set in which quickly led to sleep.
I was woken from my slumber by a persistent tapping on the door.
I looked at my watch and only twenty minutes had elapsed since I drifted off.
I got out of bed and was just about to open the door when I remembered I was naked so I quickly grabbed a towel from the bathroom and wrapped it around me sarong style.
I opened the door and found the source of the tapping was Doreen, still wrapped up against the weather with melting snow on her shoulders.
Only her eyes and nose were visible between her woollen hat and matching scarf, and her eyes bore the evidence of crying.
“Come in Honey” I said and the moment the door closed she buried her cold face in my naked chest and began to cry.
“I”
“Cant”
“Get”
“Home” she said between sobs
Inside my head I said
“Well I did tell you that”
But saying it out loud would not have helped the situation so I just thought it and made sympathetic noises instead.
“All the trains are cancelled,” she said
“I know,” I thought
“And I couldn’t find a cab”
“I told you that as well,” I thought
“A friend offered to drive me but we only got about a mile or so and then the road was closed, so we came back”
After a few moments I asked
“What’s at home that you are so desperate to get home for?”
I was certain it wasn’t a significant other, that wouldn’t fit with her performance on the train and again in the disabled toilet at Guildford station.
“My mum” she answered
“For god’s sake” I thought “you’re in your mid twenties, you’re a big girl now”
Out loud I just said
“Oh?”
“She has dementia, and I’m her carer”
Well did I feel bad when I heard that.
“I had to try and get home” Doreen said “but when I couldn’t I had to phone around and find someone to check on her”
“And did you?” I asked sympathetically
“Yes” she said with relief “one of the neighbours offered to stay with her overnight”
Then we just stood in the room for, I don’t know how long, her dressed in her outdoor clothes and me in a towel.
Until the pattern of her breathing changed and I felt the feather light kisses from her soft lips on my chest which prompted the tell tale tingle beneath my towel.
Her lips journeyed up my chest until they reached mine and she kissed me, a long deep liquid kiss with darting tongues, a quite electric kiss with just the right amount of urgency.
I was just contemplating getting inside her outdoor apparel when she broke away and jerked the towel off me
She stood back giving me an appraising look and bit her lip as she stared at my erection.
She flicked her eyes up and made the briefest contact with mine enough to cause her to blush but not enough to prevent her from returning her gaze to my swollen cock.
I sat down on the bed and Doreen removed her outdoor clothes.
She sat on a chair and removed her boots before returning to the middle of the room.
“Well don’t stop there,” I said
“No you have to do it” she replied
I stood up and stepped towards her, her gaze still fixed unashamedly on my cock.
We kissed again but this time her small hands busied themselves caressing my naked flesh.
Meanwhile I used one hand and unzipped the back of her dress while the other one was on her shoulder and instantly pulled the sleeve of her dress down her arm, Doreen obligingly slipped her arm out, and as the fabric fell away I was able to see her small breast encased behind pale green lace.
I repeated the operation with the other sleeve and the dress fell away to the floor and Doreen used her tiny feet to kick it away.
I glanced in the mirror and could see the reflection of her rear aspect as she stood there in just her underclothes and tights.
She had a tidy little figure and a gorgeous little arse, which I quickly fondled.
Then my hands proceed upwards and unhooked her bra. I didn’t wait to discard the garment first I just moved my hand straight to the prize and cupped her tit she sighed and snorted air in deeply through her nose as I toyed with her stiffening nipple.
Our mouths disengaged briefly and she took the opportunity to wriggle free from her harness.
Still fondling her breast we kissed again. But my cock was throbbing and there was a tell tale ache in my balls so reluctantly I released her pert tittie and instead slid my hands down inside her tights and knickers to fondle the flesh of her plump cheeks.
It took little effort to roll her tights down her buttocks to the top of her thighs.
I picked her up and in one fluid motion turned and threw her onto the bed, she gave a little scream as she landed on the bed followed by a fruity chuckle when I grabbed her ankle and began peeling her tights from her legs.
When she was naked I gave her a thorough appraisal, every inch of her small freckled frame with the pert tits and stiffened nipples and a flat stomach leading to her gloriously hairy brunette bush.
I dropped to my knees and began kissing my way up her thigh to that magnificent minge.
As enjoyable as our shag at Guildford station had been last year she didn’t have the time for me to do her full justice, and noshing her was not an option,
At the “Old Bell Inn” on St Patricks Day however I had all the time in the world.
As I proceeded upward along her thigh I could smell her pungent odour, a wonderful mix of femininity, arousal and twelve hours since it was last showered, this heady fragrance spurred me on, I looked up briefly and saw Doreen laying there with eyes closed biting her lip and as she opened up wide for me I buried my face in her moist minge.
Once I had satisfied both Doreen and my animal appetite.
I began kissing my way up her body, her primeval fragrance all around my mouth, I stopped when I reached her breasts and sucked on her teats while I fingered her hot pussy with two fingers, Doreen moaned deliciously as I frigged her and barked like a seal as she came.
I raised my head from my task to revel in her extraordinary exclamation.
Leaving her misshapen nipples wet with my saliva. I put my hand behind her neck and lifted her head up towards me so I could kiss her.
Despite my face still being wet with her pungent juices she responded urgently to my kiss, her tongue darting energetically in and out of my mouth.
Taking her by surprise I pushed her onto her back again and she looked up at me wickedly.
I was still kneeling on the floor and with her lying stretched out before be with one hand grasping a handful of duvet and the other playing with her swollen nipple.
She spread her legs wide and her juicy quim was at the perfect height to receive me.
She sucked in air through her teeth as I penetrated her and her skinny legs wrapped around me.
“Ahhhhh” she exclaimed when I was all the way in.
Doreen wriggled like a fish on the riverbank as I repeatedly skewered her tight juicy fanny and it was wetting my bally more and more with every stroke.
She came three times in quick succession making the same delicious sound, like a mother panting through a contraction.
“Shhh”
“Shhh”
“Shhh
Followed by a more expressive
“Ohhhhh”
I knew I couldn’t hold off much longer as I pumped her pussy I was very close to that ecstatic moment of conclusion
Doreen’s next big orgasm would be the finale for us both.
I had a great rhythm going and her skinny legs were still gripping me hard.
And as the strokes shortened her exclamations changed to soft rhythmic pants
“Ooh”
“Ooh”
Until we reached that perfect point of climax when we both came together and she screamed at the top of her lungs.
“Ahhhhhh”
As I emptied my sac into her grateful gash.
When I pulled out of her quivering quim she let out a long soft sigh of satisfaction.
An Antidote To Writers Block (Part 65) Mother’s Day
The morning after I unwrapped the pretty nurse that Molly sent me I rose early, which could only mean one thing, I had to split her strawberry whiskers again before breakfast.
When we eventually got out of bed I went upstairs to ready Katy for the day while Freya showered downstairs.
Then she pretended to arrive through the front door at 8 o’clock, I don’t think Katy was fooled for a moment but it made us feel better.
We repeated the experience on two more occasions over the following week and then she never came again, well not with me anyway.
The rest of the first week of March passed in a comfortable routine in which, day by day saw Katy spending almost imperceptibly more time sleeping. And weariness came over her at great speed.
Nothing much else happened though, I saw little of the village and my only contact with the world was through the visitors who came to see Katy and skypes with Georgia.
The only significant moment of the week was on Thursday when Olivier called around to see me.
“Any news about the sisters?” I whispered to her in the kitchen.
“Yes” she replied “and no”
“Ah” I responded
“I managed to track down Marion and they’re flying into Heathrow on Saturday afternoon” she said
“Excellent” I said thoughtfully
“You did mean for me to get two tickets?” she asked doubtfully
“Of course” I said “sorry for being so ambiguous”
Olivia paused for a second relieved she hadn’t over stepped the parameters of her brief.
“Anne on the other hand is proving to be a little more elusive, she and her husband are visiting outlying villages and I haven’t been able to contact her yet,” she said with a sigh before adding “she may not get here in time”
“All we can do is pray,” I suggested
On Friday lunchtime I left Katy in the very capable hands of Laura Gregory, who thought she would relieve me for a couple of hours, and I took a walk over to the Golf Club for some R & R.
I hadn’t set foot in the club since New Years Day when I rogered Shula over the billiard table.
In one corner I found my very good buddies Victoria Braithwaite, Judith Hunt and Pandora Parkinson-Brown.
“Simon” Judith shouted and the other two cheered in response
“Hello stranger” Pandy said with a distinct leer and stood up and kissed me.
“I’m glad you’re all here” I said genuinely “I haven’t seen you all together for an age”
Then Victoria and Judith also embraced me.
After all the hugging and kissing Judith was about to go to the bar and get me a drink when the barman arrived with a tray upon which sat my drink.
“Courtesy of the Captain, Mr Fisher” he said formerly
“Thank you” I said and nodded in the direction of the Captain.
And that set the trend for the afternoon as drink after drink appeared courtesy of appreciative members.
I had to take it a bit steady as it would not have been difficult to get completely shit faced thankfully another member stumped up for lunch.
It was very enjoyable catching up with the girls and what they were up to.
Judith updated me on how things were going with her new man Mortimer Beaumont while we ate.
Then Pandora talked about how things were progressing with Morty’s brother Harry.
And even Victoria had a beau, who she had known when she was a girl who she had recently met again after 30 years.
“So tell me what you’re up to this weekend,” I said
“Its mothers day weekend” they all said in unison, Victoria included
The Beaumont brothers were away visiting their mother in Cornwall, Judith was being taken up to London for the weekend by her sons, Pandora husband was having the children until Sunday lunchtime and Victoria was being treated by Maisie.
“She said I’m her adopted mum” Victoria said her eyes filling with tears.
“You old softy” I said handing her my hankie,
“Thank you Simon” she said and then blew her nose, not quite what I had in mind.
“So you’re not away for the weekend”? I asked Pandora
“No I’m having a very lazy weekend at home alone” she said giving me a sideways glance.
I spent Friday evening feeling a bit dopey as a result of all the hospitality but I still managed to finish reading “the Chamber of Secrets” to Katy and then read the first three chapters of “the Prisoner of Azkaban” before we called it a night.
Saturday began in much the same way as any other day of the preceding weeks.
Nurse, bath time, breakfast and visitors, same old same old,
With one notable difference namely a constant stream of text messages from Olivier updating on the progress of Katy’s sister Marion.
The flight leaving from Alaska was delayed, which meant they missed there connecting flight in New York.
Which meant waiting to get on the next available flight.
And all of this information was conveyed to me via text, which meant I was up and down like a tarts drawers.
Finally the message came saying they were on their way, this meant instead of the flight landing early on Saturday afternoon it wouldn’t arrive until tea time so they wouldn’t arrive at the house until well into the evening so I left Olivier to arrange for their collection from Heathrow.
I was a bit disappointed about the delay, as I had hoped I might pop over to Pandora’s after supper and avail myself of her delights.
Unless I had misread the signs I was defiantly invited, and was almost certainly expected – oh well some other time.
And I heard no more, now as annoying as Olivier’s constant texting became I soon found that hearing nothing was ten times worse.
Just before lunch I went into the kitchen and found Katy sitting on her throne with her arms folded and a real sulky expression on her face.
“What’s up grumpy?” I asked
“Shut up I’m sulking” she replied
“I can see that” I responded “but what are you sulking about?”
“I’ve been trying to get in touch with Marion, we always live chat on a Saturday morning at breakfast time, breakfast time here yesterday bedtime for her, But this morning nothing” she said despondently
“I wouldn’t worry, its probably just the weather, they have a lot of it up there you know” I suggested
“You’re a great help” Katy retorted
Katy soon shook off her sulky mood and spent the afternoon soundly thrashing me at crib.
I had had numerous more texts firstly from Olivier updating me on arrival times and then from Tilly, who along with Robert was meeting Bob and Marion Loader at Heathrow.
They had picked up the baton as I had to stay with Katy in order that she wouldn’t suspect anything, which she undoubtedly would have had I gone myself.
So as it was, Katy and I spent the afternoon and early evening as we would any other day.
Tilly texted just after five to say
“Flight landed”
The nurse came slightly earlier than usual to attend to Katy in the usual manner and then stayed later than normal.
Meanwhile I was preparing dinner; again this involved frozen meals and a preheated oven.
The only difference being that I had to cater for more than the two of us.
Just as I showed the nurse out I received another text from Tilly
“20 minutes away” it read
Katy hadn’t yet reappeared downstairs, which was not a bad thing as it meant I didn’t have to distract her, but it was time to find out where she had got to.
So after I had checked the food wasn’t burning I went upstairs and found her lying on the bed asleep.
I sat on the bed next to her and took hold of her hand in mine,
“Katy” I said softy, but there was no response
“Katy” I said again a little louder and she murmured before opening her eyes
“Oh Simon” she said surprised “Oh dear I only closed my eyes for a second”
“Its time to come downstairs for supper Hon” I said
“Can I have it in bed tonight?” she asked
“No not tonight” I replied
“Oh go on,” she begged
“No” I said and stood up “now come on lazy bones”
I knew only too well that in not many more weeks she would be have all of her meals in bed
“You’re just mean” she said and begrudgingly got up
I did however concede to her request for a piggyback down the stairs.
I had just got her settled on her throne in the kitchen when there was a knock at the front door.
“Who can that be?” Katy said, “I hope its not more visitors”
Then as an after thought she added
“Sorry God”
“I’ll go and see,” I said
When I got to the front door and opened it I found Tilly and Robert standing there either side of a slightly older version of Katy, and behind them was a tall thin gaunt looking man who I assumed to be Bob.
“Hello” I said then in a whisper I added in a whisper
“She’s in the kitchen”
“Who is it?” Katy called
“Its Robert and Tilly” I called back
“Ok” she answered
“Come in, come in” I said
There was a brief period of silent greetings and handshakes then I led the way up the hall to the kitchen with Marion following closely in my wake.
Katy was stood at the table laying place mats and cutlery as I walked in.
“I think you might need to set a few more places,” I said
“Why?” Katy began to ask and then I stepped aside and for a moment there was complete and utter silence
“Maz?” Katy asked, “Is that really you?”
“Who else would it be?” Marion replied as she walked towards her floundering sister and they embraced.
“How?” Katy uttered as tears welled up in her eyes
“Its all thanks to Simon” Marion said and she began to cry as well.
After an emotional five minutes Marion gathered herself sufficiently to say
“Look Bobs here as well, you haven’t met him yet”
After Bob and Katy had been introduced Marion unbuttoned her coat
“And you haven’t met this one either” she said and laid Katy’s hand on her bump.
“A baby?” Katy said and then the tears rained down again.
After the tears had subsided Katy turned her attention to me
And wrapped her arms around my neck
“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” she said “God bless you Simon”
Then Marion joined in and it all got a bit messy, and I was really way out of my comfort zone.
“Lets eat” I said and kissed the two women on the forehead
We were all sitting around the table after the meal drinking coffee when bob asked
“Is there a hotel near by?”
“Yes there is” I replied “but you’re staying here”
“No we can’t impose on you any further” Bob protested
“You have already done so much for us,” Marion Added
“Nonsense, you’re staying here and that’s an end to it” I insisted
Tilly had to leave after the meal as she was meeting up with Tristan and driving to their mums for mother’s day.
So I helped Bob and Robert retrieve the Loaders luggage from her car and then Bob and I left Robert and Tilly having a snoggy farewell on the doorstep and carried the bags upstairs to the spare room.
As it was a special occasion we opened some wine and sat around chatting.
When Katy got up and went to the loo Marion said
“You are a very kind man”
“Nonsense” I said rather embarrassed “let’s change the subject”
“What would have happened if you hadn’t been here when she had to leave the vicarage?” Bob asked
“Katy could have stayed at the Vicarage until the end if she’d wanted to; Robert was in no hurry to push her out he was quite happy staying at the pub”
“Rather” was Roberts’s only contribution
“The truth of the matter was Katy wanted to get out of Roberts way, but didn’t want to go into a hospice so as I live alone here in a huge house, and I work from home it seemed like the perfect solution”
“You are a kind man though” Marion persisted
“I’ve been very lucky in my life and when I was in a position to help someone who is much loved in the village, I took it”
I said
“Katy needs company, someone to help occupy her time and her mind so that’s my role, so now can we change the subject”
About an hour later Robert excused himself, as he still hadn’t finished writing Sundays sermon.
As Bob was sitting in an armchair snoring loudly and Katy and Marion were talking 10 to the dozen completely oblivious to their surroundings
I decided to leave with Robert
“I’m going to leave you two to catch up as I’m obviously surplus to requirements so I’m going to take a wander and get a nightcap at the Keys”
“Ok” Katy responded with a knowing look, she knew it wasn’t a nightcap I was going out for.
I walked with Robert as far as the Vicarage and then I turned down the lane by the church, which led to the path that crossed the golf course.
From there I traversed the course until I reached Pandora’s house.
I was pleased to see some of the house lights were still on.
So keeping in the shadows I made my way up to the house and tapped on the window,
It took a few minutes, but then Pandora came to the door already in her nightclothes.
She gave me a smile and opened the door
“I thought you weren’t coming,” she said
“Marion’s flight was delayed,” I responded while I watched her nipples erecting through her silk nightie in the cool night air
She noticed me looking at her tits but she made no effort to conceal them instead she said
“I thought I might have to attend to myself”
“Oh that sounds nice can I watch?” I replied
“You are incorrigible” she said and laughed, and then she took my hand and pulled me in through the door.
She closed the door behind me and drew the curtain then she slithered up against me and kissed my mouth.
“Where would you like me darling?” she asked
“Bed I think” I answered
“A good choice” she said and giggled
“Anywhere would have been a good choice Pandy,” I told her
“Shut up and get upstairs,” she ordered
I followed Pandora as she climbed the stairs my eyes fixed on her magnificent buttocks as they taunted me through the silk of her nightgown
“So if you had needed to attend to yourself what would you been thinking about?”
I asked
“I can’t tell you that,” she said coyly giving me a quick glance over her shoulder
As we reached the top stair I insisted
“I think you can”
“I cant” she reaffirmed as we reached the bedroom door I took hold of her and turned her towards me and kissed her
“Please” I said,
She stood staring at my chest and let out a huge sigh
“That day in the woods, by the 17th green, where you took me from behind over that fallen tree” she said quietly
“You enjoyed that day didn’t you?” I said proudly
Pandora nodded
“When I play that hole I still get a tingle down below,” she admitted still staring at my chest.
“And what else?” I asked as she opened the bedroom door
“The night of the summer ball” she answered as she pulled me into the room
“On the golf cart in the moonlight”
“And”? I persisted as we stood by the bed
“In the woods in the thunderstorm” she replied as she began to undress me, “and later in your house”
My shirt and trousers were discarded when I asked
“Is that all?”
“St Andrews day” she barked as she yanked my pants down “when I kidnapped you”
“And the day after” and one sock had gone
“And the day after that” and the other sock was removed.
“Is there anything in your Wank Bank that doesn’t involve me?”
“No” she said and kissed my helmet before standing up again
“So what do you want to do now?” I asked
“Put something else in the bank” she replied and slipped her fingers around my cock and kissed me.
“And how would madam like her deposit?” I asked
“Surprise me,” she answered tightening her grip on my shaft and kissing me again.
My hands were fondling the cheeks of her silk clad bum while she tugged on me.
I released the handfuls of arse and grabbed handfuls of her nightie and dragged it upwards.
Pandora released her hold on me and I pulled her nightgown off over her head.
Then I lifted her up so she was standing on the bed.
Pandora wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled my head towards her great globes surmounted by huge aroused nipples which she wafted about my lips, tempting and teasing me until she allowed me to engulf a great pink teat and sucked hard on it,
After a minute or so she pushed my head back leaving her misshapen saliva coated nip and then unceremoniously latched me on to the other.
After giving the appropriate period of attention I released her wet teat and pushed her backwards onto the bed.
Pandora bounced spectacularly on the bed and giggled as her tits bounced independently of the rest of her.
As I moved toward her Pandora, still giggling she tried to turn and scramble away.
I rapidly crawled up the bed and grabbed her ankle and pulled her back.
Having prevented her escape I could then slowly crawl up her tidy bod, kissing her belly as I crawled then her plump tits, sucking both teats before I reached her mouth and when our tongues engaged in a passionate duel my throbbing cock homed in on her moist crack like a missile.
I entered her pussy all the way, and as I pushed my cock into her welcoming wetness breath exhaled from her mouth.
Pandora’s thighs gripped me tightly and her noisy responses to my strokes urged me on and I pounded on her more, the pace increasing steadily, faster and faster.
Her nails were in my back as we moaned and grunted in unison. We sped on quickening the pace and shortening the stroke until we reached maximum velocity and we both exploded in utter ecstasy.
We lay locked in that embrace, a single, sweating panting beast for several minutes until I rolled off her and there we lay exhausted and spent for an indeterminate period.
Eventually I looked at her and said
“Will that make it to the bank?”
“Oh God yes” she replied still panting.
When we eventually got out of bed I went upstairs to ready Katy for the day while Freya showered downstairs.
Then she pretended to arrive through the front door at 8 o’clock, I don’t think Katy was fooled for a moment but it made us feel better.
We repeated the experience on two more occasions over the following week and then she never came again, well not with me anyway.
The rest of the first week of March passed in a comfortable routine in which, day by day saw Katy spending almost imperceptibly more time sleeping. And weariness came over her at great speed.
Nothing much else happened though, I saw little of the village and my only contact with the world was through the visitors who came to see Katy and skypes with Georgia.
The only significant moment of the week was on Thursday when Olivier called around to see me.
“Any news about the sisters?” I whispered to her in the kitchen.
“Yes” she replied “and no”
“Ah” I responded
“I managed to track down Marion and they’re flying into Heathrow on Saturday afternoon” she said
“Excellent” I said thoughtfully
“You did mean for me to get two tickets?” she asked doubtfully
“Of course” I said “sorry for being so ambiguous”
Olivia paused for a second relieved she hadn’t over stepped the parameters of her brief.
“Anne on the other hand is proving to be a little more elusive, she and her husband are visiting outlying villages and I haven’t been able to contact her yet,” she said with a sigh before adding “she may not get here in time”
“All we can do is pray,” I suggested
On Friday lunchtime I left Katy in the very capable hands of Laura Gregory, who thought she would relieve me for a couple of hours, and I took a walk over to the Golf Club for some R & R.
I hadn’t set foot in the club since New Years Day when I rogered Shula over the billiard table.
In one corner I found my very good buddies Victoria Braithwaite, Judith Hunt and Pandora Parkinson-Brown.
“Simon” Judith shouted and the other two cheered in response
“Hello stranger” Pandy said with a distinct leer and stood up and kissed me.
“I’m glad you’re all here” I said genuinely “I haven’t seen you all together for an age”
Then Victoria and Judith also embraced me.
After all the hugging and kissing Judith was about to go to the bar and get me a drink when the barman arrived with a tray upon which sat my drink.
“Courtesy of the Captain, Mr Fisher” he said formerly
“Thank you” I said and nodded in the direction of the Captain.
And that set the trend for the afternoon as drink after drink appeared courtesy of appreciative members.
I had to take it a bit steady as it would not have been difficult to get completely shit faced thankfully another member stumped up for lunch.
It was very enjoyable catching up with the girls and what they were up to.
Judith updated me on how things were going with her new man Mortimer Beaumont while we ate.
Then Pandora talked about how things were progressing with Morty’s brother Harry.
And even Victoria had a beau, who she had known when she was a girl who she had recently met again after 30 years.
“So tell me what you’re up to this weekend,” I said
“Its mothers day weekend” they all said in unison, Victoria included
The Beaumont brothers were away visiting their mother in Cornwall, Judith was being taken up to London for the weekend by her sons, Pandora husband was having the children until Sunday lunchtime and Victoria was being treated by Maisie.
“She said I’m her adopted mum” Victoria said her eyes filling with tears.
“You old softy” I said handing her my hankie,
“Thank you Simon” she said and then blew her nose, not quite what I had in mind.
“So you’re not away for the weekend”? I asked Pandora
“No I’m having a very lazy weekend at home alone” she said giving me a sideways glance.
I spent Friday evening feeling a bit dopey as a result of all the hospitality but I still managed to finish reading “the Chamber of Secrets” to Katy and then read the first three chapters of “the Prisoner of Azkaban” before we called it a night.
Saturday began in much the same way as any other day of the preceding weeks.
Nurse, bath time, breakfast and visitors, same old same old,
With one notable difference namely a constant stream of text messages from Olivier updating on the progress of Katy’s sister Marion.
The flight leaving from Alaska was delayed, which meant they missed there connecting flight in New York.
Which meant waiting to get on the next available flight.
And all of this information was conveyed to me via text, which meant I was up and down like a tarts drawers.
Finally the message came saying they were on their way, this meant instead of the flight landing early on Saturday afternoon it wouldn’t arrive until tea time so they wouldn’t arrive at the house until well into the evening so I left Olivier to arrange for their collection from Heathrow.
I was a bit disappointed about the delay, as I had hoped I might pop over to Pandora’s after supper and avail myself of her delights.
Unless I had misread the signs I was defiantly invited, and was almost certainly expected – oh well some other time.
And I heard no more, now as annoying as Olivier’s constant texting became I soon found that hearing nothing was ten times worse.
Just before lunch I went into the kitchen and found Katy sitting on her throne with her arms folded and a real sulky expression on her face.
“What’s up grumpy?” I asked
“Shut up I’m sulking” she replied
“I can see that” I responded “but what are you sulking about?”
“I’ve been trying to get in touch with Marion, we always live chat on a Saturday morning at breakfast time, breakfast time here yesterday bedtime for her, But this morning nothing” she said despondently
“I wouldn’t worry, its probably just the weather, they have a lot of it up there you know” I suggested
“You’re a great help” Katy retorted
Katy soon shook off her sulky mood and spent the afternoon soundly thrashing me at crib.
I had had numerous more texts firstly from Olivier updating me on arrival times and then from Tilly, who along with Robert was meeting Bob and Marion Loader at Heathrow.
They had picked up the baton as I had to stay with Katy in order that she wouldn’t suspect anything, which she undoubtedly would have had I gone myself.
So as it was, Katy and I spent the afternoon and early evening as we would any other day.
Tilly texted just after five to say
“Flight landed”
The nurse came slightly earlier than usual to attend to Katy in the usual manner and then stayed later than normal.
Meanwhile I was preparing dinner; again this involved frozen meals and a preheated oven.
The only difference being that I had to cater for more than the two of us.
Just as I showed the nurse out I received another text from Tilly
“20 minutes away” it read
Katy hadn’t yet reappeared downstairs, which was not a bad thing as it meant I didn’t have to distract her, but it was time to find out where she had got to.
So after I had checked the food wasn’t burning I went upstairs and found her lying on the bed asleep.
I sat on the bed next to her and took hold of her hand in mine,
“Katy” I said softy, but there was no response
“Katy” I said again a little louder and she murmured before opening her eyes
“Oh Simon” she said surprised “Oh dear I only closed my eyes for a second”
“Its time to come downstairs for supper Hon” I said
“Can I have it in bed tonight?” she asked
“No not tonight” I replied
“Oh go on,” she begged
“No” I said and stood up “now come on lazy bones”
I knew only too well that in not many more weeks she would be have all of her meals in bed
“You’re just mean” she said and begrudgingly got up
I did however concede to her request for a piggyback down the stairs.
I had just got her settled on her throne in the kitchen when there was a knock at the front door.
“Who can that be?” Katy said, “I hope its not more visitors”
Then as an after thought she added
“Sorry God”
“I’ll go and see,” I said
When I got to the front door and opened it I found Tilly and Robert standing there either side of a slightly older version of Katy, and behind them was a tall thin gaunt looking man who I assumed to be Bob.
“Hello” I said then in a whisper I added in a whisper
“She’s in the kitchen”
“Who is it?” Katy called
“Its Robert and Tilly” I called back
“Ok” she answered
“Come in, come in” I said
There was a brief period of silent greetings and handshakes then I led the way up the hall to the kitchen with Marion following closely in my wake.
Katy was stood at the table laying place mats and cutlery as I walked in.
“I think you might need to set a few more places,” I said
“Why?” Katy began to ask and then I stepped aside and for a moment there was complete and utter silence
“Maz?” Katy asked, “Is that really you?”
“Who else would it be?” Marion replied as she walked towards her floundering sister and they embraced.
“How?” Katy uttered as tears welled up in her eyes
“Its all thanks to Simon” Marion said and she began to cry as well.
After an emotional five minutes Marion gathered herself sufficiently to say
“Look Bobs here as well, you haven’t met him yet”
After Bob and Katy had been introduced Marion unbuttoned her coat
“And you haven’t met this one either” she said and laid Katy’s hand on her bump.
“A baby?” Katy said and then the tears rained down again.
After the tears had subsided Katy turned her attention to me
And wrapped her arms around my neck
“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” she said “God bless you Simon”
Then Marion joined in and it all got a bit messy, and I was really way out of my comfort zone.
“Lets eat” I said and kissed the two women on the forehead
We were all sitting around the table after the meal drinking coffee when bob asked
“Is there a hotel near by?”
“Yes there is” I replied “but you’re staying here”
“No we can’t impose on you any further” Bob protested
“You have already done so much for us,” Marion Added
“Nonsense, you’re staying here and that’s an end to it” I insisted
Tilly had to leave after the meal as she was meeting up with Tristan and driving to their mums for mother’s day.
So I helped Bob and Robert retrieve the Loaders luggage from her car and then Bob and I left Robert and Tilly having a snoggy farewell on the doorstep and carried the bags upstairs to the spare room.
As it was a special occasion we opened some wine and sat around chatting.
When Katy got up and went to the loo Marion said
“You are a very kind man”
“Nonsense” I said rather embarrassed “let’s change the subject”
“What would have happened if you hadn’t been here when she had to leave the vicarage?” Bob asked
“Katy could have stayed at the Vicarage until the end if she’d wanted to; Robert was in no hurry to push her out he was quite happy staying at the pub”
“Rather” was Roberts’s only contribution
“The truth of the matter was Katy wanted to get out of Roberts way, but didn’t want to go into a hospice so as I live alone here in a huge house, and I work from home it seemed like the perfect solution”
“You are a kind man though” Marion persisted
“I’ve been very lucky in my life and when I was in a position to help someone who is much loved in the village, I took it”
I said
“Katy needs company, someone to help occupy her time and her mind so that’s my role, so now can we change the subject”
About an hour later Robert excused himself, as he still hadn’t finished writing Sundays sermon.
As Bob was sitting in an armchair snoring loudly and Katy and Marion were talking 10 to the dozen completely oblivious to their surroundings
I decided to leave with Robert
“I’m going to leave you two to catch up as I’m obviously surplus to requirements so I’m going to take a wander and get a nightcap at the Keys”
“Ok” Katy responded with a knowing look, she knew it wasn’t a nightcap I was going out for.
I walked with Robert as far as the Vicarage and then I turned down the lane by the church, which led to the path that crossed the golf course.
From there I traversed the course until I reached Pandora’s house.
I was pleased to see some of the house lights were still on.
So keeping in the shadows I made my way up to the house and tapped on the window,
It took a few minutes, but then Pandora came to the door already in her nightclothes.
She gave me a smile and opened the door
“I thought you weren’t coming,” she said
“Marion’s flight was delayed,” I responded while I watched her nipples erecting through her silk nightie in the cool night air
She noticed me looking at her tits but she made no effort to conceal them instead she said
“I thought I might have to attend to myself”
“Oh that sounds nice can I watch?” I replied
“You are incorrigible” she said and laughed, and then she took my hand and pulled me in through the door.
She closed the door behind me and drew the curtain then she slithered up against me and kissed my mouth.
“Where would you like me darling?” she asked
“Bed I think” I answered
“A good choice” she said and giggled
“Anywhere would have been a good choice Pandy,” I told her
“Shut up and get upstairs,” she ordered
I followed Pandora as she climbed the stairs my eyes fixed on her magnificent buttocks as they taunted me through the silk of her nightgown
“So if you had needed to attend to yourself what would you been thinking about?”
I asked
“I can’t tell you that,” she said coyly giving me a quick glance over her shoulder
As we reached the top stair I insisted
“I think you can”
“I cant” she reaffirmed as we reached the bedroom door I took hold of her and turned her towards me and kissed her
“Please” I said,
She stood staring at my chest and let out a huge sigh
“That day in the woods, by the 17th green, where you took me from behind over that fallen tree” she said quietly
“You enjoyed that day didn’t you?” I said proudly
Pandora nodded
“When I play that hole I still get a tingle down below,” she admitted still staring at my chest.
“And what else?” I asked as she opened the bedroom door
“The night of the summer ball” she answered as she pulled me into the room
“On the golf cart in the moonlight”
“And”? I persisted as we stood by the bed
“In the woods in the thunderstorm” she replied as she began to undress me, “and later in your house”
My shirt and trousers were discarded when I asked
“Is that all?”
“St Andrews day” she barked as she yanked my pants down “when I kidnapped you”
“And the day after” and one sock had gone
“And the day after that” and the other sock was removed.
“Is there anything in your Wank Bank that doesn’t involve me?”
“No” she said and kissed my helmet before standing up again
“So what do you want to do now?” I asked
“Put something else in the bank” she replied and slipped her fingers around my cock and kissed me.
“And how would madam like her deposit?” I asked
“Surprise me,” she answered tightening her grip on my shaft and kissing me again.
My hands were fondling the cheeks of her silk clad bum while she tugged on me.
I released the handfuls of arse and grabbed handfuls of her nightie and dragged it upwards.
Pandora released her hold on me and I pulled her nightgown off over her head.
Then I lifted her up so she was standing on the bed.
Pandora wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled my head towards her great globes surmounted by huge aroused nipples which she wafted about my lips, tempting and teasing me until she allowed me to engulf a great pink teat and sucked hard on it,
After a minute or so she pushed my head back leaving her misshapen saliva coated nip and then unceremoniously latched me on to the other.
After giving the appropriate period of attention I released her wet teat and pushed her backwards onto the bed.
Pandora bounced spectacularly on the bed and giggled as her tits bounced independently of the rest of her.
As I moved toward her Pandora, still giggling she tried to turn and scramble away.
I rapidly crawled up the bed and grabbed her ankle and pulled her back.
Having prevented her escape I could then slowly crawl up her tidy bod, kissing her belly as I crawled then her plump tits, sucking both teats before I reached her mouth and when our tongues engaged in a passionate duel my throbbing cock homed in on her moist crack like a missile.
I entered her pussy all the way, and as I pushed my cock into her welcoming wetness breath exhaled from her mouth.
Pandora’s thighs gripped me tightly and her noisy responses to my strokes urged me on and I pounded on her more, the pace increasing steadily, faster and faster.
Her nails were in my back as we moaned and grunted in unison. We sped on quickening the pace and shortening the stroke until we reached maximum velocity and we both exploded in utter ecstasy.
We lay locked in that embrace, a single, sweating panting beast for several minutes until I rolled off her and there we lay exhausted and spent for an indeterminate period.
Eventually I looked at her and said
“Will that make it to the bank?”
“Oh God yes” she replied still panting.
A Little Bit Of Humour # 12
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 292
There was an Owl lived in an oak.
And one day his hoot became a croak
His feathers were drab for all too see
Then he gasped and fell out of the tree
ARE YOU WEARING A KNITTED SWIMSUIT?
Are you wearing a knitted swimsuit?
Well I know there’s a recession on
But I’m afraid knitted swimwear
Isn’t at all the right thing to don
Because one of two things will happen
The weight of wool will pull them down
Or when you are swimming the weight
Will pull you under and you’ll drown
A GOLF OF DIFFERENCE
I have been playing Golf for years
And sometimes it makes me curse
But it doesn’t matter how bad I play
I know next time it could be worse
FOUL WEATHER GOLFER
If you don’t mind playing Golf in the rain,
Snow, Storm, Tempest or a hurricane,
Then not wishing to burst your bubble
It’s not just your golf game that’s in trouble
WE ARE TRADITIONALISTS # 2
We are traditionalists
In our village
Deep in little Britain.
And on a weekend
There is nothing
We like better
Than a game
Of ten peasant bowling
YOU CAN’T TAKE IT WITH YOU
“You can’t take it with you”
That’s what they say
But at the end of the day
A will is a dead giveaway
A BICYCLE COULDN'T STAND UP
A bicycle couldn't stand up
Alone it transpired
Because after a cycle
It was obviously two tired
WHEN I LIVED IN MELBOURNE
When I lived in Melbourne
I often used to wonder
Why the Local Area Network
Wasn’t called The LAN down under
COULD I TRY ON THAT PRETTY DRESS
"Could I try on that pretty dress
In the window?" she asked him
He replied "well I would prefer
That you used a cubicle madam"
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 293
There were two birds sat on a stone
The farmer saw them and then went home
He returned later with a loaded gun
Took close aim and then there were none
WHEN I FIRST MET HER
When I first met her
I was attracted by her looks
My first thought was not
I wonder if she cooks
But her literary inadequacy’s
One certainly brooks
She was only ever interested
In my cheque books
MY HUSBAND’S BEHAVIOUR
My husband’s behaviour
Is truly appalling
However it’s my fault really
Which is quite galling
If I hadn’t fed him cat food
Just for the laughs
He wouldn’t sit on the carpet
Licking his own arse
SINCE THE BEGINNING OF TIME
Since the beginning of time, the one thing
A woman really wants from her man
Is his commitment, its not a lot to expect
So have him committed as soon as you can
IF YOU’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR
If you’ve been looking for
A committed man for ions,
You should have started
In the mental institution
ARE YOU WEARING SILK DRAWERS?
Are you wearing silk drawers?
I only ask you as I can see
That you appear to be the victim
Of an elastic deficiency
And if you combine that
With the force of gravity
They are around your ankles
You may think it a catastrophe
But I would beg to differ
For me it’s just serendipity
There was an Owl lived in an oak.
And one day his hoot became a croak
His feathers were drab for all too see
Then he gasped and fell out of the tree
ARE YOU WEARING A KNITTED SWIMSUIT?
Are you wearing a knitted swimsuit?
Well I know there’s a recession on
But I’m afraid knitted swimwear
Isn’t at all the right thing to don
Because one of two things will happen
The weight of wool will pull them down
Or when you are swimming the weight
Will pull you under and you’ll drown
A GOLF OF DIFFERENCE
I have been playing Golf for years
And sometimes it makes me curse
But it doesn’t matter how bad I play
I know next time it could be worse
FOUL WEATHER GOLFER
If you don’t mind playing Golf in the rain,
Snow, Storm, Tempest or a hurricane,
Then not wishing to burst your bubble
It’s not just your golf game that’s in trouble
WE ARE TRADITIONALISTS # 2
We are traditionalists
In our village
Deep in little Britain.
And on a weekend
There is nothing
We like better
Than a game
Of ten peasant bowling
YOU CAN’T TAKE IT WITH YOU
“You can’t take it with you”
That’s what they say
But at the end of the day
A will is a dead giveaway
A BICYCLE COULDN'T STAND UP
A bicycle couldn't stand up
Alone it transpired
Because after a cycle
It was obviously two tired
WHEN I LIVED IN MELBOURNE
When I lived in Melbourne
I often used to wonder
Why the Local Area Network
Wasn’t called The LAN down under
COULD I TRY ON THAT PRETTY DRESS
"Could I try on that pretty dress
In the window?" she asked him
He replied "well I would prefer
That you used a cubicle madam"
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 293
There were two birds sat on a stone
The farmer saw them and then went home
He returned later with a loaded gun
Took close aim and then there were none
WHEN I FIRST MET HER
When I first met her
I was attracted by her looks
My first thought was not
I wonder if she cooks
But her literary inadequacy’s
One certainly brooks
She was only ever interested
In my cheque books
MY HUSBAND’S BEHAVIOUR
My husband’s behaviour
Is truly appalling
However it’s my fault really
Which is quite galling
If I hadn’t fed him cat food
Just for the laughs
He wouldn’t sit on the carpet
Licking his own arse
SINCE THE BEGINNING OF TIME
Since the beginning of time, the one thing
A woman really wants from her man
Is his commitment, its not a lot to expect
So have him committed as soon as you can
IF YOU’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR
If you’ve been looking for
A committed man for ions,
You should have started
In the mental institution
ARE YOU WEARING SILK DRAWERS?
Are you wearing silk drawers?
I only ask you as I can see
That you appear to be the victim
Of an elastic deficiency
And if you combine that
With the force of gravity
They are around your ankles
You may think it a catastrophe
But I would beg to differ
For me it’s just serendipity
A Little Bit Of Humour # 11
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 290
Robin and Richard were two pretty men,
They laid in bed till the clock struck ten;
Then up starts Robin and looks at the sky:
"Oh, sod it Richard, the sun's very high!
Stop sniggering and pull on your knickers
We’re late for training at Twickers”
THE PRACTICE SWING
If your practice swing
Is the best you can do
Then I would have to say
That Golfs not for you
ARE YOU WEARING A TOGA?
Are you wearing a toga?
I don’t want to be an ogre
But you’ll be a hit alright
At the house party tonight
As everyone will be knowing.
Because you will be showing
That beneath the flowing robes
You have unfettered globes
THE GIMME
If the “Gimme Putt”
Is the best you can do
Then I would have to say
That Golfs not for you
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 291
Blow wind, blow
And go, mill, go
I heard the miller cry
But I don’t know why
He needs wind to grind
He’s clearly lost his mind
I know he has corn
To grind before dawn
And I know it’s hectic
But the Mill is electric
So he should know
If the wind did blow
The sails would be still
And it won’t turn the mill
ARE YOU WEARING ROMAN ROBES?
Are you wearing Roman robes?
They’re very loose and flowing
And they fit where they touch
Without any detail showing
Which keeps a man guessing
I really like that about them
Because it’ll be a surprise later
When I take you up the forum
RUNNING GENES
Scientists say there are now
Running Genes
But surely it would chafe
If you ran in Jeans
DANCING TO HIP HOP
I like breakin’ and poppin’
And dancing to Hip hop
At Sixty I should be stoppin’
As I’m down for a Hip op
ARE YOU WEARING A REUNION BADGE?
Are you wearing a reunion badge?
No wonder you look depressed
Steer clear of the class reunion
It will just leave you distressed
I know it was a bit of fun looking
At the old school year books
But going will just make you feel
Older than everyone else looks
GENETIC MARKERS
Scientists say they have discovered
Genetic markers that indicate athleticism
I think if they take a close look at mine
I will have markers for Couch potatoism
PORTMANTEAU
I was looking for a word
That summed up slogan or motto
But something more pithy
In the end I settled on Slotto
21ST CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES
21st Century Nursery Rhymes
I really find are such a doddle
Though most people think
That they are a load of twaddle
But as I rapidly approach
The autumn of my days
It’s frankly just too late
For me to change my ways
DIVIDING OPINION
Because of the obvious risk
That one of us might fall
I had a stair lift fitted
Which I don’t mind at all
But my wife says that its
Driving her up the wall
WE ARE TRADITIONALISTS # 1
We are traditionalists
In our village
Deep in little Britain.
And on a weekend
There is nothing
We like better
Than a game
Of spin the pauper
Robin and Richard were two pretty men,
They laid in bed till the clock struck ten;
Then up starts Robin and looks at the sky:
"Oh, sod it Richard, the sun's very high!
Stop sniggering and pull on your knickers
We’re late for training at Twickers”
THE PRACTICE SWING
If your practice swing
Is the best you can do
Then I would have to say
That Golfs not for you
ARE YOU WEARING A TOGA?
Are you wearing a toga?
I don’t want to be an ogre
But you’ll be a hit alright
At the house party tonight
As everyone will be knowing.
Because you will be showing
That beneath the flowing robes
You have unfettered globes
THE GIMME
If the “Gimme Putt”
Is the best you can do
Then I would have to say
That Golfs not for you
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 291
Blow wind, blow
And go, mill, go
I heard the miller cry
But I don’t know why
He needs wind to grind
He’s clearly lost his mind
I know he has corn
To grind before dawn
And I know it’s hectic
But the Mill is electric
So he should know
If the wind did blow
The sails would be still
And it won’t turn the mill
ARE YOU WEARING ROMAN ROBES?
Are you wearing Roman robes?
They’re very loose and flowing
And they fit where they touch
Without any detail showing
Which keeps a man guessing
I really like that about them
Because it’ll be a surprise later
When I take you up the forum
RUNNING GENES
Scientists say there are now
Running Genes
But surely it would chafe
If you ran in Jeans
DANCING TO HIP HOP
I like breakin’ and poppin’
And dancing to Hip hop
At Sixty I should be stoppin’
As I’m down for a Hip op
ARE YOU WEARING A REUNION BADGE?
Are you wearing a reunion badge?
No wonder you look depressed
Steer clear of the class reunion
It will just leave you distressed
I know it was a bit of fun looking
At the old school year books
But going will just make you feel
Older than everyone else looks
GENETIC MARKERS
Scientists say they have discovered
Genetic markers that indicate athleticism
I think if they take a close look at mine
I will have markers for Couch potatoism
PORTMANTEAU
I was looking for a word
That summed up slogan or motto
But something more pithy
In the end I settled on Slotto
21ST CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES
21st Century Nursery Rhymes
I really find are such a doddle
Though most people think
That they are a load of twaddle
But as I rapidly approach
The autumn of my days
It’s frankly just too late
For me to change my ways
DIVIDING OPINION
Because of the obvious risk
That one of us might fall
I had a stair lift fitted
Which I don’t mind at all
But my wife says that its
Driving her up the wall
WE ARE TRADITIONALISTS # 1
We are traditionalists
In our village
Deep in little Britain.
And on a weekend
There is nothing
We like better
Than a game
Of spin the pauper
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