A GIFT FOR MARIA

 

A young man called Paul

Wanted to buy a present

For his new sweetheart Maria

As a Christmas present

 

As they’d not been dating

For a very long duration

He decided to purchase

After careful consideration

A nice pair of gloves,

striking the right note

Not too romantic or personal

So the gloves got his vote

 

Accompanied by Maria’s sister

He went to Harrods and bought

A dainty pair of white gloves

“She will like these” he thought

 

Maria’s sister Susan bought

A pair of panties for herself

But during the wrapping

An error was made on the shelf

 

The assistant mixed up

The gloves and the panties

The sister got the gloves

And Maria got the scanties

 

Without checking Paul sealed

The package along with a note

And sent it to his sweetheart

And this is what he wrote

Dear Maria, I chose these

As I noticed my darling

That you don’t wear any

When we go out in the evening.

 

If not for your sister Susan

I would have got long ones

The type with the buttons,

But Susan wears short ones

That are easier to remove.

They are a delicate shade,

But the shop assistant

where the purchase was made

Showed me the pair she has

That she’d been wearing

and were hardly soiled

After three weeks wearing 

I had her try yours on for me

And she looked really chic

Even though they were

Tight on her a little bit.

 

She told me that her pair

Helps to keep her ring

Clean and shiny, and in fact

And this is interesting

Since she’d begun wearing them.

It hadn’t needed washing

 

I really hope you like them

And wish I were there with you

To put them on you Maria

for the first time I really do

 

As no doubt many other hands

Will have touched them

Before I see you again

Remember when you remove them

To blow into them before

Putting them away and drying 

As they will naturally be

A little damp from wearing

 

Just think how many times

My lips will kiss them
during the coming year.

I hope you will wear them

For me on Friday night
All my love Paul till then

 

P.S. The latest style

Which appears to be growing

Is to wear them folded down

With a little fur showing