A Little Bit Of Humour # 21

MEMORY OF AN ELEPHANT

Apparently my Dad
Has the memory of an Elephant
When he was a boy
He went Zoo and saw an Elephant

MY FATHER WAS TRYING TO EXPLAIN

My Father was trying to explain
About anaphylactic shock again
And wasn’t doing it very well
I could have explained it in a nutshell

I AM NOT IN ANY WAY INTERESTED IN

I am not in any way interested in
An alternative energy supplier
Because if I said I was unhappy
With food I would be a liar

MY CAT IS A FUSSY EATER # 1

My cat is a fussy eater
That’s not uncommon for a Siamese
And for breakfast she will only eat
A bowl of Mice Crispies

SHE WAS A VERY BIG LASS

She was a very big lass
And Apple shaped I suppose
But she was dressed
In quite unsuitable clothes

Beige Lycra pedal pushers
And a long white clingy top
They would have looked better
Left hanging in the shop

It certainly was a sight
I wouldn’t easily forget
As I watched her in the sun
Looking like a melting cornet

LOOKING FOR A NEW START

My wife and I were
Looking for a new start
So I bought a Waterbed
To rekindle loves spark
Something fresh and exciting
But we just drifted apart

A CARELESSLY DISCARDED MATCH

A carelessly discarded match
Can start a forest fire
Yet it takes a whole box
To light your bonfire

RCN HYMN

From the wards of emphysema
To the floors of maternity
We are proud to all be members
Of the nursing fraternity

We work for the sake of patients
As keep our hospital clean:
And we fight the daily battles
In blue or white or green

THE DISAPPEARANCE OF A MUMMY

The disappearance of a mummy
Was investigated by Inspector Grace
And with his years of experience
He soon wrapped up the case

MY CAT IS A FUSSY EATER # 2

My cat is a fussy eater
That’s not uncommon for a Siamese
And some days only RATatouille
On a bed of Mice will please

I WAS AT A FANCY DRESS PARTY

I was at a fancy dress party
And looking for something tarty
I was beginning to lose hope
When I got an unexpected grope
And I was forced to conclude
When things got decidedly rude
That for the very best nooky
You should do it with a Wooky

JULIUS CAESAR’S APPROACH

Julius Caesar’s approach
May have been absurd
But a different approach
Was what he preferred
Which is why he came,
He saw, he concurred