21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 307

 Saw ye Eppie Marly, honey,

The woman that sells anything, honey?

She's lost her virtue and a' her money,

Wi' following a Goodtime Charlie, honey.

CANDY CANES, CINNAMON AND GINGER

 

Candy Canes,

Cinnamon and Ginger

Are some of my favourite

Christmas things

Especially when

They’re only wearing

Christmas Stockings

And Popcorn Strings

IF YOU PUT CANDY CANES ON THE TREE

 

If you put Candy canes on the tree

And Popcorn on strings

Then let me give the kind of advice

That experience brings

Don’t pack them away after the

Bell of New Year rings

Otherwise, next year they will be

Seriously unsavoury things

IF YOU PUT CANDY CANES ON THE TREE

 

If you put Candy canes on the tree

And Popcorn on strings

Then let me give the kind of advice

That experience brings

Don’t pack them away after the

Bell of New Year rings

Otherwise, next year they will be

Seriously unsavoury things

IN THE CHRISTMAS VILLAGE

 

In the Christmas village

At the North Pole

There is much excitement

Being kept under control

As there is to be an election

For every Elf and Troll

Votes can of course be cast

At the North Poll

AUGUST EXPECTATIONS FADE

 

August expectations fade and this season

My team has once again failed to impress

Our end of season video will once again

Be in the shops in time for Christmas

CHRISTMAS KEBAB

 

I love a Kebab at Christmas

More than any other time of year

Their infinite variety of fillings

Fills me with Christmas cheer

You don’t have to eat the same

Stereotypical stuffed pitta

Apart from Donner you can have

Comet, Cupid, Dancer and Dasher